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Do Dentists or Dental Assistants Dislike Anxious Patients?

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overbitestinks93

Member
Joined
Feb 11, 2017
Messages
25
I met my new dentist about 3 months after my last cleaning due to a chipped tooth that got worse after a dentist ignored it. So I ended up having to have all 4 or my lower incisors filed/rebuilt as I've mentioned here before.

Anyway, the teeth I had fixed are feeling really raw/sensitive in between and new the gum line. They scheduled my cleaning in May and I'm nervous about it, because I'm afraid the gums/teeth aren't supposed to feel like this 1 month after I had them filled. I never was anxious about anything dental related until I realized my dentist ignored more than just my one chipped tooth and that I had more damage. Now, this will be the first time I'm anxious about going in for a cleaning. (usually I found them relaxing growing up)

This leads me to the main subject of the post. Do you think the dental assistants and dentists dislike me, considering my first 2 appointments with them I was very anxious? I know the dental assistant I had for the first one kept saying, "you're doing good" and "you were so brave". I remember the one at the second appointment was the dentist's wife and she was making jokes like, "I see you tapping your feet....are you a dancer?" (I wiggle my feet when I'm nervous) and she said "good job, bud" and "you were so brave" like the other assistant. The dentist himself didn't say anything during it other than ask if I was feeling ok

I'm just wondering if I made a bad impression on them with how anxious I was even with laughing gas. I remember when I called back a few days later asking if I needed a special toothpaste for my fillings and the assistant answered saying I was their favorite patient. I was thinking that was sarcasm though and wondering if I was a difficult patient for them. (considering even though I was quiet, I still was visibly anxious even with the laughing gas). I got the impression with how the staff treated me during the procedures that they are very caring, but I wondered if they thought I was a difficult patient.

Does anyone have any input? Thanks everyone.
 
Sevena

Sevena

Super Moderator
Joined
Jun 24, 2012
Messages
833
Location
UK
Why would they dislike you? It sounds like you put up with the treatment very peacefully! They certainly wouldn't dislike you just for being nervous. Especially as most people are at least a little nervous at the dentist. I imagine patients who have full-blown panic attacks are more difficult to treat, but I can't imagine dentists dislike them either - a good dentist knows it's hardly someone's fault if they panic.

I imagine they were being serious when they said you are their favourite patient. :)
 
O

overbitestinks93

Member
Joined
Feb 11, 2017
Messages
25
Why would they dislike you? It sounds like you put up with the treatment very peacefully! They certainly wouldn't dislike you just for being nervous. Especially as most people are at least a little nervous at the dentist. I imagine patients who have full-blown panic attacks are more difficult to treat, but I can't imagine dentists dislike them either - a good dentist knows it's hardly someone's fault if they panic.

I imagine they were being serious when they said you are their favourite patient. :)
Thank you. I just feel like such a wimp and like I'm being a burden. During the appointment I remember breathing heavily before they reminded me to take deep breaths through my nose. I only do this when I'm really anxious and it didn't used to be that way with the dentist until I heard I needed the 4 teeth rebuilt. Now I'm questioning not only the old dentist that ignored me, but nervous to trust any dentist (even my current one who actually saw the problem I was having with those teeth).
 
T

Thephilsblogbar

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 23, 2015
Messages
771
Location
United Kingdom
My dentist and her assistant know I am anxious about my appointments, she knows I would not see anybody else unless it an emergecy not to see anybody else in the pratice. When she was going away she arranaged my appointment to see her and not anybody else in the pratice, one dentist is far too rough in the pratice she my Dads dentist even though he got false teeth, one I saw for emergecy she has a fantastic bed side manner which I needed.

I do have a learning disability so I do get nervous.

Dentist know patients get anxious
 
O

overbitestinks93

Member
Joined
Feb 11, 2017
Messages
25
My dentist and her assistant know I am anxious about my appointments, she knows I would not see anybody else unless it an emergecy not to see anybody else in the pratice. When she was going away she arranaged my appointment to see her and not anybody else in the pratice, one dentist is far too rough in the pratice she my Dads dentist even though he got false teeth, one I saw for emergecy she has a fantastic bed side manner which I needed.

I do have a learning disability so I do get nervous.

