• Dental Phobia Support

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Bastet's Journal

I had my appointment for two crowns this week, and I had a hard time again. I was feeling OK about the appointment before I got there, because I knew the teeth weren't in my gagging zone. Also I knew the dentist used Cerec, so there wouldn't be impressions.

I had nitrous oxide again, but this time I had to sign a consent form. I thought it was a little weird, because I had already had it several times before without having to sign anything. The assistant also took my blood pressure. She said it was something like 108/69. I have trouble believing that.

The worst part of the appointment was the Isolite. I had never experienced one before, and I was miserable. It felt almost as bad as having an impression tray in my mouth. The assistant said it would help me to keep my mouth open, but really, it forced my mouth to stay open. I had it in my mouth for well over an hour without a break. My jaw was killing me. A voice inside of me was begging me to speak up, but I couldn't bring myself to do it.

The spray used to get the images for Cerec was also a problem for me. Having the spray go up my nose, and that noxious smell really freaked me out. I'm surprised the nitrous mask didn't prevent that better.

When I scheduled the appointment, the receptionist told me it would be about 2.5 hours. She blocked off 3 hours, but it ended up going about 4. The dentist couldn't get a good image for both teeth at once, so he kept trying. That meant more spray. Also, whenever the camera was pushed down on my lip, it hurt. Finally, he decided to make one crown and cement it and then get the image for the second crown. More spray and more time with the Isolite.

After the second crown was made, I had to sit there for a long time while the assistant tried to get the contact right. Instead of the dentist adjusting the crown that had already been cemented along with the other crown, he just had the assistant work on the crown that wasn't cemented yet. That added at least 30 minutes to the appointment in itself.

The crowns don't look very good either. I didn't really notice until I saw them in different light. I have to admit, I knew that could happen with Cerec, but I didn't think I'd care all that much. They are on a premolar and a canine, so they aren't right in front, but they are visible. I know that I am acutely aware of them, and most other people won't really notice, but if I ever find my dream dentist, I will definitely want to replace at least the one on the canine in a couple years.

No one brought up the extraction I still need, and I sure didn't either. I still have my hygiene appointment scheduled in June. I like the hygienist, so if I haven't found a new dentist by then, I'll keep the appointment.

I have been trying to figure out why I have reverted back to suffering in silence. I'm really not sure why. I guess I felt like I couldn't ask him to work without the Isolite, so my best bet was to get through it as quickly as possible. I really don't know though.
 
I want to make a short post. Yesterday when I was walking to work I saw the assistant from the first dentist's office. I just kept walking, but it stirred up so many difficult feelings. I know if I ever find a dentist that I want to keep it will be easier for me to deal with things, but I'm not there yet.

I need to focus on the positive. Really the only work I need to have done is the final extraction. Everything else is finished, and I've had a couple regular cleanings since I started seeing a dentist again. I'm in much better shape than I was when I started.
 
This week I saw the first dentist while I was walking to work. It didn't bother me to see him. It got me thinking. If I could take the first dentist when he's behaving like a doctor and not a salesman, and give him the second dentist's staff, I would have the perfect dental office. That's not a lot to ask for, is it? Ha ha.
 
I had my six month appointment for an exam and cleaning. I was disappointed to find that the hygienist I like wasn't there. I wish dental offices would inform patients of changes like that ahead of time, so it wouldn't be so jarring.


I saw that the nitrous oxide wasn't in the room, and I wasn't feeling brave enough to ask about it. I promised myself I wouldn't let them charge me for it though. Luckily, the doctor came to do the exam before the hygienist started, and he noticed it wasn't there, so they got it set up for me.


He did a thorough exam. That's one of the things I like about this office. He made a comment that the tooth I need to have extracted was still decaying away. I didn't find that comment to be helpful in any way, but at least he left it at that.


I was glad I had the nitrous oxide. The hygienist started with the ultrasonic cleaner, and my teeth were really sensitive. It was the one time I was happy I've had so many root canals, because I didn't have to worry about sensitivity there. I was surprised because back when I had the debridement, I didn't have much sensitivity. She seemed kind of aggressive with the hand instruments too. I thought I was going to get a lecture on brushing better, but nobody said anything. I guess that's just the way she works.


I scheduled another appointment for six months, but I didn't schedule the extraction. I'm still thinking I want an oral surgeon to do it, but I don't know how to bring it up without being offensive. I'll have to do it eventually. I can't imagine it will stay symptom free for much longer.
 
