B
biniche
Junior member
- Joined
- Jan 3, 2023
- Messages
- 2
- Location
- Europa
I'm a 36-year old woman and I haven't been to the dentist in about eight years because of a lot of contributing factors aside my absolute stupidity, which I will explain. I just want to mention first that I am so ashamed and so terrified of what is going to happen to my teeth, I haven't eaten in four days and I cry all the time.
When I was twelve, I had braces for six years which had some hand in my gums around my middle front teeth disappearing quite a bit. Calculus forms there quite easily. Twelve years after they were removed, because my wisdom teeth came in which pushed my other teeth forwards again, my overbite was perhaps even worse than it had been before.
I had just moved to a new city, and where I live, finding a dentist to take you on if you are not already a regular with them, is almost impossible, so I was very happy when I did find one and went to see her (at this point I had still been going to the dentist fairly regularly) and her consults were excrutiating. Cleaning my teeth hurt a lot on those two front teeth, which I tried to communicate. Her response was: "you should have cleaned better then." She did a root canal and I had to ask her three times to give me more of the anaesthetic, because I could still feel everything. Every session she would berate me for poor dental hygiene. I always felt so humiliated, I always left in damn near tears.
After that, the idea of going back to face this woman, cripples me with fear. (Finding a new dentist that would take me in is near impossible.) In the last eight years that I have stayed away from the dentist, I have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, and though it wasn't always easy, I kept up my fairly strict dental routine. I hadn't felt any pain, so I - like the idiot I am - assumed everything was still kind of okay, mostly in the hopes I would never have to see this awful woman that made me feel like a complete piece of garbage again. (BPD makes those bad interactions into the worst thing tbat could possibly happen to me.)
Last week though, my salivary glands became inflamed and swollen. Looking at them, I got a good look at those two lower front teeth and I have been having panic attacks since. The gums on the outside/front on the teeth has worn away almost completely down to the inside of my bottom lip. On each tooth, there's a little rock of calculus at the bottom. There's still some gums in between them, though. What really worries me is the inside. There's no gums left between them or underneath them. It's all calculus.There 's also a wound there that my tongue moves over when I eat and it hurts and tastes weird sometimes, but it's not blood. The teeth kind of move when I try to move them with my fingers, but I cannot move them with my tongue. I might with my upper front teeth. I do take decent care of my teeth, though, aside from being such an idiot for not going to the dentist. I brush twice a day (upped to four now though, because I am scared to death even more calculus will form) for at least two minutes, I use mouth wash and floss regularly.
I hate myself so so much for not mustering up the courage to go to the dentist sooner. The earliest I could schedule an appointment is in three weeks - if I have to live with these panic attacks and not eat out of fear my tooth will fall out, there will be nothing left of me. I cry all the time, and am constantly scouring the internet for answers. I took a year off from my job this year so I could go back to uni. Exams are in two weeks and I haven't studied properly in the past five days. I will fail my exams like this.
I don't know what to do. I am deathly terrified of getting even more hour-long scolding sessions, but I am also horrifyingly convinced my teeth might fall out even if I breathe too hard and that they won't be able to fix it. And who knows what else they'll find iny mouth.
I just wish they could knock me out and do what needed to be done, so I wouldn't have to interact with anyone about this. I am so ashamed and terrified.
Will I lose my teeth over this??
If anyone could offer some advice or support, or a similar story to let me know I am not alone, I would be so incredibly grateful. Thank you so much.
When I was twelve, I had braces for six years which had some hand in my gums around my middle front teeth disappearing quite a bit. Calculus forms there quite easily. Twelve years after they were removed, because my wisdom teeth came in which pushed my other teeth forwards again, my overbite was perhaps even worse than it had been before.
I had just moved to a new city, and where I live, finding a dentist to take you on if you are not already a regular with them, is almost impossible, so I was very happy when I did find one and went to see her (at this point I had still been going to the dentist fairly regularly) and her consults were excrutiating. Cleaning my teeth hurt a lot on those two front teeth, which I tried to communicate. Her response was: "you should have cleaned better then." She did a root canal and I had to ask her three times to give me more of the anaesthetic, because I could still feel everything. Every session she would berate me for poor dental hygiene. I always felt so humiliated, I always left in damn near tears.
After that, the idea of going back to face this woman, cripples me with fear. (Finding a new dentist that would take me in is near impossible.) In the last eight years that I have stayed away from the dentist, I have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, and though it wasn't always easy, I kept up my fairly strict dental routine. I hadn't felt any pain, so I - like the idiot I am - assumed everything was still kind of okay, mostly in the hopes I would never have to see this awful woman that made me feel like a complete piece of garbage again. (BPD makes those bad interactions into the worst thing tbat could possibly happen to me.)
Last week though, my salivary glands became inflamed and swollen. Looking at them, I got a good look at those two lower front teeth and I have been having panic attacks since. The gums on the outside/front on the teeth has worn away almost completely down to the inside of my bottom lip. On each tooth, there's a little rock of calculus at the bottom. There's still some gums in between them, though. What really worries me is the inside. There's no gums left between them or underneath them. It's all calculus.There 's also a wound there that my tongue moves over when I eat and it hurts and tastes weird sometimes, but it's not blood. The teeth kind of move when I try to move them with my fingers, but I cannot move them with my tongue. I might with my upper front teeth. I do take decent care of my teeth, though, aside from being such an idiot for not going to the dentist. I brush twice a day (upped to four now though, because I am scared to death even more calculus will form) for at least two minutes, I use mouth wash and floss regularly.
I hate myself so so much for not mustering up the courage to go to the dentist sooner. The earliest I could schedule an appointment is in three weeks - if I have to live with these panic attacks and not eat out of fear my tooth will fall out, there will be nothing left of me. I cry all the time, and am constantly scouring the internet for answers. I took a year off from my job this year so I could go back to uni. Exams are in two weeks and I haven't studied properly in the past five days. I will fail my exams like this.
I don't know what to do. I am deathly terrified of getting even more hour-long scolding sessions, but I am also horrifyingly convinced my teeth might fall out even if I breathe too hard and that they won't be able to fix it. And who knows what else they'll find iny mouth.
I just wish they could knock me out and do what needed to be done, so I wouldn't have to interact with anyone about this. I am so ashamed and terrified.
Will I lose my teeth over this??
If anyone could offer some advice or support, or a similar story to let me know I am not alone, I would be so incredibly grateful. Thank you so much.
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