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Boyfriends brother is a dentist... Rant

K

kittykat

Guest
I love my boyfriend. A lot. He knows about my dx of DID, he's a caring and compassionate doctor, he knows about my child abuse, and I even trusted him with my fear of dentists.

My fear of dentists is kind of crazy... my attacker was a dentist. It's very hard for me to talk about anything teeth related or dentist related or anything like that. Can barely brush my teeth without having a panic attack.

Well, here's the kicker: Boyfriend's brother is a dentist. It does not go well with me.... but they're very close and we go on double dates with him and his wife a lot.

I'm terrified of his brother. I don't like being left in the same room with him at any time whatsoever. I asked boyfriend to tell his brother about my fear of dentists so that he won't bring up any conversation about his work.

Oddly enough, the person that keeps talking about dentists is my boyfriend!!!

Today was very strange. I went to lunch with the boyfriend, his brother, brother's wife, and brother's baby. Brother, wife, and baby decided to go get smoothies while boyfriend and I went to get some candy at a store just a couple stores down. We decided to meet back at the smoothie place. On the smoothie place's door, there was an advertisement for a dentist office... you couldn't see the windows so we weren't sure if it was the smoothie place or if it was one of THOSE places.... to make things worse, everything in this shopping center was in Chinese so we had no idea if it was the right place or not.

I hesitated to go in because the ad freaked me out (pictures and everything) and I didn't want to step foot in one of those places. Boyfriend opened the door and I saw that it was just the smoothie place but I was in shock and started dissociating. We left after boyfriend got his smoothie and went back into his brother's car. Boyfriend starts talking about how he thought the smoothie place was a dentist office and how confused he was... they got in a whole discussion.... I grabbed my boyfriends hand and dug my nails into his skin so he would shut up. And he was like "What???" and then he saw the look of horror on my face and said "ohhhh shit I'm sorry". I hid my face in his lap because I was scared and dizzy and crying.. It was pretty awful.

And this isn't the first time he's accidentally brought up dentist convos with his brother.... One time I was at dinner with his family and I was holding the baby and they started talking about scary things and I gave the baby to boyfriend and went outside the house and threw up in the backyard. It was awful awful awful and this was before boyfriend's brother knew about my phobia of... well... him.

Ok rant over. Thanks if you read.
 
Frida

Frida

Member
Joined
Oct 1, 2013
Messages
32
Location
Arizona
Wow I think I would be the same way. I was treated pretty bad by a dentist. I don't know if I could handle it. But is his brother nice? Could being around him help you with coping? I don't know I can't even handle walking past a dds office! Or hearing people talk about anything dental!
 
K

kittykat

Guest
He's really nice. Not mean or scary at all. Just the idea freaks me out. Maybe it will help with my fear...who knows
 
Dr. Daniel

Dr. Daniel

Well-known member
Verified dentist
Joined
Nov 2, 2010
Messages
1,869
Location
The Hague , Holland
Hi kittykat,

Have you ever been treated by a therapist? about the abuse I mean. This is the core problem after all.
 
K

kittykat

Guest
Yes, I'm working with a therapist now... have been for about year
 
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