It's been a while since I've updated my journal. I was supposed to have an appointment next week for a cleaning and check up, but I canceled it. I just don't want to go back there. Both of the hygienists I liked are gone. The last one I saw was very nice, but she had a rough touch. The dentist I think is technically skilled, but his personality doesn't work well with mine.

I'm worried because it means I don't have a dentist again. I didn't burn any bridges, but as I said, I just don't want to go back there.

A side note...

I checked my spam folder at work and found another e-mail from the first dentist's office. I've already unsubscribed from a few of their lists. I wonder how many lists they have.
 
I wasn't going to write again unless I made some progress, but I changed my mind. I think I am pretty close to contacting another office, but I haven't been able to get myself to do it. I dread going through all the new patient stuff again. I still have those moments where I can't believe I'm still looking for a dentist. I remember after I made an appointment with the first dentist, I was so sure I was back on track.

I heard from both dentist's offices. Both were on voicemail, because I'm always afraid to answer the phone when I see the numbers. The second office contacted me to reschedule the appointment I broke. It was an ordinary professional call. I still don't want to go back there. With the first office, I must have come up as a reminder in the system that I haven't completed the work on my treatment plan. The receptionist said that if I want to take care of my teeth, I should call. It reminded me of the time I forgot to approve my time at work, and my sarcastic boss asked me if I wanted to get paid.
 
I sent an email to another office. Unfortunately, the reason I was finally motivated to do it is that another crown popped off while I was flossing. The tooth has had a root canal, so there's no pain at least. If I don't get a response from this email, I have another dentist I'll try.

In the meanwhile, I've heard from both of the other offices. The hygienist from the first office called and left a message saying they would love to see me again. Well, she's never seen me, so there's that. Ha ha. She actually sounded very nice, but there is no one that can make up for their, just plain mean, assistant.

The second office sent a form email with the ADA recommendations for periodic cleanings and exams italicized. I know I'm extra sensitive about it, but the italics just felt like more scolding.

One thing that bothers me is that the crown that popped off is one that the first dentist did not all that long ago really. I know I should have been keeping up with my appointments, so it's on me. Still, it seems like it should have stayed bonded longer. It's not like I have stopped my home care.

Anyhow, I'll see what happens next. With any luck I'll hear from the new office next week. If I do, I'm ready to schedule an appointment.
 
I heard back from the office already on Saturday. It was a nice reply. It didn't specifically mention my phobia, but it was nice enough that I want to give the office a try. She wanted to know if I have more questions or if I would like to set up a new patient appointment. I finally got up the courage to reply tonight, and I told her I popped out a crown and would like to start with an appointment for that if possible.
 
Keeping my fingers crossed for you that this will be "the one" :thumbsup:

Best of luck :grouphug:
 
Thanks letsconnect!

I heard back from the office. It was a different person, but she offered a couple times today. I'm not feeling ready for that, so I replied that appointments at around 9:00 work best for me.

I love it when offices are willing to make appointments by email even though it takes more time. It saves me from the "dreaded phone call."

I actually heard back while writing this post. She offered me tomorrow, but I truly can't go tomorrow, because it conflicts with a meeting at work. They are finding out early how much fun I am to work with. Ha ha.
 
You don't sound particularly demanding to me :) - I'm sure you'll feel much better about things once you find someone who is gentle and in tune with you.
 
I may be too demanding for this office, because after I replied that I couldn't take the appointment for today, I didn't hear back from them. If I haven't heard anything by the time I get home from work, I will send a note to the next office on my list. It's disappointing, but that's how it goes sometimes.

I've been hunting for dentists in the area that specifically say they treat phobic patients, but it seems they are mostly wanting to sell oral sedation. I think the second dentist I saw is kind of in that category too. I'm OK with nitrous oxide, but I'm not doing anything that would require another person to get me home safely.

I went to work a little early one day last week, and for the first time in a while, I saw the first dentist outside. He smiled and waved, but then he said "long time" as he walked by. Yeah, thanks. I can't imagine why.
 
I didn't hear again from the office I contacted, so I sent a message to another office last night. I heard from them this morning and scheduled an appointment for Monday. I'm actually feeling good about this one. I printed out the new patient forms and there are questions about fear. I really like that.

