• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone who is has a severe fear of the dentist or dental treatment. Please note that this is NOT a general dental problems or health anxiety forum! You can find a list of them here.

    Register now to access all the features of the forum.

Badly abused by dentist



Junior member
Dec 29, 2017
I’m sorry not to leave a more positive note for my fellow scared patients. I am terrified at the dentist but have managed not too bad with several appointments over the last year. Sadly my dentist has refused to treat me any more... thrown me off her books and raged at me in the reception area. I am so embarrassed and ashamed. She says that because I asked a question about a previous filling she had done it means I no longer trust her.... I have complained but fear all the witnesses are her colleagues..... please help
I dont think there is no wrong with asking questions about your filings, its your mouth. I hope you can sort the problem out, or find a better dentist who will answer your questions without any problems.
Thanks. I have to go elsewhere as I am thrown out by her..... another dentist at the practice said they will take me on, but I’m afraid I will be too tearful as the thought of entering the building fills me with dread. I pay monthly by Denplan so am reluctant to go elsewhere as I am due a check up and have already paid.....

I'm so sorry this happened to you, I'm not sure of the details but, sounds pretty immature and unprofessional . I'd be really taken back and discouraged to say the least and probably wouldn't want or trust working with her anyways in the future. I know it takes some time to develop trust and find someone with patience and good chairside manner but I encourage you to do that and go to a place that makes you feel comfortable and can treat you kindly.
That sounds crazy unprofessional!

Guess what. You're allowed to ask questions. You're allowed to not blindly trust a dentist. You're a patient seeking the best care, not your dentist's best friend!

Unfortunately, healthcare, like any other industry, is populated by a lot of different kinds of people. And some of them are narcissists. You tell your story to other dentists, and I guarantee 90% of them would be appalled.

It's okay to take time to come to terms with the horrible, traumatic thing that happened to you. You were betrayed and publicly berated by someone you trusted. That's a big deal, and don't beat yourself up for needing time to come to terms with it. But don't let it put you off dentists forever.

I've had some monstrous dentists, but many absolutely lovely ones who did their very best to give me good treatment and take my needs into account. I promise there are better dentists out there for you. :)
Thanks. I think you are right... narcissists react violently to anything they perceive as a criticism..... she is a bully and shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near nervous patients

If you want to look into methods of reporting her to a board etc, do so. If you don't want to, and would rather put the incident behind you, you can do that too. But I'd at least put an anonymous review up online, if there's a specific webpage for it. If anyone on her "side" contacts you about the review, you can ignore it. Only do it if it would make you feel better to put the word out about her.

As with any traumatic experience, take care of number one first. And that means you. :)
Flip me, does she have a problem or what! I ask my dentist (been with him 6 years now) a huge number of questions, seriously I like to know everything from the name of the filler...to why he's changing the end of the drill. It's not that I don't trust him, I completely do - but its my body, my mouth and I like to know whats going on and have answers (I'm actually very interested in the processes). I'm sure he'd rather be getting on with it without my blathering on, but part of being a dentist is dealing with people and all their individual intricacies and needs. Its not just about 'doing the work' but recognising that they are ultimately accountable to the patient. Have I questioned him about work done? Yes of course. I have also returned a number of times when something isn't quite right, as I recognise that (despite the fact that he's a brilliant dentist) there are often other variables which affect outcomes. He is proactive in listening to my needs, and patient-centred. Sounds like you need just that, a patient-centred dentist!

I'm not sure what question you could have asked which made her react in such a way, maybe something like 'WHy did you cack up my other filling?' :giggle: Seriously, she sounds odd.