Can’t make the appointment

[rhager]

I haven’t been to the dentist since I was a teenager. I’m 56 now. I know I have to go and want to go. I freeze up or keep stalling trying to make the appointment. It’s been 6 months since I got my dental insurance. I found a dentist I want to see and I have contacted them through email. I just have to make the phone call to make the appointment. Too scared to make it and fear the experience as a whole.

 

[NervousUSA]

@rhager Can you have someone else call for you? Maybe a partner or spouse? Or even someone to be with you while you make the call?

 

[rhager]

No, not really. It’s something I have do myself.

 

[NervousUSA]

It's too bad they won't let you do the whole process by email. I know how bad it is to have to call them. I had to go to the dentist after a 19 year break and I ended up having to find a place that would let me set everything up by email because I couldn't bear to call. I don't know if this would work for you, but I use box breathing to have a lower heart rate and less adrenalin while calling now.

 

[rhager]

That’s what I was trying to do and they said to call to set up the appointment. Thanks for the tips. I did try calling and they were closed for Christmas break. I just have to find the courage to do it again.

 

[Dg6300]

FWIW, here is an idea:

1. Call when you know they are closed.

2. Leave a message.

3. In the message, name three days/times you’re available (be expansive as you can). Example:

“Hello this is [your name and number]. Can I please request an appointment at either any Monday morning, or anytime Thursday? Thank you.”

Then they call you back and set up the appointment.

Two more FWIW ideas:

1. If calling is not working for you, then start emailing dozens or hundreds, if it comes to that, of practices, until you find one that will communicate only via email. Keep a spreadsheet of who’ve you contacted.

2. This idea is out there, but if you are “motivated” (read: desperate), here goes: hire someone from Fiverr.

Edit to add: and they call the practice for you.

Pros: You can email all of the pertinent info to your temporary employee, and it may cost as little as five dollars.

Cons: Eventually you’ll have to talk to, and go to, the practice.

Good luck. Keep us posted.

 

[LittleLynnie]

Maybe they just said to call to make the appointment because that's how it is usually done? Did you say that you would find that extremely difficult? And ask if they could possibly do it by email? In other words, did they say they wouldn't take a booking that way, or did they just say, "call us to make an appointment", assuming that you could do that easily?

 

[rhager]

They have an online form to fill out and they responded. They wanted to know why I was asking for consultation. I wrote back to explain. They wrote back to have me call to set up a new patient appointment.

 

[LittleLynnie]

Then you should definitely write back and explain to them how difficult that will be for you. It can't hurt to try, and if they're an understanding group, they will accommodate your request I think.

 

[rhager]

I finally got up the courage to call the dentist, only to find out they don’t take my insurance and I would have to pay out of pocket then have my insurance reimburse me. It took a lot of researching to find this dentist. Back to square one.

 

[Imapparentlyhere]

@rhager Hopefully you do manage to find a dentist. Well done for calling though!

 

[Dg6300]

Back to square one.

Bravo! Well done. I’m glad you made that call.

And, if I may, I’d like to disagree with you:

You are not back at square one. At worst you are at square two.

If there are ten “squares”, you’re probably at the fourth and maybe fifth. You’re farther than you realize.

Please do keep us posted.

 

[rhager]

Thanks, I’ll continue to push forward. I emailed another dentist but probably won’t hear back from them until Monday.

 

[Enarete]

Hey rhager, well done on making that call! I know it didn't end up like you wished it would, but you made a huge step. I agree with @Dg6300 - you're not to square one. Because having that email contact and making that call provided you with a good experience and next time will be easier.

Btw. I am wondering whether there may be even a better practice for you, someone who can be more sensitive towards your fears. It's not a secret that people are scared to make that call so sending an anxious person a message telling them to call.. well.. doesn't sound like they went the extra mile if you know what I mean?
Nowadays dentists are happy to call you to help or to do an email consultation to reassure you.

Fingers crossed with the other dentist. Keep us posted!

 

[rhager]

I’m still on the search for a dentist, not having much luck. I found one that I really wanted to see but they are all booked up until November.

 

[champ]

@rhager You could ask if they have a cancellation list and if they do, ask them to let you know if there's a cancellation?

I'd make the Nov. appointment just to know it's there and then keep looking. You can always cancel if you find someone else.

 

[rhager]

Hello. I finally made an appointment. I have a consultation in two weeks. I’m quite nervous. I was expecting them to tell they could see me in a couple months. At least it’s a start. I’m sure I will have extensive work that needs to be done.

 

[rhager]

I have had a couple breakdowns as I get closer to my appointment. 40% of me wants to cancel. I know I have to see this through. I have an underbite and really embarrassed I never got it taken care of. I thinking the unknown of what could happen is the scary thing.

 

[letsconnect]

@rhager it may help to think of this appointment as a job interview - this is your opportunity to "interview" a prospective dentist and see if you'd like to hire them for the job

 

[rhager]

Well I made through the appointment but now I have to see a periodontist. I’m having a hard time finding one that takes my insurance. The dentist referred me to one but they are not on my provider list. I live in a major city and there are not that many on that list. Not sure which way to turn now. On the plus side I only had a small filling that I had to make an appointment for.