• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone who is has a severe fear of the dentist or dental treatment. Please note that this is NOT a general dental problems or health anxiety forum! You can find a list of them here.

    Register now to access all the features of the forum.

Bastet's Journal

So happy for you!
 
Today I went to my appointment. I didn't get any warm fuzzy feelings, but everyone treated me with respect. Yay. I was very happy with the thoroughness of the exam. Since everyone was being respectful, I was even OK letting a hygienist come in and do perio charting. She was very nice. Yay. I have 2s, 3s, and 4s. I'm a little down on myself for having 4s, but considering I'm coming up on nine years without a professional cleaning, I'll cut myself some slack.

I was comfortable enough to schedule an appointment for a debridement next week. Six weeks or so after that, we'll see if any of my 4s went down to 3s. I hope so. The hygienist did say it looks like I'm brushing too hard. I'm sure that's true, because brushing reminds me about all my dental issues, and I stress out.

The only unpleasant surprise was finding out I have to have two more crowns replaced that the first dentist didn't tell me about. This dentist showed me why on the radiograph, and it was pretty obvious even to my untrained eye.

One thing I really like about this dentist is that he told me he'll make recommendations and explain why, but it's up to me to decide what to do. Of course it should always be like that, but some doctors seem not wanting to accept that.

The best part was when the assistant asked the dentist about the prioritization of the extraction, and he put it last. He said that the tooth had a root canal, and it wasn't causing me any trouble, so it could wait. Validation. Too bad the first dentist wasn't willing to inform his assistant like that.

Finally I feel like I've had some real success. I'll just keep chugging along.
 
So glad that you've had a better experience this time.
 
Yesterday the new dentist's office called me. One of the teeth that had a root canal looks weird, and the dentist was going to refer me to an endodontist for evaluation. I told him that I had recently gotten the root canal in the tooth next to it, so the endodontist probably noticed the weird tooth. I said he could call there if he wanted, and he said he would. The assistant called to tell me the endodontist wasn't in the office when she called, and she wouldn't be able to call again until Monday. They really keep patients informed in this office!

I hope it's OK and that the endodontist would have said something to me or the first dentist if there was a problem. I'll just have to wait and see.

I was thinking about how facial expressions and tone of voice matter so much at the dentist's office. At the first dentist, the assistant said that I sure had a lot of dental work done, and I felt ashamed. The new dentist said that I've definitely been to the dentist before, but he had a smile on his face, so I thought it was a little funny.
 
I was so impressed that the assistant called me to update me last week, but then I didn't hear from anyone again. I hope everything is OK. I guess I'll find out soon.
 
I had my debridement appointment today. It went well. I decided to go with nitrous oxide. The last time I had it was 30 years ago, but I remembered it being helpful. I was surprised today that I felt kind of panicky when the hygienist put the mask on my nose. I felt like I was having trouble breathing. I told myself to try to hold out until it starts working, and if I still felt that way, I could tell her to take it off. The hygienist bumped the mask a little, and it repositioned. I immediately felt better. I guess one side was pushing against my nose too much. If it ever happens again, I'll know better.

I like nitrous oxide, because it takes the edge off and helps with my gagging problems. I didn't feel like I wanted to fight against everything in my mouth. It doesn't sedate me so much that I don't care about anything, so I still need to think of things to help myself cope.

I had a different hygienist today. She was also very nice. Yay. She said the lower anteriors were the ones with the most build-up, but the others weren't really all that bad. I'm going to have a follow-up in about a month. I was expecting to be really sore tonight, but honestly, my mouth doesn't even feel like I had anything done today.

I have to add that the main assistant at this office is starting to bug me too. I only scheduled with the hygienist, and the assistant told me I need to take care of my cavities. Really? I had no idea. It's a good thing she told me. Seriously, I wish that dental staff understood that people like me don't let this happen over and over again because we don't know any better or don't understand the consequences of our actions. Anyhow, she said it sympathetically, so I was more annoyed than hurt.

They couldn't get any information about that tooth from the endodontist, so they want me to go see him to check it out. I'm doing that next week. I have to make sure they know I have a new dentist.
 
Last edited:
I saw the endodontist today. He compared today's radiograph with one from November that showed the weird looking tooth. He said that since I have no symptoms, and it looks the same as it did in November, my dentist should just keep an eye on it. He also said that anytime I change dentists, the new dentist will probably want to send me to an endodontist to have that tooth checked.

I'm glad that at least for now I don't have to worry about it.
 
Today was my appointment for a regular cleaning and re-evaluation. Everything went OK. The hygienist said I can be on six month recall. I'm glad about that. I was afraid I'd be on three or four.