Dentist know patients get anxious
That's awesome that you have a dentist that cares that much. For me it was good and bad to get a new dentist. It was good that I found a really caring dental team that finally took care of the chipped teeth that my dentist ignored. However, it was bad because I now am having to rebuild my trust in dentists again due to my old one ignoring the problems I was having for so long. Especially since they found problems that my old dentist didn't even know existed and that I had cavities in between my front teeth and not just the 2 chipped front teeth. That has made me more scared of going to the dentist and scared that I am going to lose my teeth. So, on the plus side I got a dentist who listens to me and a staff that cares, but I'm now more afraid to go than I used to be. (I'm really anxious to go back for my cleaning in 2 months because the gums in front and behind the 4 front teeth that were filled feel "raw" and the composite fillings and my gums both taste like metal which I'm afraid is also bad. I just want my old teeth and wish my dentist would've listened to me 7 years ago. :shame:
 
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T

Tink

Well-known member
Joined
May 14, 2013
Messages
755
Location
UK
For me it was good and bad to get a new dentist.
...
I now am having to rebuild my trust in dentists again
...
So, on the plus side I got a dentist who listens to me and a staff that cares, but I'm now more afraid to go than I used to be.
OK, I get this. I can relate to all of these bits!

I've been there - going to a new dentist, finally landing with a really good one that cares and wants to help, but finding that somehow my fears got worse instead of better. For me, it was like an unravelling, all the fears were suddenly let out because it was safe to - while before I would suppress them and just sort of white-knuckle it. It's like opening a massive can of worms that you hadn't known was there. There was a lot of learning stuff where my old dentist had gone wrong and I just didn't realise too, that was hard to deal with.

Having been there, what can I say?

Well, it does get easier. I promise, it does. I won't say I'm cured (I'm not, woke up this morning worrying about dentists!), but it does get easier with time as you build up that trust. You can work through your fears, one at a time. There's light at the end of the tunnel.

The big thing to remember is that you're not doing this on your own. Nobody expects you to! You have a supportive dental team there to help you, that really makes a difference. And you have us here to support you. So it might feel like the problems are bigger than you ever realised, but the help is bigger too.

You'll get there - and over time, the trust does come and you end up in a better place than where you started.

---

Re your original post - just wanted to echo what the others have said, dentists know lots of people have trouble with this, they will be used to seeing people struggle, and there's absolutely no reason to think that they would dislike you for it. In my experience, those good dentists - the ones who are really supportive - actually want to help and really get a lift from helping anxious patients deal with their fears. They will understand, and as far as they're concerned it's their job to help you.
 
O

overbitestinks93

Member
Joined
Feb 11, 2017
Messages
25
OK, I get this. I can relate to all of these bits!

I've been there - going to a new dentist, finally landing with a really good one that cares and wants to help, but finding that somehow my fears got worse instead of better. For me, it was like an unravelling, all the fears were suddenly let out because it was safe to - while before I would suppress them and just sort of white-knuckle it. It's like opening a massive can of worms that you hadn't known was there. There was a lot of learning stuff where my old dentist had gone wrong and I just didn't realise too, that was hard to deal with.

Having been there, what can I say?

Well, it does get easier. I promise, it does. I won't say I'm cured (I'm not, woke up this morning worrying about dentists!), but it does get easier with time as you build up that trust. You can work through your fears, one at a time. There's light at the end of the tunnel.

The big thing to remember is that you're not doing this on your own. Nobody expects you to! You have a supportive dental team there to help you, that really makes a difference. And you have us here to support you. So it might feel like the problems are bigger than you ever realised, but the help is bigger too.

You'll get there - and over time, the trust does come and you end up in a better place than where you started.

---

Re your original post - just wanted to echo what the others have said, dentists know lots of people have trouble with this, they will be used to seeing people struggle, and there's absolutely no reason to think that they would dislike you for it. In my experience, those good dentists - the ones who are really supportive - actually want to help and really get a lift from helping anxious patients deal with their fears. They will understand, and as far as they're concerned it's their job to help you.
Exactly. It was really hard learning that my other dentist had completely ignored those teeth to the point where the even had to drill down to the bottom front of them and put bonding on. Now my gums still feel like they are pushed up/out and swollen almost 6 weeks later. I'm hoping things get better and that I can build up the trust again.
 
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