C
CollegeBound
Well-known member
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2014
- Messages
- 482
- Location
- Indiana, USA
Hello!
As many of us know, our imagination can do more harm than good when concerned with our phobia. If we are scared, we tend to imagine the worse-case scenario. Having someone else talk about their awful appointments just adds fuel to the fire.
I experienced this a few weeks ago while on a date with my boyfriend. He had mentioned the morning of our date that he had to go get a few fillings. He texted me while he waited 1.5 hours to be called into the exam room. (Waiting is one of the things I hate about appointments. Adds too much anxiety.) Later that evening, while out to eat, he began talking about his appointment in grave detail. Everything from the cost, to the wait, and all the way until he walked out the door. I was doing okay with his talking for a while, distracted by trying to look at the menu to see what I wanted, until he started talking about getting numb. He then describes how the shot hurt, and how he wasn't quite numb yet when the process started. He said he spent 3 hours in "the chair" and continued to describe the needles and the pain in vivid detail. (Note: Pain and needles are two of my biggest triggers. I still get physically nauseous if I think about it too much.) It got to the point where I said "I'm sorry, but I am trying to figure out what I want. This is a gross conversation for the dinner table. Can we talk about this later this evening?" Gratefully, he stopped and started on a new conversation, and the rest of the date went perfectly.
Although I have had fillings before, and my experience was pretty good minus the anxiety, I still have nightmares about dental related stuff, and I am planning on making an appointment at the beginning of October when my new insurance starts. I still have my boyfriend's story haunting my head, reminding me of what could happen. He has Asperger's, so he is more sensitive to pain than I am, but he is also no wimp. If he says something hurts, I believe him. I just don't want this to keep me from going like most horror tales I have heard in the past have. I have told him in the past that this sort of thing scares me, but I don't know if he remembers me telling him or not, and having to explain it again would be embarrassing.
Any advice on how to separate his experience from me?
As many of us know, our imagination can do more harm than good when concerned with our phobia. If we are scared, we tend to imagine the worse-case scenario. Having someone else talk about their awful appointments just adds fuel to the fire.
I experienced this a few weeks ago while on a date with my boyfriend. He had mentioned the morning of our date that he had to go get a few fillings. He texted me while he waited 1.5 hours to be called into the exam room. (Waiting is one of the things I hate about appointments. Adds too much anxiety.) Later that evening, while out to eat, he began talking about his appointment in grave detail. Everything from the cost, to the wait, and all the way until he walked out the door. I was doing okay with his talking for a while, distracted by trying to look at the menu to see what I wanted, until he started talking about getting numb. He then describes how the shot hurt, and how he wasn't quite numb yet when the process started. He said he spent 3 hours in "the chair" and continued to describe the needles and the pain in vivid detail. (Note: Pain and needles are two of my biggest triggers. I still get physically nauseous if I think about it too much.) It got to the point where I said "I'm sorry, but I am trying to figure out what I want. This is a gross conversation for the dinner table. Can we talk about this later this evening?" Gratefully, he stopped and started on a new conversation, and the rest of the date went perfectly.
Although I have had fillings before, and my experience was pretty good minus the anxiety, I still have nightmares about dental related stuff, and I am planning on making an appointment at the beginning of October when my new insurance starts. I still have my boyfriend's story haunting my head, reminding me of what could happen. He has Asperger's, so he is more sensitive to pain than I am, but he is also no wimp. If he says something hurts, I believe him. I just don't want this to keep me from going like most horror tales I have heard in the past have. I have told him in the past that this sort of thing scares me, but I don't know if he remembers me telling him or not, and having to explain it again would be embarrassing.
Any advice on how to separate his experience from me?
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