• Dental Phobia Support

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Don't know if I can cope with this again



Junior member
Jan 15, 2013
Hi, feeling really down :( after yrs of being a full on phobic, I managed to get treatment, get my phobia under control and sort all my tooth problems out. I vowed to never go back to suffering tooth ache, abcsess's and all the worry that goes with it. I was very nearly a success story and yet here I am again, in pain. I have an abcsess, pain, a clicky crown and all fear is back. I also used to suffer bad ocd and depression...these have returned too. I don't want to see anyone, talk to anyone, I just want to sleep. My business is suffering, my partner feels like I've withdrawn....I just can't cope with all the worry again. I have an appointment with Lincoln Hirst, but due to my job its not until april and I just don't know if I can deal with the anxiety in the meantime :(
Aw bless you sweetie - when one thing seems to be wrong, so do so many others, and that just makes us feel even worse - pain heightens things even more and tbf (to be fair) not the best of things to be happening along with everything else.

I don't know what job you do, and I know things are really tough in the job market now with allowing time for appointments etc, but at the end of the day, you will end up being off a lot longer than the time for an appointment or two if you don't get things sorted.

I am sure Lincoln will do all he can to see you as soon as he can, and I think that it may be a good idea to speak to both your employer and Lincoln to try to get something sorted that will be not only fitting in with them, but with you also.

Let me know how you get along. And say hi to Lincoln when you see him, he treated me, and can only sing :whistle: his praises :)

Hi Kim, thank you for your reply. Its work, finances and fear that led me to delay with the appointment, and. I'm on holiday in two weeks. Tbh I don't even know if I can pluck up the courage to see him in april :(
Bless you sweetie

Well, I would sort of suggest you read my thread, but it would take you a lifetime to do that, as Carole has said on more than one occasion :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:

Have you spoken to Lincoln? If not, then it might be an idea to, he is more than happy to speak to you, and would really, truly not mind having a chat with you - honestly, he is the best, and I truly would not be saying that if I didn't fully believe it.

With him and Jean, his nurse, you will be in the best possible hands. They are not at all like 'dentisty' people - they have the 'human' element to them. Jean hates shopping, and loves horses - never in my lifetime did I ever think I would have contact with someone in the dentistry 'trade' who did 'normal' type things.

If you can't pluck up the courage to ring and speak to Lincoln, e-mail the practice, leave your number, he will get back to you, you will go all jelly like, and then understand where I am coming from :)

More hugs sweetie, here if you need, and if you don't xx
If kim is talking about the Lincoln , the dentist who answers questions on here, he seems like a very caring, understanding, gentle type soul..I guess he wouldn't waste his time on here if he didn't care about people...Don't be afraid....Listen to Kim;)
I am lillyh and he did all my treatment - not only a good dentist but a bloomin' lovely, genuine - if not sometimes cheeky (birdie song) sort of guy ;)
Morning both of you :) thank you for your reassuring replies. It is "that" Lincoln and we have had a conversation via email (I'm very nervous on the phone). He does sound lovely and has been very accommodating to what I feel I need. You know what its like though...on one hand the rational part of your brain is saying "it will be fine, you have nothing to worry about" and then the other part is going "the I.V sedation won't work, you'll lose all your teeth, you'll be in pain, he won't want you as a patient..bla bla bla".

Kim, how is he different from others ? And what's the surgery like....I've tried to find some photos online, but there's none of the inside.

I think I just feel so let down from previous people. I won't go into detail here, but I've not had much luck with medical procedures, from being pinned down to have stitches without anaesthetic as a child, to..well other stuff. Lincoln knows. I don't think I will ever lose my phobia, so now I'm just looking for a long term dentist to treat me well. I just want to be cared for whilst receiving my treatment. I have endured so much throughout my life, and yes I fully believe in "what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger" but I believe it does leave you with a fragility which never goes away.

I'm sorry for rambling on. This is the only place I can be anonymous and say how I really feel.
Morning hun

I can only really compare Lincoln to three other dentists I have ever seen in all my years, and two of them were when I started on my 'journey'. The dentist I had as a child was a nightmare, not a friendly approachable person, and one who poo poo'd me when I told him he was hurting me.

The other two that I went to prior to finding Lincoln. The first a very loud NHS dentist who has been in practice for years. He was fully aware of my absolute 'petrifiedness' (I know it is not a proper word, but hey ho, says what I want it to ;) ) but didn't stop him bellowing out my name in the waiting room, telling me he knew all about me (one of my friends has a friend who is the manager of the surgery, hence knowing all about little old me)! And stomping up the stairs to the surgery with a big 'satellite receiver' strapped to his head while I almost fell back down the stairs quivering so much. Getting in the chair and almost immediately 'going at me' with the 'picky' thing, only to be told that I couldn't have that touch me.

