Phobia symptoms

Does anyone else feel sick after trying to tough out a dental session? I shake, feel horribly nauseous, freezing cold, exhausted and darkly bleak, have nightmares.

The dentists I've met so far on this island are a brutal lot, emotionally and physically. Since finding this site, I've decided to try to find that mythical dentist who might show a little compassion. I had just given up. Having all my teeth out was beginning to seem my only option.

Oh Barbara, I can relate to your feelings. For YEARS I was unable to even make an appointment with a dentist because just looking up the number in a phone book made me physically ill. It's such a terrible feeling. Glad you found this forum..it has helped me immensely..and I'm sure it will you as well.

I am exactly the same way too... sickness, the runs, total insomnia, I can pass out, be sick or ave nose bleeds when I get there, all sorts.. You have found the right place though... lots of suport here... Good luck x x

Terrified Woman and Penny

Cosmic relief to learn that I'm not the only one! - sorry as I am this happens to others. Do you think it's possibly a physical response to being repeatedly tortured - careless or inadequate freezing that does not take, then major work being done anyway while someone is snarling at you?

This can't be unusual. Dental drill sounds are rated as the most disliked sound in the world.

I'm in Canada. I don't know if the U.S. or England is possibly better.

You say this group helped you..... Was it encouragement to keep searching until you found someone who actually took the time to freeze your teeth? That doesn't seem too much to ask. And then there's these symptoms that develope over time. No wonder our bodies panic as they approach it yet again.

Barbara, I think in my case it helped just knowing I wasn't alone in my fears. For so long I wondered what was wrong with me..an adult woman who was afraid to see a dentist. Everyone I knew saw the dentist. My family members went to the dentist. But me? NO WAY. I didn't even want to TALK about the dentist with family members! My husband would come home from his dentist and I would do anything to change the subject ASAP!

In May I found this forum and spent a few days just reading through the Journals section. It was filled with people JUST LIKE ME...and most of them had actually already found the courage to get help with their dental problems! I finally had what I needed most....HOPE.

I won't try to fool you..it still wasn't easy making that first appointment. BUT..I honestly felt like I had a HUGE group of people standing beside me saying "You CAN do this!"..and it made a world of difference. For me it was too late to save my teeth..and I am now on day 5 of a set of lovely new dentures. True..it wouldn't be my first choice..but it's not as bad as I imagined. I can talk..today I've discovered I can still actually eat..and best of all..I CAN SMILE without embarrassment!

If you're searching for an understanding dentist..ask friends..ask family..ask people you work with. I've found people are honest about things like that.
I wish you lots of luck..and please stick around. You'll get so much badly needed support here.

thats great!!! I am really pleased for you and your new teeth!!! I actually have quite good teeth, I struggle on with it in the hope of keeping them. I can't talk to anyone around me about this, so for me this is the only place I can express my fears and know people understand. Hang on in there.. don't be too hard on yourself, it would be a very strange person indeed who wanted to go and get drilled an filled etc... don't you think?? When my nerves are at their peek and I am running on pure adrenalin I try to remember people pay good money to try to feel like this!! That helps a little!! I feel stupid getting in this state over a simple check up when other people face far worse.. but that is the nature of a phobia and the best you can do is work with it and try to find a way round the issues. But you willl.... x x

went into the dentist 3 weeks ago and i was told i,ve had to have 4 tooth exstractions and 4 damaged teeth repairedbeen in twice since and had a filling last week the simpilest of the lot and painless during and after than went back in this morning and was getting the worst job done a tooth exstraction on the worst tooth i thought i was in for severe pain but nothing again,pressure is all you feel and im grand all day eating away and have,nt even touched a painkiller so please anyone with fears it is nothing.and i,ve realised the hard...

You're definitely not alone in this. I feel exactly the same way. I thought I was "special" but my dentist said that A LOT of people are like this regarding dental work.

Hi

Dental anxiety/phobia is very widespread. In the USA it is estimated that 20% of the population (30-50 million people) have dental anxiety/phobia to the extent they will never seek dental treatment.

Anxiety disorder is one of the fastest growing disorders in the world. The symptoms are debilitating and it tends to spread to many areas of life.

Sadly, most dentists do not understand the condition. Dentists that do are worth their weight in gold. In all the years of my practice (I am a psychologist specializing in anxiety disorder) I never had one patient referred from a dentist for this problem.

As a former phobic, I found there was little help for working with dental anxiety. I decided to work full time with this problem I have teamed up with a dentist in California and work with him directly. I also work with dentists across the country via web cam. My desire is to raise awareness of the problem and educate dentists to help work with their patients that suffer with this problem.

This site is a wonderful place for people with dental anxiety and fear. The dentists that post here are incredible. I have started to get to know some of them and they are amazing people.

If we all work together we can raise awareness of the problem and help those that suffer in silence.

Blessings

You said it Doc! The dentists who understand are absolutely gold. Moreover, because of their compassionate understanding, they literally transform the lives of any patient fortunate enough to find them.

drummerswife said:

You said it Doc! The dentists who understand are absolutely gold. Moreover, because of their compassionate understanding, they literally transform the lives of any patient fortunate enough to find them.

