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9 teeth need to be fixed and I’m feelin hopeless

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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
Well I’m just posting cuz I feel helpless. I have work (fillings) be done on 9 teeth, hopefully over 4 or 5 appts. My first one is this coming Monday and I’m terrified. My dentist doesn’t offer nitrous or iv sedation but I can take some lorazepam before I go to calm me down. I’m terrified to not get fully numb as it has happened in the past.

just feel like it will never get better because I have work to be done in all four quadrants of my mouth. Some teeth need multiple fillings and I have no idea how I will get through it all.

should I go to a new dental clinic that offers nitrous and Iv sedation so I don’t work myself up so badly every time I have to go to the dentist?

I really want to get all my work done this year. I want to be better and take better care of my teeth but it feels very very very hopeless.
 
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DDK

Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2020
Messages
22
Location
U.S.
I think it is awesome that you made the first step and got an appt. Fillings are usually pain free. I always have them test the area to make sure I cant feel anything.. if I feel anything.. I ask for more numbing.

I cant handle more than one side of my mouth being numb. If I have a couple of teeth on one side, I get them all done at the same time.

The anxiety for me is ridiculous.. but I tell myself it is getting fixed and it will be over before I know it.

Let us know how it goes after your appointment.
 
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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
Thanks DDK. I’m really trying to keep my anxiety under control but it’s hard. Keep getting stuck in thought loops about the dentist. I might talk to him and get him to refer me for sedation to get all the work done so I don’t torture myself. The thing is I feel guilty for asking to go elsewhere, like he is losing money by me going to another clinic. I dunno. The mind plays crazy tricks sometimes so I’m trying to focus on gratitude. Like the fact that I have dental insurance and access to great care.
 
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MountainMama

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 1, 2018
Messages
2,467
I think you need to do what is best for you, and your dentist should understand.
I have difficulty getting and staying numb. My previous dentist did not offer nitrous but he was great about checking for numbness by poking at my gums after the shots and then if I felt anything he would give another shot. He also stopped during treatment if I indicated pain at all.
I would go to the oral surgeon for anything more complex, like an extraction, as they offered nitrous. I did have to have a tooth extracted at the dentist once and I took lorazepam before. It helped quite a bit, as the pain reason anesthetic didn’t work well for me was probably because my pulse was racing and running it through my body so quickly. Being calmer helped it work better and I didn’t feel anything.
 
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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
I’m really hoping that it will kick in for me too. I’m planning to take 2 mg to get me through my hour long appt. positive thinking!! Thank you for the replies, guys. I can’t tell you how much peace it brings me to know others are out there that panic about the dentist too.
 
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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
Feelin hopeless again today. Like my teeth are the worst and will break down anyways even if I get all my fillings so what’s the point? I’m so stuck and I don’t know how to feel better. Can anyone help me figure out how to calm down? My appt isn’t for 4 days but I’ve fallen down an anxiety hole for the past 3 days. :( I don’t know why this gets to me so bad and I get so worked up.
 
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Poet

Junior member
Joined
Dec 21, 2020
Messages
19
Location
London
Feelin hopeless again today. Like my teeth are the worst and will break down anyways even if I get all my fillings so what’s the point? I’m so stuck and I don’t know how to feel better. Can anyone help me figure out how to calm down? My appt isn’t for 4 days but I’ve fallen down an anxiety hole for the past 3 days. :( I don’t know why this gets to me so bad and I get so worked up.
Oh you have made me feel so much better about my treatment and teeth. You've got this. Let's keep chatting and get through together. I've realised I'm never going to have perfect teeth or a Hollywood smile, but functional and pain free is just as important. You're doing great. Keep going.
 
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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
Thanks Poet, I think it will really help me get through the next few days leading up to my appt. I know I have to go, to get a broken tooth fixed... but I keep catastrophizing thinking he will have to pull it or it’s not fixable Then start freaking about all the rest of the work and it feels like no amount of meditation or gratitude will quell the anxiety.
 
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Poet

Junior member
Joined
Dec 21, 2020
Messages
19
Location
London
I do the same thing. Build it all up in my head and feel so anxious. It's really hard not to do it. Just try and hang in there until your dentist has seen it and you know what the options are. It will be ok.
 
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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
It’s SO hard. I’m literally struggling all day. But I keep repeating that the appt hasn’t happened yet, nothing has happened yet.

I really think I’m gonna ask for iv sedation to get through my next appts (4 or 5 to get through). I’m making myself sick with anxiety waiting.
 
Enarete

Enarete

Super Moderator
Staff member
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Sep 18, 2017
Messages
3,141
The last few days before a procedure are unbearable, right? I don't really think you can stop the anxiety in any way (I bet you tried:) if controling anxiety was so easy, everyone would go to the dentist without problem. You are scared because you had bad experiences in the past and now you are about to do a super brave thing and face it. Of course you are nervous! How could you not be. So maybe these days are not about fighting it, trying to find a way to escape it and resisting it, but simply to acknowledge that you will feel like crap for the next few days. I am sorry it's not good news, but this is dental phobia. The good thing is that you can still make use of it: how about journaling about what is going on in your head? Or preparing a list of questions for your dentist? Making a list of your fears and brainstorming about what could help? Figuring out how you will reward yourself after the appointment? Staying kind to yourself and taking it one step at a time?
 