Second dentist - said all the things I 'wanted' to hear in a calmer way, but something just didn't sit right with both the practice, him and his nurse, and then I found Lincoln.

He rang me, and believe me I was as nervous as could be. He chatted, I listened. I don't even know how or who made the appointment. All I know is that it was made and I went. He talks in a very calming manner, didn't make my first 'stop' in thechair, and just went through everything with a fine tooth comb -sorry for the pun :).

Prior to going to him, he sent me a questionnaire and asked me to fill it in. He had that to look through and it was in black and white as to how I felt about everything. After some time, Lincoln asked if I felt ready to sit in the chair, although he had made it quite clear that this didn't need to happen on this visit, but by this stage, I had already had a rude introduction to it, so this was a bit of a doddle.

He told me that there was no need to use the 'pokey' thing, and all he did was look and take loads of x-rays. He also told me that he fully believed in telling you what to expect at each and every visit, and that the next time we would meet, there would be no treatment, just discussion as to how we went forward, and believe you me, that in itself took a whole load of pressure off.

Now, the surgery itself. It is a fair sized reception area. You walk in the door and the receptionists are in front of you a bit to your left. Chairs are all around the surgery. It is not 'flash or fancy' and certainly not intimidating. There is a door to your right when you walk in and that is where the surgeries are. Lincoln's - unless he has changed it, is the first door on your left as you go through the initial door. Lincoln's surgery itself is bright and compact, with a whole wall full of thank you cards. It of course does have 'dentisty' things on show - wouldn't not be able to, but the warmth and kindness of both Lincoln and Jean take your mind off of all that as much as is possible.

I so fully understand where you are coming from with having been dealt a lot throughout your life and the fragility you are left with. Lincoln absolutely loves his job. And along with his passion for his job, goes such a caring side to help us phobics along.

If it helps, you can park in the car park at the back of the surgery if you can't face sitting in the waiting room and either Jean or Lincoln will come and get you.

I don't know how else I can try to get across that Lincoln and Jean will do all they can to get you through all of this. They both know their stuff, so be guided by what they say and reassured by the help they are able to offer.

I don't know if you have anyone to go with you, and I know on all but one of my appointments, I had company with me, but I did even manage one on my own which was an enormous mountain I climbed, but I did it, and felt better for it.

I am hopeful you will get to your appointment, and in the meantime, am again more than happy to answer any questions you have if I possibly can.

Now, that's me rambling...... famous for it :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:

Big hugs hunni xoxoxo:XXLhug:
Hi Kim, thank you :) I just can't believe I've gone from being a regular dentist attendee, where if I noticed the slightest problem I would go straight back...to one who is so nervous again. I feel like I'm back at square 1 :( Are you still a patient of his ?

Also, did you have I.V sedation with him?

Xx Pootle (not my real name, but I'm worried about being identified on here)
I can speak from personal experience as I have also been treated by Lincoln. He's one of the genuine ones, and I don't say that lightly - I'm the biggest cynic going! I have a very complicated medical history and have been living with a spinal cord tumour for the last 4.5 years, therefore I've dealt with countless medical professionals right across the board.

When I first went to see Lincoln I was petrified because I thought I was going to lose all my teeth. I won't go into too much detail as it's a bit tedious and long-winded, but I'd had almost constant toothache in every bottom tooth. I spent about an hour and a half talking about what exactly was going on and Lincoln took notes the whole time. It was the longest consultation I've ever had - even private hospital consultants don't spend that much time with a patient. Like with Kim, he listened to all my fears and the reasons behind them; he was in no way 'pushy' or trying to hurry me along.

The second time I was sick!!! Not because of Lincoln, I hasten to add, but due to the cocktail of pain killers I was on (along with an empty stomach). That time I had to have a mouthguard fitted and I didn't think I was going to get through it.

You've definitely done the right thing by making this appointment. Trust me. Most dentists (in my opinion!) are primarily out for making money and will just try and sell you a load of stuff you don't need, but you have picked the right one here. As Kim has said if you do want further re-assurance I'm sure Lincoln would not mind if you dropped him an e-mail beforehand. He is very approachable and I have written to him many times. Again, not many doctors are prepared to do this and you are lucky to even get a phone call from a secretary!

I should also add that Lincoln is very knowledgeable as well as nice! You are in safe hands.
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There you go Pootle

Two reassurances, and a lovely dentist who should be really proud to have such glowing recommendations.

Chess, sorry to hear of your medical problems, and I truly hope things are going well for you, both health wise and dental wise.

And you are right, Lincoln is one of the genuine one's - how lucky are we :)