I'm not getting my hopes up too high, but I'm sensing this office is a good possibility. :)
 
That sounds promising - best of luck for Monday :clover: :grouphug:
 
Bastet, you are so much doing the right thing. Your endurance and absolute clearness about your standards is impressive and I wished all nervous patients would chose their dentists that carefully. You deserve a dentist committed to provide you a good experience, someone who can accommodate your needs and especially whose whole team is on board with nervous patients so that you can finally reach a state of keeping coming back.

I'm wondering how it comes that so many practices just don't get the fact that receiving a sudden phone call from a dental practice is, for a nervous patient, totally scary..

Your journey have been a long one and you are trying hard not to lose momentum which is not easy but the only right thing to do and that's very inspiring. You also seem to know yourself and your fear quite well which will be very helpful for your future dentist. And you make no compromises when it comes to what you need to feel comfortable, which is very strong. I know it's only a question of time till you find the right dental team.

So hold on, keep us posted and all the best for Monday.
 
Thank you for the support.

I’m getting more nervous now, but that’s not a surprise. I filled out the patient forms last night. There sure were a lot of them. Some of the questions made me uncomfortable like the one about how often I go to the dentist. One asked who my previous dentist was, and I’m not answering that one.

I hope it’s better dealing with them in person. I understand why they need that information, but the more I got into the forms, the worse I felt about myself. I still like that they asked about fear though, so it’s not all bad.
 
Forms are scary, I don't like them either and wasn't able to fill in mine back then because it was just too triggering.. and it's a matter of trust too, nobody is eager to give personal information to a place that is not familiar yet, so I totally get that you don't want to answer some things.

You must be a real form-pro by now.. :)
 
I think I may have found the right office. Everyone was so nice and respectful. Thursday I have an appointment with the hygienist, and if that goes well, I'll know for sure it's the right office.

Today I had a very thorough exam including full mouth x-rays. Not only did I not gag, it wasn't even a struggle for me. I also had the crown re-bonded. I was surprised it didn't need to be replaced. The doctor was very patient and explained everything she was going to do before she did it.

I need a bunch of stuff done. The things the last dentist was watching need to be taken care of now. Because I haven't had a cleaning in so long, my bigger pockets are back. Obviously, I didn't like hearing all of this, but she explained it all very professionally. She said she was glad I already knew I need that one tooth extracted. It's nice to know she doesn't enjoy delivering that kind of news the way the first dentist's assistant does. Ha ha.

So Thursday I'll see the hygienist. This dentist wants to treat my pockets more aggressively than the last one, and she said I'll probably be on four month recall. I'm not thrilled about that, but I think it's in my best interest, especially with all the work I have in my mouth. It's going to be up to me now to stay on track.

I told them I'd like to have nitrous oxide for any appointment they'll let me have it. They are on board with that, so I requested it for Thursday.
 
Finally! :) So glad to hear that they took a good care of you and were patient. Seems to be a very good place. They must have been really nice if they managed not to make you gag. Great news, thanks for updatingand all the best for Thursday, may it be such a positive visit again. Look forward to hear how your journey goes on.
 
Thanks Enarete!

Today's appointment was mostly good. The not so good part was that the hygienist asked questions about how my mouth got to be in the state that it's in, and I felt ashamed. The good part was that I recognized that she was not trying to make me feel ashamed. She just wanted to know what's going on because she was thinking about what to do to prevent more problems. So now I have a different mouth rinse and toothpaste with stronger fluoride. Yes I'm down on myself that I've come to need those things, but I have to focus on moving forward.

I had a full mouth cleaning plus some deeper scaling where I have the deeper pockets. I had nitrous oxide and no issue with gagging. She said I might be sore in some spots, but the only thing that is sore is my shoulder from being tensed up in the chair. This visit was actually much more comfortable than the regular cleaning I had with the last hygienist at the second office, so I'm not sure why I was so tense.

I was supposed to have two perio/hygiene appointments and then a follow up. It turns out the hygienist won't need the second appointment, so I have a follow up visit at the end of April. I scheduled an appointment to start my restorative work with the dentist at the end of March.

I need to contact the office because I forgot to tell the office manager that I would like to have nitrous oxide for the appointment with the dentist. I think they will be able to accommodate me, because it seems like the office is plumbed for the gas instead of having a tank that they move from room to room.

Two dental appointments in one week is a little much for me. If I can avoid doing that again I will. For now I will enjoy having a little breather and work on getting my home care where it needs to be.
 
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