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Aborted appointment

D

Dodioban

Junior member
Joined
Feb 7, 2024
Messages
9
Location
Scotland
I’m new here. I decided last Summer that I had to face the days of dental reckoning. The constant fear of not going to the dentist is now about equal to the fear of going. My big problem is injections. Anyway I agreed a plan of treatment and the first real appointment was yesterday evening. Due to a misunderstanding, and I feel the dentist not listening to me on a previous occasion, I arrived expecting to receive fast acting oral sedation while the dentist thought I was arriving already sedated. I considered trying to do without but just couldn’t. I was so built up for this over months and believed if I got through the first appointment ok, I’d cope better in the future. So instead of feeling triumphant today, I’m ashamed, embarrassed and feel I’m back to minus square one. I wanted oral midazolam (and this is where the not listening comes in) but I can’t have it. I can only have 10mg of diazepam in the future. Diazepam doesn’t help me, I’ve had it before. Have made GP appointment to discuss other options. I don’t want IV sedation because of needle and now increased trust issues. Any advice.
 
I don't have much advice other than to say you shouldn't feel ashamed or embarrassed. As you stated, there was a misunderstanding and a lack of listening on the dentist's part. It happens, it's not uncommon. You'll be able to come back at it again with better understanding and information. This is a process you're going through and you're learning something each step of the way.
 
Thank you. I am certainly learning from it. I simply can’t have anything like that happen again. I need to make another plan. Don’t know what yet. I appreciate your comment.
 
Hi @Dodioban, as oneby said, there is no need to feel ashamed or embarrassed. This wasn't your fault, you did so well turning up despite your nerves, and something totally unexpected happened which would have thrown anyone in the same position.

It might be worth searching for a dentist with a bit more experience with supporting nervous patients? We've collected some tips here for finding such a dentist:


I'd also recommend having a read of these tips:


Not sure whereabouts in Scotland you are, but we have some recommendations here on the forum (if you scroll down on the main forum page to the Find or Recommend a Dentist section).
 
Thank you for these really helpful and supportive suggestions. I’m going to stick with the current dentist as I feel he does understand how nervous I am. It’s all consuming really- next appointment is a week today and it's like living in a dark cloud. In 1999 via a site similar to this one, I received treatment in Yorkshire. It was a hell of a long way to go but was completely pain free. That dentist is now retired and living in the same county as me. His own dentist is the one I’m now registered with. Despite the catastrophe of the last appointment, I do still have some trust because of the direct connection with my previous dentist. I have been offered 10 mg of diazepam from the dentist which I have declined. It’s not enough and makes me feel really ill afterwards. I’ve persuaded my GP to prescribe Lorazepam but again it’s not enough 7mg total to get me through the build up to the appointment. Certainly not enough to have a trial run beforehand. She’s told me to take 0.5/1mg before the appointment. It’s laughable. I’ve previously taken 4mg (against advice) for an appointment and still felt normal but I did manage to get through the ordeal. I don’t want to be asleep, I want to be calm without racing panic thinking. It’s the needles that’s the worst. BTW I have initiated this course of treatment myself. I realised the only way I could remove the constant fear of needing emergency treatment was to deal with it all as a non emergency. Much of it is cosmetic as I’m now 63 and decided it’s time I could actually smile. But I’m back in a black hole of fear now. I’ve spent most of my life thinking that I might die before having to face up to this but I’m not dead and I know it’s a deeply unhealthy way to think.
 
I’m going to stick with the current dentist as I feel he does understand how nervous I am. It’s all consuming really- next appointment is a week today and it's like living in a dark cloud. In 1999 via a site similar to this one, I received treatment in Yorkshire. It was a hell of a long way to go but was completely pain free. That dentist is now retired and living in the same county as me. His own dentist is the one I’m now registered with.

Oh, a dentist's dentist, that's a very good recommendation indeed - I'm not surprised you'd like to stick with him :) (and what a small world, I think I know who you're referring to, his initials aren't DS by any chance?).

From what you're saying, it sounds as if you coped successfully before with your previous dentist. Did you use fast-acting oral sedation back then?
 
@letsconnect
Yes it was Dr DS. I had IV sedation (EMLA) the first time but returned several times with minimal oral sedation. The man is a hero in my book. His daughter is now working at my current dental practice as some sort of dental technician. I saw her once as an emergency with a broken tooth in 2022 and recognising her surname I said “I don’t suppose you’re any relation to DS?”. Yes she said “He’s my dad and he told me to look out for you as I was coming to work in Oban”. He’d remembered me from over 20 years ago because I was so bad with the phobia. He lives not far from here now and I’ve been invited to call in to see him at his home if I’m ever in his area. I hope I will one day- but only if I can smile. So they are well aware in the Dentists of my history.
 
And it’s helped me to write that 😀
 
Dear Dobiban,

Please allow me to share with you few videos I made that might be helpful. Hope it helps.
Treat your dental fear: HOW TO CHOOSE THE RIGHT DENTIST FOR YOU
Introduction to "Treat your dental fear"

I am not big fan of diazepam, never used it (as a dentist or a patient). If you use sedation, I would recommend only intravenous rather than oral administration.
Soon I will make a video about fear of injections. Hope you like it.

Best wishes,
Daniel
 
Thank you. The videos are definitely reassuring. I look forward to the needle phobia help video. That is my big problem and it’s so severe it’s potentially fatal. Without EMLA (2 hours) I will not permit any needle procedure. I’m the only one in my family like this. I don’t even have my ears pierced. The thought is horrific to me. I hope I can be helped- even a little bit.
 
That sounds good, keeping my fingers crossed that it all works out for you @Dodioban 👍!

If all else fails, there's always Mike Gow in Glasgow (if you're still prepared to travel), I'm sure he'd be able to help with the needle phobia. Always good to have a Plan B to take off the pressure :).
 
Thank you. That is extremely reassuring to me. Today is D Day. I’ll check in when I feel up to it.
 
Three hour appointment to make a start on corrections front upper teeth. Still some work to do, then bottom ones. Maybe bridges on top to because not enough bone for implants. Surprisingly probably enough bone on bottom but hugely expensive. So relieved it’s over I can’t find the words. My phobia is now 50%. I took 4.5 mg of lorazepam instead of prescribed .5/1mg. Dentist didn’t notice anything untoward with me. Told him I’d taken Lorazepam but not how much. It slowed my thinking down and stopped me from panicking. But I’d didn’t feel really relaxed or calm. Hardly felt the needles at all. 6 in total. Most felt 0/5 and one was 1/5. A great success. This pic was taken 10 minutes later in supermarket. IMG_4610.jpeg
 
What a great outcome @Dodioban and what a beautiful smile, you must be thrilled :thumbsup!:!

Also good to hear that you hardly felt the needles :).

Congratulations!!!
 
Thank you. I’ll check in as work proceeds. Over the 🌙
 
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