• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone who is has a severe fear of the dentist or dental treatment. Please note that this is NOT a general dental problems or health anxiety forum! You can find a list of them here.

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24 and never been to the dentist



Junior member
Nov 30, 2021
Like the title says, I'm 24 and never been to the dentist. My parents were terrified of the appointments and they never went with their own issues, so they never went with me either. Then when I was legally able to go I just didn't care enough since I never had any teeth issues. Then I got depressed, had really bad anxiety problems and when the problems started I wasn't brave enough to go. I've been wanting to go for years now but I'm always too scared and too embarrassed.
My teeth are in terrible shape. I have one black spot on a molar and that tooth hurts a little, other than that I have a giant problem with tartar and my gums are the main issue, they are bleeding and keep itching and it's probably because of an infection from all that tartar. My wisdom teeth are a mess too. I need to have so much done but I'm scared of a) the dentist judging me (which I can't blame them for cause who the hell neglects their teeth like me?) b) the things they are going to do to me since I never experienced anything like that so I have no idea what to do on that chair c) my gag reflex, what if it's too bad and I will not be able to let them do anything? how embarrassing would that be? d) the cost will probably be astronomical. Also if they clean all that tartar from my teeth won't they loosen up and fall out?

I know I need to go, I already found a dentist and I think I'm going to email them first to let them know of my situation. Is that a good idea or should I just register? I'm so scared. Please help :(
Just email them and explain your situation! Its not super necessary to do so but itll probably ease your fears. The dentist isnt going to judge you. They LOVE fixing teeth. You can ask that they explain everything to you…though the first appointment (at least here in the states) is xrays, then they examine your mouth and go over a plan for your teeth. There are options for sedation dentistry and that will help ease any fears. My gag reflex is bad..but i found a dentist who is so gentle. I just have to get iv sedation for an extraction for a back molar because i just GAG whenever they try to numb that tooth.
I know I need to go, I already found a dentist and I think I'm going to email them first to let them know of my situation. Is that a good idea or should I just register? I'm so scared. Please help :(

That is a great idea! The more they know about your situation and your fears, the better they'll be able to help ?. We have some forms and questionnaires on this website which you could email to potential dentists, but they're in English only so they may not be much use to you:

As @Kalyse said, dentists love fixing things, and most dentists nowadays are very aware that judging people or telling them off will lose them their customers and their reputation.

Well done for taking the first step - please let us know how you get on if you decide to email them! Best of luck ??!!
I have a terrible gag reflex too, but it hasn’t affected dental work yet for me! Definitely let your dentist know of all your concerns. If you can afford it, sedation dentistry is available too.
Hi Amante :welcome:

I was in a similar situation to you, I had only been to a dentist once or twice as a child as my mum (single parent) is terrified of dentists too.

Definitely email them and even if you just say you're nervous, they will understand. When I had my first appointment with my current dentist, I had mentioned briefly in an email before my first visit that I was nervous and they were very sympathetic when I explained I was nervous due not going when I was a child and not knowing what to expect. They will understand.

Good luck! :clover: