Enarete
Super Moderator
Staff member
- Joined
- Sep 18, 2017
- Messages
- 3,347
As5786.. that's so lovely, thank you very much
Got calmer again.. like always.. and like always I will get scared again soon, I know that.
This second visit is actually a first visit. The only difference will be that now I will maybe feel free enough to really cry and freak out. I was so controlled last time. I was pushing everything inside me and tried to look calm because I always do that. I wasn't even shaking - I was internally but nobody would notice. The only sign of panic was my apathy and acting disoriented. No crying, no talking, no shaking, no nervous movements. Surpressing all and trying not to move at all.
My priority for the next visit is freedom. I will go there but not going in til I reel ready. If the reception will be crowded like the last time or there will be a dentist with a mask, I will just turn away and go out for a moment and come back as soon as I feel calmer. If I feel claustrophobic or unable to stay in the waiting room, I will just go somewhere else or again out for a moment. I will express myself and say whats on my mind. Maybe it will help.
And I want to talk. I need to talk. I cannot come in and get into the chair and get done what we said I would get done. I maybe will need the whole appointment to be able to sit in the chair. I will take the time. No rushing. And I will say when I need a break and will ground myself regularly so I don't get overwhelmed.
I prepared an email with the triggers and the things that hepled and the things I was too afraid / ashamed to say last time. I will send it to the dentist next week. And I will say that I need time and some chat again. And that I would like not to get overwhelmed. And that I need to remember the appointment.
The treatment room last time was very simple. I am terrified that they put me into a room with a lot of tools and stuff the next time. I am afraid I would get a panick attack right when entering the room.
Almost two weeks.. I hate waiting..
Got calmer again.. like always.. and like always I will get scared again soon, I know that.
This second visit is actually a first visit. The only difference will be that now I will maybe feel free enough to really cry and freak out. I was so controlled last time. I was pushing everything inside me and tried to look calm because I always do that. I wasn't even shaking - I was internally but nobody would notice. The only sign of panic was my apathy and acting disoriented. No crying, no talking, no shaking, no nervous movements. Surpressing all and trying not to move at all.
My priority for the next visit is freedom. I will go there but not going in til I reel ready. If the reception will be crowded like the last time or there will be a dentist with a mask, I will just turn away and go out for a moment and come back as soon as I feel calmer. If I feel claustrophobic or unable to stay in the waiting room, I will just go somewhere else or again out for a moment. I will express myself and say whats on my mind. Maybe it will help.
And I want to talk. I need to talk. I cannot come in and get into the chair and get done what we said I would get done. I maybe will need the whole appointment to be able to sit in the chair. I will take the time. No rushing. And I will say when I need a break and will ground myself regularly so I don't get overwhelmed.
I prepared an email with the triggers and the things that hepled and the things I was too afraid / ashamed to say last time. I will send it to the dentist next week. And I will say that I need time and some chat again. And that I would like not to get overwhelmed. And that I need to remember the appointment.
The treatment room last time was very simple. I am terrified that they put me into a room with a lot of tools and stuff the next time. I am afraid I would get a panick attack right when entering the room.
Almost two weeks.. I hate waiting..