Parent not wanted

[bocapequeno]

I am a dentist and I recently noticed a new pediatric patient on my schedule with a big NOTE!!!!! icon on the computer screen. A parent called in and scheduled a child for a new consultation appointment. She told the office staff that she hates dentists, that she saw an episode on 60 minutes about children being tortured by dentists and demands to be with the child at all times. I frankly don't want to see the child because of the risk this parent might put me in without doing anything wrong. What is the best thing to tell the parent? I don't want to see the child.

[letsconnect]

Hi ,

it sounds as if this parent is nervous and afraid of dentists. Maybe she has had bad experiences in the past herself. The kindest thing to do would be to recommend a dentist nearby who is good with nervous patients, if you know of anyone.

In the UK, it is the norm for the parent to be with their child, and it it perfectly understandable that parents want to stay with their children (I do not know if you are a parent yourself). In the US, there has been a lot of controversy over so-called dental mills where children have been mistreated in sometimes horrendous ways. Parents may rightly ask "what does he/she have to hide?" when they are told that they cannot stay with their child.

If you are not confident that you can put this parent and her child at ease, then being honest about how you feel and suggesting someone who can would be the best way forward.

[brit]

I agree with Letsconnect that she has probably had bad experiences herself in the past and simply is now trying to obtain care for her child, no one can force you to see her though as you say.
Coming from the UK I fully support the parent's right to stay with their child except when they are under GA (would only be in hospital in UK).
I also support an adult's right to have a support person stay with them (even if only tucked in the corner) during a dental appointment - many posters on here comment this being denied them in the USA 'my boyfriend is not allowed back with me'.

This lady needs her own General dentist who she trusts who she can then take her child to in full confidence. In the dental mill environment she is frankly fully justified in her concern. To European eyes we can't understand why these places are not closed down or how ethical dentists could work in them. More info here if you are interested: www.dentistthemenace.com

PS My dentist sees my kids without me directly in the room but I trust him and I am within earshot, they like him, the door is open...it is a small practice.

[fullmoon]

I am a dentist and I recently noticed a new pediatric patient on my schedule with a big NOTE!!!!! icon on the computer screen. A parent called in and scheduled a child for a new consultation appointment. She told the office staff that she hates dentists, that she saw an episode on 60 minutes about children being tortured by dentists and demands to be with the child at all times. I frankly don't want to see the child because of the risk this parent might put me in without doing anything wrong. What is the best thing to tell the parent? I don't want to see the child.

What sort of risk are you referring to? Legal?

[K-Bird]

It seems that with performing dental work on children,that you would run into this quite a bit...the dentist is probably terrifying for most kids--given that most of adults can't handle it!!

Do you have time to put the mom and kid at ease by talking to them ahead of time--asking the mom what she feels comfortable with you doing on the first visit? I mean if they have to keep coming back, then more $$$ for you...
Have you offered sedation for the child? Maybe you should have a staff member call the mom back and ask if that is something she would be interested in..

At any rate, your dental assistant will be there also, so it doesnt seem the mom would have much to stand on should she accuse you of anything.

I guess the bottom line is--if you want to increase your patient volume--let the mom do what she needs to do--she will spread the word if she is pleased.

I wish my mom had been so protective of me--my dentist was that kind of vile person who I found out was later accused of child abuse.....