• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone who is has a severe fear of the dentist or dental treatment. Please note that this is NOT a general dental problems or health anxiety forum! You can find a list of them here.

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1st Dentist Appt Next Week in 20 years



Junior member
Mar 21, 2022
Hi, I'm new to this forum and I'm so glad to have found a place I could voice my fears in. I have not been to the dentist in such a long time. I'm in my early 30s and I stopped going to the dentist at a young age because my parents felt like dental insurance was costly. As a child, my mom would sometimes sit us down and clean our teeth but she is definitely not a professional. Eventually she stopped altogether and from that point on my siblings and I had many issues with oral hygiene. Money was tight so we were terrified of letting them know we needed dental work.

By the time I was in my early 20s, I had numerous cavities. I couldn't afford to do anything about it. I brush, floss, and use the water pick but all the long-standing oral issues have only gotten worse over time. I've lost some teeth at this point. I am so afraid of going to the dentist because of financial reasons as well as being terrified of finding out how bad my teeth are now. I think about my teeth often enough to have nightmares where all my teeth fall out.

Currently, I have dental insurance through my husband. He has been nagging for us to go. I've hid my feelings regarding my teeth to him. I'm sure he has a general idea of my fear since I've delayed making any appointment on my own for years without his insistence. He reminded me again today and I finally booked appointments.

I keep asking myself, "How can we plan for children when I can't even take care of my own teeth?" I feel so ashamed of my smile. I'm embarrassed to write this but I just have to vent. I want to stop blaming my parents for the status of my teeth and take control. I just feel so much anxiety.
Firstly you have insurance so money is no longer a issue .

Secondly your teeth may not be as bad as you expect so just go to check up and go from there . Good luck
Thank you @Jackieallen . Money isn't exactly an issue anymore but it is still very expensive and unlikely that I can get everything I need done as of yet.

I went to the dentist today and I cried while speaking to the dental hygienist. Honestly, my anxiety was at an all time high. I was terrified of finding out about the status of my teeth. However, the staff there were amazing and definitely handled me with so much kindness and care. I had my x-rays taken, teeth cleaned, and a treatment plan in place.

I need to do resin-infiltrations on 3 teeth, oral surgery to remove 2 teeth, 3 root canals, and eventually bridges to replace some teeth. I feel so much relief to know what is wrong and that I have a treatment plan in place that I can tackle.

The upside is that I thought I had cavities on my front teeth but it was just tartar. All my front teeth are in good shape. I can even keep my wisdom teeth as they are not problematic to my other teeth and are fine.

If anyone has reservations and is scared to go to the dentist then please just go. Don't wait like I did. I just wish I had gotten better dental insurance for this year.
Whoop woo you took the first step . I sure the most imporant issue can be dealt with first maybe some can wait till you renew your cover and increase it. I am glad your feeling positive . Sometimes extractions can wait if in no pain. I have one that has last a extra 4 years now .
@Jackieallen Thank you. I was thinking the same thing. I will hold off on major procedures until I can get better coverage.
Congratulations on making an appointment & following through with going to the appointment. I know it’s scary (but we always make it out to be a bigger/scarier deal in our mind, huh?) I’m glad you’ve found a great practice and that you have a plan in place! I think that’s the hardest part. ?