Click to expand...

I can certainly attest to that! Had I not found the dentist I now have, there is no way I would have ever sought treatment.

Hello Wonderful People

Terrified Woman - Congrats on day 5 of new dentures, on eating and amazingly, smiling. This is a wonderful outcome. It's over now, and you can smile at the world!

Penny

Thank you for your kindness. It's hard to believe I'm not alone with this anymore.

B.dc. I'm glad you had a successful experience.

drummerswife - "Literally transforming the life of any patient fortunate enough to find them" So true, literally. I had that for ten years, then major stressors in my dentists life changed him. The last two root canals with him left me horribly ill for weeks. It was agonizing. the accupuncturist I saw said he wouldn't see me anymore until I changed dentists. But this is a small town on a lovely island. The good dentists have closed practices. The rest are sharks.

So here I am, after a supposedly routine cleaning that broke a tooth, facing another root canal and crown. The good news is that I now know an endodontist who uses IV sedation. I *loved* my last experience that used IV. I had a previous experience with sedation that was too light and left me both hysterical and helpless, in the face of hours of dental work that I'm told should have been called off and was not. The bad news is that I can't get an appt. for this until the end of Aug. Both offices are closing for two weeks holidays. I was facing a 5 week wait with a tooth that could erupt at any time. I already know what an absess feels like and don't want to repeat the experience. Practicing mindfulness and staying in the present got me through the first days and stopped me from ending up as I did last time, with dangerous blood pressure, shaking and on the brink of something awful.

The endodontist didn't want to see me without the IV sedation - but miraculously he has agreed to an appt. that will kill the nerve before he goes away. Facing a month with no recourse has left me feeling grateful for this. The dentist somehow brought this about. He wants me to arrive an hour early, take an anti- anxiety pill, and they will observe how it affects me. I HAVE to get through this, and gracefully. It's my only chance. I have the self control to do it, but don't want to fall into that after effect nightmare.

I have been practicing Andrew Wyle's breathing exercise, by the hour. It triggers the para-sympathetic nervous system and makes me calm. I'll do an hour of this before the appt., and an hour of yoga, and an hour of fast walking along the ocean. After, I will line up some dvd's I've wanted to see and give myself the day off; maybe even a Starbuck's mocha frappuccino. That's all I can think of. I'd love to hear any of your thoughts and suggestions.

Stress Doc - Many thanks. I am a former corporate comptroller. I studied psych. and worked with abused women. My life has interest and fulfillment. And torturous experience, emotional brutality, apparently seen as brusqueness and efficiency have left me with the suffering of the damned in this area. They don't know what they are doing to people, how they are affecting us, how deep this goes. They must be closing down emotionally.

You sound unique and a social force helping on a wide scale. I'm glad to know you are out there. Your kindness is deeply appreciated. Your work is so needed.

I'm overwhelmed with the kindness of strangers. Thank you.

A miracle story of kindness, compassion and an *easy* *enjoyable** dental emergency. I was in unrelieved emotional blackness around dentistry; knew that the torturous physical and emotional effects surpassed what was ok to endure.

Staying with this miracle story - night before last my injured tooth scheduled for a root canal in 5 long weeks began that abcess kind of pain which you never forget once you've known it. I took a 292 from the last horror story last year. The pain laughed at it and got worse. I took the last one in the bottle. The pain kept on getting worse and worse. Eventually I seemed to float in an ocean of pain. There's no trying to fight that pain level. But somehow, since I was not fighting it, even in this, my spirit was somehow calm. That was almost a mystical experience.

My husband called the dentist-who-used-to-be-good befor his own life was traumatized. He didn't offer to help, but called the endodontist I am scheduled with in 5 weeks. Their pregnant assistant had been rushed to the emergency with a heart rate of 145 and their office was in panic mode. They would have taken me, even working past office hours (lovely people) but could not on that day. So-o, dentist-of-old reluctantly offered to see me. Here's where everything changes. Nobody was "managing" possible future requirements around this tooth, so I tried to. I had phoned for a prescription of lorazapam in case a cancellation came up for the root canal. I learned last time the lorazapam makes IV sedation work better (that was a heavenly experience. perfect) so I wanted some on hand, and nobody was offering. And I asked for some real painkillers in case the tooth erupted when everyone was away. Those I did not get.

I took the lorazapam. My husband, who has never done anything like this before took me down to the office. Because I was relaxed, I felt happy that this would be taken care of - and knew the freezing worked better when people are relaxed. Maybe because I was feeling ok, G. felt ok too, being there with me.