I had nitrous oxide again. I felt weird about it, because it was just a regular cleaning, but then with all the water and the polishing cup, I was glad that I had it. I would have been struggling more if I had gone without. I'm not going to push myself yet to go without it. I've more than proven to myself that I can have work without it, so for now, I'm just going to let myself be more comfortable.

I was a little amused today. I was lying there thinking about all my dental appointments in high school, because the dentist I had almost always put me on nitrous oxide. I was thinking the more things change the more they stay the same. Then I thought "Hey! It's the same music too." Ha ha. Andy Gibb and everything.

My next appointment is with the dentist in a few weeks.
 
Great job!
 
Today was my appointment with the dentist. It didn't go as well as I had hoped. This appointment was to take care of some decay around my bridge. The dentist I had been seeing was going to replace the bridge, so I guess I bought myself some time.

I felt pretty confident this morning. I was even OK eating a decent amount of breakfast. After I was seated at the office, the assistants started messing around with the nitrous tanks, so there were all kinds of clanging noises. It made me think of bells tolling for a funeral or something. I guess it wasn't that big of a deal, but it showed me they weren't really thinking about my anxiety at all. They should have taken care of that before calling me back.

I had a rough time with the work. The bridge is in the back, and the suction and retraction were difficult for me, even with the gas. I'm not sure I could have gotten through the appointment without it. The dentist wasn't very comforting. He wasn't mean, but he didn't seem to see me as someone who could use some extra time and assurance.

I made another appointment for two more fillings. I want to get the work finished, and I know I can do it with the gas. I don't think I want him to be my "forever dentist" though.

I guess I had higher hopes for today.
 
I have read your journey and I am impressed with your perseverance through it all. I would have begun sobbing if an assistant treated me the way you were treated. What a holy witch! Would you be comfortable talking with or e-mailing this dentist and saying something along the lines of "I know the location of the bridge made it difficult to work on and I struggled with it as well. Would it be possible for us to (you need to fill in the blank) during the next appointment? I hope that it will help me cope better and should help make your task easier." Just a suggestion. I also find writing down my thoughts keeps me from feeling intimidated. If you don't know what might help then I would simply say "try some tricks you know". I am not sure you are aware just how much I admire you. :respect:
 
sleeplessinseattle -

Thanks for the encouragement.

I don't want to write a note to this dentist, because I think he would just push for a deeper kind of sedation, and I don't want to do that. I'll be OK with the nitrous oxide though. It helps a lot with the gagging, and I feel like that is my biggest issue right now.

I appreciate what you said about that assistant. She really hurt me, and it helps me to know that other people agree that what she did was inappropriate. It was so hard for me to go back to that dentist to ask him for help and to let him see how bad I had allowed things to get. When he said he would help, I thought everything would be OK. I never expected anyone like her to be working in his office.
 
Today I had an appointment to replace two fillings. I feel that it went about the same as the last appointment. Not unbearable, but certainly not comfortable. I don't even feel like the nitrous oxide took the edge off of my anxiety this time. I didn't gag, but I don't think I would have anyhow because of the location of the teeth.

He used a rubber dam for one of the fillings. When he attached it, I was thinking that I couldn't breath. I had to remind myself that there was no way the dam was stopping me from breathing, because I had the mask over my nose.

My next appointment is supposed to be for the extraction. I guess when he told his assistant to move it to last on the treatment plan, she forgot to do it. I don't really care, because I'd just like to get through it at this point. The only problem is, I made an appointment for him to do it next month, but the more I think of it, the more I think I would rather go to an oral surgeon. It's not that I don't think he could do it. I trust him enough to think he wouldn't take on something he wasn't comfortable doing. It's just that I think an oral surgeon could have that thing out of there in less than two minutes. They scheduled me for an hour at this office. I know that a piece of that time is for dealing with the nitrous oxide, but still. It seems like a scary amount of time to reserve.

I have to add that I got an automated e-mail from my former dentist's office telling me it's time to schedule my recall appointment. I actually said "Ha!" out loud after I read it.
 
I may regret it later, but I just sent an e-mail to the dentist's office asking to cancel the appointment I scheduled for the extraction next month. A couple things have been going through my mind.

I was thinking about my last appointment. I only knew the dentist had walked in, because I saw his reflection in the window. He eventually made his obligatory greeting, but he was still standing behind me. By the time he was sitting next to me, he already had his mask on. I did not see his face at all that day. I wouldn't like that even if I weren't so anxious. As I have written before, he's not mean, but he doesn't exude much warmth.

