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Afraid of embarrassment

B

Beyondscurred

Junior member
Joined
Oct 1, 2016
Messages
2
i am that person who rarely goes to the dentist. I have to be in pain and can't deal with in order to go. A little back story. My mother had 6 kids and we never went to the dentist. I ended up in foster care and whenever they would take us to the dentist we would be in rhis big room and all the kids would stand on line while the dentist took turns tearing our mouths apart. Let's say that's where my fear began. After which I have had almost every back tooth filled with silver filling, a few root canals, and some extractions due to always waiting. Every time I go to the dentist I get anxious and depressed and so worried about what they will say about me or to me.

Last night I had a crown that fell out. And I m left with this hole in my mouth. Luckily it is near the back and you can't see it unless I open really wide. I made an appointment for Monday at a place I've never been to before and I here biting nails Bc I'm afraid of having the worst mouth they have ever seen. I know I am over exaggerating but between my two crooked front teeth, my missing, teerh, fillings, and yellow hue I'm super nervous!!

Eventually I want to get my teeth fixed (maybe after hitting the lottery) because I work in HR and I talk to many people a day. Ugh it's so discouraging and I just hope that this new dentist treats me well.
 
I'm not sure if this will help, but they have a whole section addressing the fear of embarrassment. It's one of the most common symptoms of dental phobia:

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Re: Afraid of embarrassment - Careful of Yuki's link

Just a friendly warning that Yuki's link may be a trigger for some people, as takes you right to photos of really bad teeth.

I don't think that was intentional. I think the intention was to take you here instead: Embarrassed? - What dentists really think, which is a very excellent area with nothing more graphic than a cartoon of a guy with his mouth open laying back in a dental chair. After 10 years too scared to go to the Dentist, that page is the single biggest reason I'm able to go regularly now and I recommend it wholeheartedly.

In summary, your Dentist has probably seen worse teeth than yours, and your Dentist wants to help you. If your Dentist can not focus on how great it is that you are taking care of your teeth now rather than criticizing you for a past you can not change, you need a new Dentist. You should be able to establish your ground rules before you even let the Dentist take a peek.

I always use the tip at the bottom about telling your Dentist from the start that you are very embarrassed about the state of your mouth and cannot cope with any negative remarks. Even now, if I tell the Dentist that I'm embarrassed about not brushing and flossing like I should, there is no reason for the Dentist to say anything about it, and I don't have to hear even the gentlest of lectures.

And in the unlikely circumstance that the Dentist doesn't respect your wishes in this matter, find a new Dentist. You, either directly or indirectly, are paying the Dentist to take care of you. If they are shaming you, especially after you tell him/her your embarrassment is a big part of why your mouth is as bad as it is, he/she is not doing their job, and you should take your business elsewhere.
 
Omigosh it wasn't intentional at all! Im so sorry! :shame:

God Id never do that to anyone. If I could remove it I would. I thought I was linking to the other section.
 
Omigosh it wasn't intentional at all! Im so sorry! :shame:

God Id never do that to anyone. If I could remove it I would. I thought I was linking to the other section.

Do you not get an "Edit Post" button below your post? I don't remember the rules, so maybe it only shows up under certain circumstances.
 
Omigosh it wasn't intentional at all! Im so sorry! :shame:

God Id never do that to anyone. If I could remove it I would. I thought I was linking to the other section.

I changed the link for you. :)
 
i am that person who rarely goes to the dentist. I have to be in pain and can't deal with in order to go. A little back story. My mother had 6 kids and we never went to the dentist. I ended up in foster care and whenever they would take us to the dentist we would be in rhis big room and all the kids would stand on line while the dentist took turns tearing our mouths apart. Let's say that's where my fear began. After which I have had almost every back tooth filled with silver filling, a few root canals, and some extractions due to always waiting. Every time I go to the dentist I get anxious and depressed and so worried about what they will say about me or to me.

Last night I had a crown that fell out. And I m left with this hole in my mouth. Luckily it is near the back and you can't see it unless I open really wide. I made an appointment for Monday at a place I've never been to before and I here biting nails Bc I'm afraid of having the worst mouth they have ever seen. I know I am over exaggerating but between my two crooked front teeth, my missing, teerh, fillings, and yellow hue I'm super nervous!!

Eventually I want to get my teeth fixed (maybe after hitting the lottery) because I work in HR and I talk to many people a day. Ugh it's so discouraging and I just hope that this new dentist treats me well.

Just to pile on what everyone else is saying, there is no way your teeth will be the worst the dentist has ever seen. Not a chance! I went to the dentist when I was 25, after many years of ignoring issues (my depression and anxiety contributed to my bad oral care) and my teeth were pretty terrible. Most of them were either broken down or significantly decayed. The remaining ones weren't pretty either.

The dentist wasn't fazed in the slightest. And neither was any of the professionals that looked in my mouth during my journey, from assistants, to nurses, to anasthesiologists...no one so much as blinked an eye! They are professionals, and it's their job to treat these things. Can you imagine a doctor or surgeon recoiling from a wound or something? :p

You will be fine. :hug4:
 
Do you not get an "Edit Post" button below your post? I don't remember the rules, so maybe it only shows up under certain circumstances.


No, you can only edit something within the first few hours. Afterwards, it disappears. The moderator thankfully changed the link.
 
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