The dentist, who walls out emotion in his way, seemed to relax when he saw that I was ok. He was vehemently against drugs of any kind to help with visits, but I had the future requirement lorazapam the endodontist uses. I knew that my teeth require 2 or 3 ampules to freeze them - which he has just not not not done the last years. But I just asked quietly if I could have them so we would all have a good experience - and he smiled and said yes. And we all did have a good experience. He worked for two hours during which I was completely comfortable and even interested. I had a dental relaxation tape with me and listened to it. It worked better than ever before. I knew he was saving the situation for me, so was grateful to him and told him so. He started getting involved in helpful ways. He gave me some painkillers before I left and said he would research further and drop by as we live a few blocks away. He has been dead against prescription painkillers in the past. (Ba-ad times because of that) But he brought over a prescription that the pharmacist recognized as being used for dental pain. I curled up with some fantasy movies I rarely indulge in and loved every minute of the rest of the day. I slept like an angel last night. Today I am stunned at the miraculous transformation. The world literally seems like a different place.

You know, Stress Doc's words of kindness to me were the light in the terrible darkness of my dental world. The kind words of women who wrote me were like rain in the desert. Somehow this shifted something - both in me and in the general situation. It all seems like magic and I am delighted.

Breakthrough No. 1 !!!!!!!

I was paralyzed with fear and despair over the possibility of finding a new dentist who might actually be an OK experience. I lost my wonderful dentist to extreme stress levels in his own life. I tried to be understanding for a few years, but he became angry and frustrated with life and of course it spilled over. This knocked me back into the worst of the phobia. I really hate this.

Then - I read from Stress Doc that being trapped in fear and despair is part of the phobia package. So I considered that this might possibly not be an accurate assessment of the situation. Very helpful words. very very

And then - Brit sent some explanation around freezing and two links "Treating Anxious Patients Like Me and Can't Be Numbed? What to do" I held on to them like a drowning person; read them over and over. They eventually reassured me enough that I could read over the local dental websites yet again. And, lo and behold, there was one that sounded exactly right. Sounding good and being good are two different things, but it is encouraging. I used the self calming techniques I know - long walks, breathing exercises that trigger the parasympathetic nervous system - and I sent them an email. The next day the office called me back. The receptionist is warm and kind, didn't sound disgusted with me, and I made an appointment. From the location and their attitude I suspect they might be quite expensive, but I could make a pleasant dental experience a priority (doing without some things, extra work).

I just couldn't face more of the horrible response I've been having which left me ill and despairing for weeks after a long session - my last four procedures have been root canals and crowns - two with the old dentist, two with an endodontist I came to trust.

The first step taken! Thank you so much for the warm words, kindness and general sanity toward someone who was beginning to sink rather than swim. I am generally a sane and reasonably intelligent person outside of things dental. I'm not always a wreck. This group has been the beginning of a turning point for me. I'm celebrating taking an important step.

Barbara

Hi Barbara
Glad we could help and to reiterate for other people reading this thread, 'no it is not unreasonable to expect to be fully numbed up and out of pain for dental work'. Never stay with a dentist who thinks otherwise.


Hope the replacement dentist worked out - feel free to put them and the endo on our Dentistfinder if you like.

Hi Barbara

Well done!! You are going to beat this. You have developed a system of working through the fear. That is awesome. You are saying no to the terror and using tools that work for you. I know Dr. Weil,he is a very nice person.

The key to beating anxiety and phobias is to nurture and embrace the belief that no matter what you will face, you can handle it. All anxiety exists because of the belief that the event or situation you will face is impossible for you to deal with. This provokes the feelings of terror and the physical responses.

Once you believe that you have the skills, tools and ability to face the future the terror diminishes.

You will come through this with flying colors.

Blessings

I've met my new dentist! After overcoming my despair that there was nothing better, thanks to Stress Doc and Brit, I actually found someone who sounded like they met my needs - traumatized and extreme as they now are. His holistic visit lasted three hours all together, but it was to suss out just what I did need - so he could give it to me. What a shock that was. Today, a card from him arrived, hand written, promising the best care he can provide. He decided I needed a moderate to deep level of sedation from all the trauma and terror of the past; that my body would just burn off the freezing and trigger emotional backlash. He says he wants me to be comfortable and happy to come there.

Since I did not see any possibility of improving my horrible situation when I discovered this group, this new possibility is astonishing. Kindly and supportive understanding opened up a new door for me. I will always be grateful. I have a long appt. in a few weeks. I'll post again then.

I still feel that fear and panic is a reasonable response to having torturous pain inflicted by dentists who don't ensure numbed teeth. That is officialy torture - Amnesty International.

Stress Doc - Thank you. it is indeed Andrew Weil's breathing exercises I use. 30 - 40 minutes works for me. I increased it over several years. This gives that "Relaxation Response" - in the days preceeding appointments. I wish I could post the endodontists name, but he is so busy now that a person has to be a previous patient to book an appt. It was actually help from a friend that got me my first appt. with him.

Brit - You made all the difference.

Gratefully,

Barbara

Great news Barbara
I'm really pleased you have found a dentist you can work with. Keep us posted. Maybe it is ok then, that I have chalked up 4500 posts on here lol - it is worthwhile if it helps someone get the comfortable care they need.
Brit
PS The amazing thing is that it is often someone located across the world...the wonder of the internet indeed.

Brit - 4500 postings and changing the world one life at a time. Pls. keep on posting. This is light in the darkness.
Barbara

Hi Brit Congratulations on your large number of postings well done.



Dave.