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29 and not been to the dentist for 12 years... appt booked

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chez0607

Junior member
Joined
Oct 20, 2020
Messages
8
Location
uk
Hi guys,

I've been lurking on this forum for the past few days and it has comforted me somewhat so thought I would post a thread. I'm 29 years old and haven't been to the dentist for 12 years because I am absolutely petrified. Just the smell and the colours of the masks and sight of the chair is enough to make me feel physically sick.

I've got an appointment booked for my first check up in two weeks time and I'm so anxious and stressed out about it. It's the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing I think about before I (try to) sleep 😥 I've done some Google searching and found a dentist near me who specialises in nervous patients so at least that's a positive.

I feel like I need so much doing to my teeth (lots of fillings and potential wisdom teeth removal) and I'm terrified of the diagnosis and dealing with all the treatment. At this point in time, I'm mostly worried about the dentist using the explorer and sticking it in cavities and parts of my teeth that will hurt me. Also terrified about the inevitable appointment with the hygienist I'm going to need.

I have dark black lines on the biting surfaces of all my molars (some thicker than others) - does this always mean it is decay?

Sorry for the rant! So scared and hoping to find some support here to get me through it.

😟😟😟


😟😟
 
T

Thephilsblogbar

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 23, 2015
Messages
730
Location
United Kingdom
Goofd luck, tell the dentist assistant and the dentist you are seeing that you are petrified.
 
F

frostgirl

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 9, 2014
Messages
319
Location
UK
Hey chez0607, well done on making an appointment! It's a big first step, so well done!

Is it the idea of the diagnosis and needing treatment that scares you?

When you meet the dentist, especially if they specialise in nervous patients, they'll have a chat with you first and you could ask if you could not sit in the chair straight away if that makes you more nervous. Try to explain what worries you and makes you nervous. If the thought of them using the explorer worries you, you could always ask beforehand that they not use it at that appointment or to be extra gentle. I was a bit worried about that too, but my current dentist showed me it before he used it and explained that they would just gently touch my tooth with it.

There is lots of supportive people on here, but again, well done on making the first step. Keep us posted :)
 
C

chez0607

Junior member
Joined
Oct 20, 2020
Messages
8
Location
uk
Hey frostgirl! Thank you for replying to me :)

Yes! It's the prospect of being sat in the chair having build up the courage to actually go for a check up after so long to then be told how bad my teeth are and be petrified all over again because of all the treatment I will need. Then comes the weeks/months of anxiety and sleepless nights over all those appointments!!

I've been doing a lot of Googling and self diagnosis too which I know is ridiculous but just can't help it!!

So frustrated with myself. Wish I had just looked after my teeth better over the years and then I wouldn't be in this situation :mad:
 
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frostgirl

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 9, 2014
Messages
319
Location
UK
I completely understand about having to build up the courage to go for a check up. I signed up for this site in 2014 but it took me until 2017 to make my first appointment with a dentist in 15ish years. It then took me nearly two years to go to another dentist. I too worry about the thought of needing treatment, and thinking my teeth are worse than they are. I still do. My journal on here is full of posts from me panicking thinking something is wrong.

When's the appointment booked for?
 
Enarete

Enarete

Super Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Sep 18, 2017
Messages
2,841
I have dark black lines on the biting surfaces of all my molars (some thicker than others) - does this always mean it is decay?
Hi chez0607 :welcome:,

just wanted to say very well done on making an appointment. Honestly, being a complete mess beforehand is a part of the package and we all have been through this.

To address your question above: No. Dark black lines on the biting surfaces do not have to be decay. I have a lot of them and it never was an issue.

Also, many people find the explorer scary so that the most dentists do the first look only with a mirror. You seem to have had bad experiences with it, but it really is not there to poke in cavities and elicit pain. Hell no. But I know there have been nasty dentists in the past who did exactly that. Anyway, as frostgirl said, just let them know what worries you so that they can find a way around it.

All the best wishes
 
M

MumOfBoys1985

Member
Joined
Sep 4, 2020
Messages
80
Location
Uk
Hello and welcome!!!
Everything you describe are completely normal thoughts and feelings. Its often the build up and the fear of the unknown that are the worst thing. Remember, its never as bad as you think its going to be. Its so easy to convince yourself you'll need huge amounts of really expensive treatment which will be awfully painful and horrible. In reality, it won't be.

It will definitely help you to warn the dentist you're feeling really anxious so they know to tread carefully and take a little more time. As my dentist knows how agitated I get, she now allows more time and carefully explains it to me. She doesnt use complicated lingo, she explains it gently in a way I can understand. I recently needed a small amount of treatment and we agreed beforehand what the limit was, that I preferred her to make a decision in my Best interest but that she wasn't to extract anything without talking to me first etc. I think during treatment it's important to set the rules first and the dentist should fully support you and be guided by you.

Try not to Google (if only I could practice what I preach huh? 😂) , it really does make it worse. I have found everyone on here to be super helpful, kind and encouraging so keep posting here as you'll definitely get alot of support from people who do and have felt the same way as you.

I mean it when I say though, well done and you're going to be fine!!
 
C

chez0607

Junior member
Joined
Oct 20, 2020
Messages
8
Location
uk
Hi everyone,

Thank you so much for all of your replies - I can't tell you how much better it makes me feel knowing that there are people out there who understand exactly how I'm feeling. This forum has already been such a huge help to me in coping with the anxiety even just that little bit more.

