Terrified and sad

I was told a couple years ago that I need to have SO much work done. I need to have wisdom tooth extracted, cavities filled, periodontal treatments(I have gum disease!), surgery, AND braces to bring down an impacted cuspid and straighten my teeth.

For someone who fears dentists, this was way too much for me to hear when i finally got the guts to go to the dentist. Basically the dentist visit prior to that they never mentioned all of this, so I was pretty traumatized when I heard about the years worth of treatments I would need.


SO- I have been putting this off for years, and my smile is the ONLY thing holding me back looks-wise. It really takes a toll on my self esteem, but I just haven't been able to get the guts to get these things started. I just can't even make the first appointment to go back! can some one help me figure this out? I don't want to lose my teeth, I am only 26 years old and have gum disease and all these other problems, but I am so scared to do anything about it. People have made comments about my teeth behind my back and I overheard them. It makes me so upset, so why can't I just go get this started already?!

HELP!

Hello.
I know that facing the DENTIST is so hard and scary....but I know that you can do this.
The actual appointment is never as bad as we imagine it to be.
I waited to long,I am 30 years old and went to the dentist after 12 years of not going and had to get all 15 teeth on top extracted and have a denture.If I would have gone sooner the denture thing could have been avoided.

I know the things you need done seem like alot(and it is)but dentistry these days is quite capable of doing all those things faster than you might think and painless.I had 15 teeeth pulled and felt no pain during and not much after.It's amazing the things they can do these days.

each appointment will get a little easier(from my experiance anyway)
Just take it slow...but trust me once you go in there and start doing what you need to do to have a healthy,pain-frre-beautiful smile you will feel so happy and relieved and sooooooo proud of yourself.

I wasne't able to actually bite with my front teeth for years or chew without a toothache soon after...because of my fear of the dentist I leaened to live that way...unfortanatly it took 2 front crowns breaking that urged me t finally make an appointment but I did and I was scarde but all in all it wasen't that bad and now It feels so good to have those un-healthy teeth out of my mouth and tonight was the first time in 8 years I took a bite of a taco the normal way(not with a fork)

Sorry I am rambling I am just trying to say if we can do it then so can you...and you can not find a better place for the support needed to do this than this forum.You can do this and we are all here to help.

I will send positive vibes your way.

Hi there,

Welcome to the board

As I'm sure you can tell, you are far from alone here and it's great that you have opened up here and have the desire to move forward!

I know exactly how you feel (as does most everyone here).
I went to the dentist in March for the first time in five years. Prior to making that first appointment, I seriously thought that I could get away with never seeing a dentist again. Then a piece of one of my biscupids broke off and I knew that I couldn't and didn't want to put it off any longer.

I scoured the internet, looking at various local dentist's websites. I finally found one that I liked and I e-mailed them. In my e-mail, I explained how fearful I had always been of dentists and what my other concerns were. I received a very nice reply in which I was invited to tour the office and meet the dentist.

I was beyond petrified the moment I stepped into the office. However, after meeting the staff and the dentist, I felt comfortable enough to make that first appointment. They all really took the time to get to know me and my fears. It's even listed on my chart that I am a very nervous patient.

On Wednesday, I had a root canal and four fillings and I can honestly say that the worst part (aside from keeping my mouth open for that long and the cost) was that I couldn't chat

Remember, YOU are in control.
You do not have to all of that treatment completed at once or even at all if you don't want to. You can halt an appointment or a procedure when you feel uncomfortable. Your dentist should be completely understanding and respect your needs as a patient.

Also, I would urge you to get a second opinion on what needs to be done if you're unsure about any treatment plan you're presented with.

You can do this.
I used to think that my life would be perfect if I didn't have to spend so much time worrying about the state and appearance of my teeth.

I can't tell you how exciting it's been to realize that I'm making that dream become a reality.


Best wishes!!!

I agree with everything the last poster said...your priorities should be restoring your dental health which would mean doing stuff one step at a time probably by sorting the gums out first, doing the restorations(fillings)...wisdom teeth? and braces?....definitely get a second opinion on the whole lot....neither may be necessary although both may be desirable for various reasons. Just to get all decay removed and your teeth professionally cleaned so you could maintain a good oral hygiene routine would make you feel heaps better regardless of whether your smile is cosmetically perfect.
Find a dentist you like and trust..they are out there..it really is the most important element in the mix. Best wishes

Thank you for your nice replies and warm welcome.


The biggest thing is that I am moving 1500 miles away next year and I want to have the majority of the work done by then. I m just so sick of not smiling, you know? I want to go out and date as I am fairly newly single after a divorce also, so feeling like I have a nice smile and can be confident is important to me. I feel like the real me can't shine through...


The thing with getting a second opinion is that the practice I am going to (I am not crazy about them) is the only one remotely close to me that takes my insurance. I will call the insurance company and see if they have anymore since the last time I checked.


Thanks again for your great encouragement and advice. I need to do this soon!! eeeek!

I also wanted to mention that the braces are necessary because of the impacted cuspid. If I leave it for much longer it could fuse to the bone and not be able to be brought down, so time really is of the essence.;

I just feel so overwhelmed with all of this, and the fact that I am not crazy about the dental practice isn't helping.

Well ok based on one dentist's opinion (they often don't agree) that still means one thing at a time...when all the other stuff is over and done with...braces won't seem like such a big deal.
What don't you like about the current practice? Do they have another dentist you could try and be upfront about your fears so they can be more supportive? Is sedation of some kind an option so you can have a lot done in one appt and be fairly unaware of it?
Do you have any specific fears we can help you with?

Maybe you need to change your insurance so that it better matches your preferences for dental practices..will you be able to keep the same policy when you move next year?

There are other dentists there, so maybe I will talk to some of the others.

The one I currently go to just doesn't have the patience and undersanding that I am looking for.


I am scared of the whole experience in general. The pain, the length of time, the needles, the embarrasment of the fact that I let this go for so long....everything.


I can't change insurance until the new year, so I will have to see if I can work with this practice.

What do I tell them when i make an appointment? That I just didn't like my current one? I mean, they all work together in the same office...

Oh- and the main one thing that I love about the practice is that their dentists, periodontist and orthodontist are all in the same place. That is very convenient, however it is still quite a drive for me to get there.

lilea said:

Oh- and the main one thing that I love about the practice is that their dentists, periodontist and orthodontist are all in the same place. That is very convenient, however it is still quite a drive for me to get there.

Click to expand...

Try to find out which dentist there has the best reputation for kindness and understanding - do they have a website at all and then rebook afresh with them maybe...tell the receptionist if she queries it, that the chemistry wasn't quite right between you and the last one and as a very nervous patient, you need to feel comfortable on a personal level to be able to contemplate such an in-depth course of treatment. Try to arrange the first appt as just a chat and maybe a quick exam so that you further reduce pressure on yourself.

It is possible they could have a professional issue with your changing but unlikely...you are probably not the first to want to switch. Probably best to be tactfully honest about it.
Or if you prefer, book a chat appt with the same one and ask if he thinks a colleague would be better placed to help you through the treatment.
One thing's for sure, the new one will have to do their own diagnosis - they won't just want to act on what was recommended before and in any event time has passed so there could well be a difference.
Yes it would be handy having all those specialists under one roof..provided they are your cup of tea.

On pain, there shouldn't really be any these days..everything can be numbed up even just for a cleaning if you want that...some dentists don't give comfortable shots but even then you are only usually talking a slight pricking sensation and maybe a slight sting if the fluid is injected too quickly.....I can't speak from experience here as all the shots I have ever had have been comfortable....again does anyone there do sedation even if it's only nitrous?
Embarrassment should be less than last time maybe...you not going back just shows reluctance and fear on your part.
Good luck

Brit is right.

Be honest about your concerns with your current dentist.
There's nothing wrong with anything that you've said here, you're just simply not "compatible" with your current dentist. It happens all of the time

There shouldn't be any pain. I had a few shots for my root canal and they numbed me up with gel for the injections and I barely felt the injections. Just a slight pinch, if anything at all.

They offered to give me nitrous but my dentist had given me so much encouragement that I felt comfortable enough to let her proceed without it.
I didn't feel ANY of the work that I had done. It was absolutely 100% pain free!

Be proud of the progress you're making, you have no reason at all to be ashamed