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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
You are so wonderful enarete! Sometimes it really is that simple, just accepting and make myself as comfortable as possible for the next 3 days. I already have a reward set up right after the appt, I am going to spend some time with my mom. I’ve also made some massage therapy appts in the upcoming weeks to give something to look forward to. Sometimes it feels helpless... but those moments always seem to pass as well. I think I’ll be ok. And that’s enough for me right now.
 
Enarete

Enarete

Super Moderator
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Sep 18, 2017
Messages
3,141
I already have a reward set up right after the appt, I am going to spend some time with my mom. I’ve also made some massage therapy appts in the upcoming weeks to give something to look forward to. Sometimes it feels helpless... but those moments always seem to pass as well. I think I’ll be ok. And that’s enough for me right now.
This is a beautiful approach, great! :) I often use the pre-appointment anxiety to allow myself to do WHATEVER feel right at the moment. Stying in my pyjama and not taking a shower the whole day? Be it so. I am a phobic and having a hard time. Buying a huge cake and eating it alone while sitting in bed? Be it so. I shall stay kind with myself, the last few days before an appointment are hard. Standing in the shower for half an hour? Be it so, I am a phobic and having an appointment! Staring at the wall for an hour? No problem, whatever I need. It's been a few years since I started my journey and by now, I almost look forward to those days off.
 
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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
It’s funny, I literally just did stand in the shower for 30 minutes and I’m feeling a bit more at ease, at least for now. The appt isn’t happening yet, and I will be able to get through it. Monday is the day I get to see and hang out with my mom, not the day I have a dentist appt haha. Thanks for your words of wisdom. I am so grateful.
 
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needlephobic

Member
Joined
Jun 7, 2014
Messages
24
I can definitely emphasize with you in this situation! Having any number of teeth in need of work is terrifying to me - I had 6 fixed over the course of 4 months. Like you, I get so stressed and anxious and the truth is it only gets worse as the appointment gets closer (that’s why my dentist will try to get me in as soon as possible. It’s hard to sleep and eat and it’s constantly on your mind, at least that’s what it’s like for me. Just try and remember you are so brave to even schedule these appointments and try to tackle your fears. Be proud of yourself for this! If I can give you any advice for the next few days it would be to try and distract yourself as much as possible. Talk to friends, watch TV, go for a walk, keep taking those showers, and do what makes you happy. You can do this! As for thoughts on asking for a referral, like others have said, do what’s best for you! Don’t worry about your dentist losing the profit - if they truly care for and support you in this, they would much rather do what makes you feel most comfortable over doing it themselves. I would suggest trying to go for your Monday appointment and seeing how it goes. If you have a good relationship with your current dental practice and they understand your fears and can work with you to help in anyway they can, then it may go better than you think. If this is the case you could consider finishing the work with them, but, if it’s just too much for you and you feel the referral will help out your mind at ease (or at least reduce the anxiety a bit) then don’t feel bad asking for it. Best of luck! We will be thinking of you!
 
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champ

Member
Joined
Dec 14, 2020
Messages
29
Location
new york
In my own experience, I had a lot of dental work done in my 20s and 30s, but haven't had anything but checkups and a hole in a crown fixed since then. (25 years) So I think your teeth can be returned to a state of stability and be kept that way. (I just don't eat candy-candy except on the big holidays when I treat myself and worry.) See if you can determine what's causing the cavities and if it's possible to cut that factor out. It will be okay.
 
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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
This forum brings so much comfort to me. Thank you all so much for your replies and your good vibes. I think it’s working because I’m feeling brave and strong, trying my best to stay in the moment and not worry about monday. I know I’m scared but I’m so much more than that. Hoping I can keep this mindset up!
 
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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
My appt is tomorrow... and I’m feeling okay. I credit this forum and meditation so thank you all. I will relax today and do whatever I want. I’m planning to take 3mg of lorazepam before I go, so that I can keep a firm hold on being calm. I have to get a broken tooth fixed and maybe get a filling done. Whatever I feel comfortable with. Thanks everyone
 
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MumOfBoys1985

Well-known member
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Sep 4, 2020
Messages
196
Location
Uk
Lots of luck for tomorrow. You will be just fine. What time is your appt?
 
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Lrobyn

Member
Joined
Dec 16, 2020
Messages
50
Location
Canada
My appt is 8am, first thing in the morning. I will come back in and let you guys know how it goes. I know it won’t be as bad as I think, but my mind really takes hold sometimes and makes it truly terrifying to think of sitting in the chair. But I’m setting myself up for success. I’m taking lorazepam before, my dentist is a WONDERFUL man who understands me and always tries to save the tooth. I’ll get through as much as I can in an hour, then my mom is picking me up and we are spending some nice time together. I can’t believe how difficult it has become to go to the dentist. It’s so trying for me but I guess it’s giving me an opportunity to practice gratitude and mindfulness.

I am grateful for my teeth, access to good dental care and full insurance.
 
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