When I was about 14 I had to have two teeth extracted that were in similar condition to the one I have now, except that they had never had root canal treatment. After he was finished, the oral surgeon said they were rough extractions. I was surprised he said that, because I sure couldn't tell from my end. I remember he moved on to the second tooth, and I thought it was weird that he didn't finish the first one before starting the second one. :giggle: He had finished, but I had no idea. I want a chance to have it be that easy on me again, and I just don't feel like I have that chance with my general dentist.

If the other appointments had been easier for me, I probably would have gone on with it, but I'm just not comfortable with it now. I wish I could have my old dentist with my new dentist's staff.
 
I feel like rambling a little.

Surprisingly, I can honestly say that I'm not down on myself or regretting canceling that extraction appointment. I thought I'd be sitting here feeling bad, because I could have had it over with by now, but I don't feel that way. I wasn't comfortable with letting him do it, and I don't regret following my instincts and canceling. It's when I haven't followed my instincts that I've had trouble. No one has contacted me to try to reschedule, and I'm happy about that.

I don't think I will go back to this dentist. I had expected to let him do any other work that needed to be done, because I thought the nitrous oxide would help get me through it. It worked great with the hygienist, but it just didn't work well with him. I suppose it's because at some level I don't trust him to take good care of me. I think he's probably fine technically, but there's more to it than that. I don't have any pressing work right now, so I'll look into finding another dentist. There has to be someone out there I'll trust. I've done it before.

I got another automated e-mail from my first dentist telling me to schedule an appointment. This one said I'm overdue. I felt like I was being scolded, and it made me anxious. I clicked on the unsubscribe link, but today I got another e-mail from them marketing Zoom. Yeah, that's just what I need. Zoom.
 
I'm in kind of a holding pattern right now. I looked around online and found another practice I'm considering. I've also thought about just keeping the hygiene appointment I have scheduled with my current dentist and seeing how it plays out. It's risky though. If it turns out that they aren't nice about my breaking that other appointment and not rescheduling, it will be even more of a setback for me.

I've also be thinking that maybe it would be better for me to find a dentist that is close to home instead of close to work. Being close to work is easier for me, but people who live in that area tend to have money. I think dentists there are set well enough financially that they don't need to waste their time with someone like me. On the other hand, I don't want someone who is willing to spend time with me just because s/he needs the money. I'm really overthinking all of this.

I saw my first dentist again the other morning when I was walking to work. At first I looked away, but then I decided I shouldn't feel ashamed. I looked at him and waved. He waved back, and that was that.

I was reading about how some consultants encourage dentists to play on their patients' emotions to get them to accept treatment. I guess that explains some things.
 
It's been just over a year now since I first went back to the dentist. I'm writing because I have been having several dentist dreams per night. There are two basic types.

In the first type, I dream that I went back to the dentist I saw recently, but he lectures me for not having scheduled the rest of my work. He basically tells me to either do what he says or leave, so I leave.

In the second type, I go back to the first dentist, and his assistant treats me just as she did before. I storm out and try to say something to the dentist, but he doesn't want to hear it. He goes on to talk to someone else.

I have a hygiene appointment scheduled in a little over a month that I am leaning toward keeping. The people at the first dentist's office have already shown me that they will treat me badly, but I think I can still give the current dentist a chance. I just don't feel up to starting over yet again, though I may eventually have to do that.
 
You can do it! Keep your head up :)
 
I feel like rambling a little. The hygiene appointment I have scheduled is coming up. I already told my boss about it, but I'm really not looking forward to going back that office again. I don't feel up to starting over with another office either, so I'm afraid if I don't keep this appointment I won't see a dentist again for a long time.

A couple of weeks ago I got an automated happy birthday e-mail from the first dentist's office. Even though logically I knew that it was automated, and no one in the office was thinking of me or my birthday. my first thought was "Don't pretend to care about my birthday after the way you treated me." Obviously, I'm taking the whole situation with the first dentist very personally.
 
Wow, I was definitely worried for no reason. Yay! I had my appointment today, and no one scolded me or played on my emotions because I didn't finish my treatment plan. The dentist told me what was still open, and said none of it is an emergency, but I should take care of it when I can. I made an appointment to have two crowns replaced next month. I can use my insurance again starting in January, so that will help. I'm still not feeling sure about having the extraction there.

I'll see how it goes with the crown appointment. Maybe I just have to get used to his working personality. One thing I liked today is that he actually did an exam. I'm used to having the dentist just look around for a few seconds and basically rely on the hygienist's report. This dentist did the kind of exam I used to get from my high school dentist.

I had nitrous oxide for the cleaning again. Part of me feels like I shouldn't do that, but a few times today I thought to myself I would have gagged just then if I didn't have it. I don't know. I feel like if no one makes fun of me for having it, I want to use it. The hygienist seems well-educated in administering it, so I doubt I'm the only one who gets it.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top