• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone who is has a severe fear of the dentist or dental treatment. Please note that this is NOT a general dental problems or health anxiety forum! You can find a list of them here.

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I really think I'm the only one.

T

theonlyone

Junior member
Joined
Jun 22, 2009
Messages
2
I have never talked about this out loud (or on screen?) to anyone before. It is like the huge pink elephant in my life, something that I know everyone around me is aware of, but no one says anything. I ignore it too. I have extremely bad teeth and have always had pretty bad dental hygiene. It started with a horrible dentist experience and then just continued as a I got older because of self esteem and neglect issues. I would say at least half of my teeth are either missing pieces or completely gone. I haven't been to the dentist since I was a sophomore in high school, I am now 26. At this point I am tired of the negligence and I want to start moving forward on getting this problem taken care of. I just don't know where to go from here I guess. I do have a job that has dental insurance, but I know that it won't cover a fraction of the attention that I need. I also get sick to my stomach at the thought of having someone examine my mouth. I am so ashamed and embarrassed at letting it get this far. The appearance of my teeth is 100% effecting pretty much every aspect of my life. I know what I have to and what I need to do, but I just feel like I'm frozen and I'm destined to live an unhappy life because I have gotten myself into such a horrible mess.
I am sorry if this is long and rambling and sounds like a pity party, I have just never really expressed any of these feelings out :hidesbehindsofa:loud before.
 
HEY! Don't beat yourself up over it, you have mustered up the courage to take the bull by the horns, be proud of that!

As I have learned on here in the past few days there are many new ways to have serious dentistry done for people who have Dental Phobia. Much like yourself I am terrified of the dentist, but I learned that they have measures now that make it so you don't feel ANYTHING when having procedures done! There are measures you can take to make sure that you are comfortable and calm while the dentists works on your mouth.

Don't be embarrassed! Look for a nice dentist in your area who can cater to your needs and everything will end up alright :) Best of luck to you!
 
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You are definitely not the only one. I never discussed my dental phobia with ANYONE until I actually started to confront it and deal with it to a point. Now I still find it difficult to talk about, but once I faced it and started getting treatment I felt more able to talk about it. This forum is a great place to start writing your feelings down, and I definitely recommend starting a journal so you can just write about it whenever you want.
 
hey :welcome:
you are in no way the only one you never are what you fear we all fear on here so yr definately in the right place!!!!
i think you seem to be worrying too far ahead of yrself something im an expert at!!
dont think about everything that needs doing in one go think about it in small steps. step 1 would be to find a nice dentist who perhaps you could just have a talk too. Then move on from there maybe give yrself a break for a week or so then go back and see if you can let the dentist have a brief look so then he can tell you what the first step in yr treatment needs to be.
Its almost never as bad as it seems to you i thought every tooth in my mouth needed removing but i had 4 teeth out which were unsavable and 6 fillings all white ones i did it all at my pace with a kind and very understanding dentist thats the most important thing if you dont trust the dentist you cant hope to get yr work done you need to trust the dentist wont hurt you.
all the best
emma
 
:XXLhug: Hug, not alone at all. :grouphug:All virtually here for you, too. For 3 years I refrained from mentioning to anyone (the last 2 of those 3 even seeing the dentist :( that it was my extreme fear of needles that was preventing me from getting a small cavity filled. I don't think I was a dental phobic just lol a needle one and that festered long enough to make it easy to consciously "forget" about what needed to be done. I've never done that before. I found this this wonderfully supportive forum and made it through the dental work that needed to be done including anasthetics shots which for the most part thanks to the numbing gel where nothing like I had feared at all.

Fear really is a :devilish:but you took it as Apromollo said by his literal red horns. This is a great place and with the right, compassionate dentist, treatment should and will be painfree and leave you feeling :cloud9:.

Mona
 
:welcome:to our community here. And, like others have posted here, you are absolutely not alone. I neglected my teeth for far too many years because my terror of dentists was so intense even the mention of it was enough to bring on an anxiety attack.
As someone else said, dont beat yourself up. we've all been there. And you have defintely come to the right place for support in your journey.
Blessings to you:)
 
Hi,
Il agree with everyone else that posted...you are not alone! I too neglected my dental health for so long and just this past March have begun to get things back in order. Do not beat yourself up over it but celebrate the fact that you made the first bi step of talking about it. Little steps lead to big rewards :)
 
Olivacs has the key right there. Small steps at a time will lead you to big accomplishments. Thats the way its been for me. One small step at a time. When the dentist was able to sedate me enough to make it possible to do an evaulation of my teeth, it was quickly evident that the years of neglect had taken its toll and there was a lot of work to be done.
My recommendation is dont look at the big picture. Concentrate on taking one small step at a time. Like Olivacs said so well, little steps lead to big accomplisgments.
On July 2nd, I wil have my last appointment with my dentist. My treatment plan,which began months ago, for the restortive work on my teeth will be completed. My dentist has been in practice for many years and told me I am the most frightened patient she has ever worked with.
YOU CAN DI IT!! :)
 
You are definitely not the only one. I reckon virtually everyone who visits this site feels the same. Even my husband didn't know the extent of my dental phobia until I chipped a tooth and had to face up to my phobia. Talk about it as much as you can, on this site and to anyone you trust - it does help - I promise.

