Beyond Phobia

Hi everyone...

I am a confident person but.............. dental phobia has consumed me.
Its consumed for years and far too long.

It must have been when i was in my 20's at the dentist and he scared the hell outta me. I havent been since. My gf is telling me to go and i want to.. Not for her but for me also. I havent smiled in a very long time. I want to smile. But.. Have i told u i have dental phobia? hmm ok i did.

How do u overcome this.. I really want to go to the dentistt but my teeth are real bad and i am too scared of maybe what they would say or do or the pain.. I do realize this brave new world has moved forward and some things are less painful but my mind says other wise.

I also do realise it will cost but i need the real me back and not hide my cheshire smile as i had been told i "use" to have.

Is there something i can do to make it better?

Was told to look at pics of worse teeth than mine and see a before after picture to give me hope that it CAN be done and that it wasnt that bad at all.. I dont know.. Very confused here.

Thank you

Trev

Hi Trev, I

Hello Franca,

I appreciate your reply and thank you.

I am embaressed to say that i too had a tooth fall out and was beond embaressed and nobody even knew.

I am wanting to find a dentist like you have that i will be confortable with. I dont want to be this way anymore.

May i ask how its all going and what you have had done so far and how many visits to make you feel confident in a "smile".

I so need to forum my fears and questions.

Thank you again

Trev.

You're very welcome Trev!

Hello and welcome. Also well done for deciding to find out what you can do, it's not too late to get help. I've just completed a dental journey of my own that sounds very similar to yours, only I had avoided the dentist for 26 years.

I was ashamed at how I had allowed my teeth to get and I was determined to beat the phobia that had made me this way. I had some anxiety therapy to help me and I still cannot believe just what a difference they made. With the therapy I was able to go to a dentist, I was still very nervous and would only allow a visual inspection at the check-up, absolutely no touching. It took two appointments just to be examined but going slowly, talking openly and honestly with the dentist, allowed trust to build up and I've managed to get my mouth healthy again.

I wrote a journal on here, telling everything that happened and how I felt. It was a good way of just letting my frustrations out safely. People kindly responded and gave me support when I needed it. It was good to go back when I was feeling down about the whole process, just to see how far I had come, even though I could only take baby steps each time.

Everyone on here understands how hard this is to do, but you can do it too.

Absolutely *bleeping* myself !

I took my first step and found a local dentist. I explained my fears and the world to the nurse there. I am really dreading it tho. Really scared as to what he will think and say.

She said he uses a pen/wand thingie. I dont know what that means but...

I will be shakin more than Elvis on his prime driving there, let alone walking in.
Its booked for a Thursday...

She was very nice on the phone tho but i suppose now is the time.


Trev.

Hey Trev!
Congrats on making the appointment!
You can do this!

I'm seven months in, and it does get easier. I was paralyzed with fear for days before appointments, and I can now walk into the office by myself. I still get nervous, but I am getting better every day.

I might avoid looking at pictures. Keep focusing on you. You're getting treatment, you're doing this to make your life better.

Good luck! Let us know how it goes.

The first couple of visits are the hardest (for me, it was the initial consultation/teeth cleaning that made me very nervous and then the first treatment visit). After that, it really does get a little easier each time. You can do it!

Thank you to all !

I really appreciate all the support.. Still trembling bout going tomorrow ( Thursday ). The lady there rang up to confirm i was going.. Grrr i was so tempted to say no but she kept repeating that i done the first step in calling and now to come in...

I read about the "magic wand" the dentist uses... Does anyone have an experience in it?

Ohh gawd i will be terrified...

Thank you all ! I must say that venting in this forum has given me some strength and i really hope i get on the road to success.

I will let you all know how i go when i get back if i am still able to get myself together.

Trev

Yes 'TheWand' or any painfree delivery of local anaesthetic* is a real plus point. It means you never have to ask the 'is the pain of the injection worse than the pain of the treatment' question....you can be got numb totally comfortably so you can relax from start to finish.
Good luck.

* It is possible to do painfree anaesthetic delivery with a conventional syringe but it's all in the technique of releasing the fluid slowly so as to avoid the bee sting effect.

I went in today.

I have never felt so uncomfortable with a dentist, let alone a person.

This dentist had no personality, never smiled once, and didnt make me feel at all comfortable. This was such a terrible experience.

All he said, before he even looked at me was, are you financial?
Then was telling me how much bills were for a dentist.

He looked inside for a bit and didnt give me any confidence to do anything but remove all my top teeth cause he felt it was easier for him to do that than leave the ones that are there.. Not once he said , i assumed that he would say, we can save x amount and do this or that. No help.

Then told me to get dentures for the top and then , in his compassionate way, said i would feel uncomfortable when i have them.

He also said to go under sedation and he just make the dentures and send me to the surgeon to do it.

Am i just over reacting?

Trev.

Hi Trev.

No, you're not over reacting, keep looking, you haven't found the right dentist. I'm on my third one and it's ok. Now I realize there is an element of shooting the messenger, so to speak, especially the first to give you the bad news. But if you are uncomfortable, run. I let the first guy treat me and he further traumatized me, now I have flash backs of him making my worst fears come true.

Easier for him???? you got to be kidding. There is nothing more final than getting all your teeth out, dentally speaking, they won't grow back, you can't undo it. There must be options and you need to be told what they are in the form of various treatment plans. If you would like to save some teeth, tell the dentist that- you are in control. What are your goals? I only have 18 teeth left, I'm doing implants to replace 6, I'm not getting dentures, there are a lot of people with more teeth than I having them all extracted, If dentures are your only option because of financial's or the state of your teeth, from what I've read on here from others, the adjustment period is very difficult- you need a dentist you can work with.

You took a very big first step, but look again. Do yourself a really big favor and get another opinion- you owe it to yourself and you deserve it.

Not the dentist for you....especially if you are paying private rates rather than NHS (if you are in UK). Find another one and do not go back.

A competent dentist should always make an attempt at chitchat with patients - especially new ones...it really helps people feel more relaxed.
Congrats on going...sounds like this guy thinks his Wand makes up for reassurance and TLC lol. It does not, feeling comfortable with the person giving your care is the most important aspect of overcoming the phobia.

Is there no one on the Dentistfinder in your area?

I am in Australia.

There is only 1 listed in Melbourne and its a little too far from me.

I will have to do a few calls and "hope" to find a suitable one i hope.

Still feeling dissapointed but also want to go.

Still cant believe how cold he was and un helpfull.

Trev.