Since I haven't been to the dentist for so long, hoping dentistry has come a long way. I see a lot of people now saying procedures are mostly painless - fingers crossed!!!

Will keep you posted and thank you again for the support!
 
C

chez0607

Junior member
Joined
Oct 20, 2020
Messages
8
Location
uk
Oh guys! I'm struggling today because my anxiety is through the roof. I keep looking in my mouth with a torch and mirror and spotting new things. Think I'm going to need something doing to almost every single tooth. I feel so sick and like I could just burst into tears all the time I'm so stressed out about my appointment on Monday 😥

Trying to tell myself what will be will be and that I will just have to deal with what comes my way but I can't even eat I feel that anxious these past couple of days.
 
F

frostgirl

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 9, 2014
Messages
319
Location
UK
Oh I do understand where you're coming from. I have to remind myself not to look at my teeth too much otherwise I obsess and worry over everything.

Please try to hang in there, is there anything you can focus your mind on to try and take your mind off Monday?

Please do try to eat something, it will help you feel a bit better.
 
C

chez0607

Junior member
Joined
Oct 20, 2020
Messages
8
Location
uk
Hi everyone,

Just thought I would do a little update about how I got on because I always find these posts really helpful when I've been trawling and looking for support/reassurance!

Just had my first check up in 12 years and I survived! I was expecting terrible news and it wasn't great but the dentist was so lovely with me that I felt more at ease than I ever imagined possible. He said my gums were pretty healthy considering and that I need 6 fillings in between my molars (one of which is an old filling to be replaced). I know 6 fillings isn't great news but it's a lot better than I thought to be honest.

For anybody else feeling anxious about a check up after such a long time, I hope you can take some relief in knowing that if I can do it, you can too!!

roll on having all these fillings finished! 😨
 
T

thisisme

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2012
Messages
312
Hi guys,

I've been lurking on this forum for the past few days and it has comforted me somewhat so thought I would post a thread. I'm 29 years old and haven't been to the dentist for 12 years because I am absolutely petrified. Just the smell and the colours of the masks and sight of the chair is enough to make me feel physically sick.

I've got an appointment booked for my first check up in two weeks time and I'm so anxious and stressed out about it. It's the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing I think about before I (try to) sleep 😥 I've done some Google searching and found a dentist near me who specialises in nervous patients so at least that's a positive.

I feel like I need so much doing to my teeth (lots of fillings and potential wisdom teeth removal) and I'm terrified of the diagnosis and dealing with all the treatment. At this point in time, I'm mostly worried about the dentist using the explorer and sticking it in cavities and parts of my teeth that will hurt me. Also terrified about the inevitable appointment with the hygienist I'm going to need.

I have dark black lines on the biting surfaces of all my molars (some thicker than others) - does this always mean it is decay?

Sorry for the rant! So scared and hoping to find some support here to get me through it.

😟😟😟


😟😟
Welcome to the chez0607. You’re in good hands. All your fears were my fears just over a year ago when I had my first appointment in 17 years. I was 31 at the time, so close to your age. It is scary but I think you’ll find a lot of things you remember are much different than your last appointment. The smell was not what I remembered... it was so much better. I remembered the dentist jabbing the explorer into my teeth when I was younger, but it wasn’t like that at all this time. The technology is much better and even if he/she uses it, it was much more gentle than I remember. We’re all for you. Try not to jump to too many conclusions and take it one step at a time. Congrats on making an appointment!
 
T

thisisme

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2012
Messages
312
Hi everyone,

Just thought I would do a little update about how I got on because I always find these posts really helpful when I've been trawling and looking for support/reassurance!

Just had my first check up in 12 years and I survived! I was expecting terrible news and it wasn't great but the dentist was so lovely with me that I felt more at ease than I ever imagined possible. He said my gums were pretty healthy considering and that I need 6 fillings in between my molars (one of which is an old filling to be replaced). I know 6 fillings isn't great news but it's a lot better than I thought to be honest.

For anybody else feeling anxious about a check up after such a long time, I hope you can take some relief in knowing that if I can do it, you can too!!

roll on having all these fillings finished! 😨
Just seeing the update. Congrats!!
 
Enarete

Enarete

Super Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Sep 18, 2017
Messages
2,841
Hi everyone,

Just thought I would do a little update about how I got on because I always find these posts really helpful when I've been trawling and looking for support/reassurance!

Just had my first check up in 12 years and I survived! I was expecting terrible news and it wasn't great but the dentist was so lovely with me that I felt more at ease than I ever imagined possible. He said my gums were pretty healthy considering and that I need 6 fillings in between my molars (one of which is an old filling to be replaced). I know 6 fillings isn't great news but it's a lot better than I thought to be honest.

For anybody else feeling anxious about a check up after such a long time, I hope you can take some relief in knowing that if I can do it, you can too!!

roll on having all these fillings finished! 😨
Fantastic update, thank you for coming back and letting us know! :) Give yourself a huge pat on your back, you did great! 6 fillings in not much at all, compared to your believing every tooth would need something! That's great.

If you are like most people, you may struggle with some anxiety before your next appointment so if this is the case, feel free to post. For now enjoy your day and again, please give yourself a pat on the back. You did a great job!:grouphug:
 
C

chez0607

Junior member
Joined
Oct 20, 2020
Messages
8
Location
uk
Thank you everyone! I'm sure I'll be back with some major jitters before my next appointments!
 
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