The worse part of it is facing up to having the phobia. Once you've done that, I truly believe you are 75% of the way there.

Very best of luck - you can do it!
 
Well said, jenjen. And you are so right. And I think a big part of facing the fear is connecting to the right dentist.
 
Thanks for all the positive feedback, guys. It feels good (and a little strange, tbh) to have so many people that have the same feelings as me when this is something that I have never talked about before. I did make an appointment for next week, but I am already wanting to cancel it. Partly because I'm terrified and partly because they are going to charge me $300 just for an examination. Is this necessary or is it possible for me to find a dentist that will do a free consultation? Also, for the people that have needed extensive dental work, do you have any suggestions on payment options? Thanks so much guys!
 
It depends what country you are in and also what is included in the consultation. If the consultation includes x-rays, it's always more expensive. Dentists do vary though so it's definitely worth shopping around. Then again, the cheapest option might not necessarily be the best fit. Good luck in your search :)
 
your story sounds very similar to mine, i am 21 now and just started what i thought would be a very horrible journey of constant dentist visits to sort out my horrible teethl, but they werent as bad as i thought! i thought i had the worst teeth in the world, but apart from 3 treatments that are serious, the rest is apparently very easy and quick to repair! I suffered in silence for 6 years after a bad experience, untill i was forced to visit the emergency clinic with an abcess i just couldnt hide any more (partly the pain and mostly the massive swelling i got! i pray that doesnt happen to you).. i was so terrified but it was either go to the dentist or end up in hospital! i had been so ignorant of my health due to the fear for so long but i couldnt hide any longer and today i had my first root canal treatment finished! If i can do it, seriously anyone can, and now im even looking forward to going back to get everything sorted out so i can smile again without having to hide behind my hands. Dont be a prisoner in your own body, you deserve to be healthy and happy and you're doing the right thing by making that first step! I was lucky enough to be able to afford the treatment without too much stress, but i think it was still worth the money seeing as i feel so much happier now!

good luck :yay:
 
I agree with Jessica. The cost of dental care varies widely depending on where you live and whether or not you have insurance. Connecting to the right dentist that you feel comfortable with is also of key importance. The option best for you and your needs may or may not be the least expensive. The dentist I see specializes in working with people with dental phobia and has special training in the use of oral sedatives so she is more expensive than a traditional dentist but she is worth every penny.
I live in the US and here the cost of dental services are often covered through dental insurance plans offered by employers though not all employers offer this and, even when they do, coverage varies. We also have, in most states, programs paid for with state funds which provide dental care to people who do not have insurance. I have been greatly blessed to have some fairly good coverage through my husband's employer which, though it has covered the entire cost of the work I have needed, it has greatly reduced the financial burden on us.
I wish you all the best in finding what works for you.:)
 
Thanks for all the positive feedback, guys. It feels good (and a little strange, tbh) to have so many people that have the same feelings as me when this is something that I have never talked about before. I did make an appointment for next week, but I am already wanting to cancel it. Partly because I'm terrified and partly because they are going to charge me $300 just for an examination. Is this necessary or is it possible for me to find a dentist that will do a free consultation? Also, for the people that have needed extensive dental work, do you have any suggestions on payment options? Thanks so much guys!


Sometimes, there's no such thing as a 'free lunch'...cosmetic dentists often offer free consultations but you pay somewhere along the line if you go ahead with treatment in higher fees and/or they are likely to draw up an extensive treatment plan involving cosmetic options which may not be necessary at all to restore dental health.
One advantage of a free consult is that you get to meet the dentist before shelling out any money but often they will charge for x-rays.
Have you researched this dentist sufficiently to think that $300 down the drain is a good risk i.e. have they been recommended so that you know you are likely to want to go ahead with care with them? Or were they a stab in the dark?
If you are in the USA care credit can be a good option for paying for dental treatment. You could look up Droogle reviews for your area which may give you an idea whether or not they are a good bet or whether you should cancel and try elsewhere first.
 
I am in this same boat too. As a child, I had a wonderful dentist. Then we moved and had to changed dentists. That dentist was a nightmare. Pain from fillings and other dental work. As an adult, I changed to a different dentist and it didn't get much better. My phobia has gotten out of control. This last week, I decided to face the phobia and with the help of my husband booked an appointment to see a sedation dentist near us. He is even going with me.
This forum has helped me with my phobia. I will let you know how the appointment goes on Wed.
 
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