embarrased & ashamed- I search for courage

[Sagimusician]

I couldn't get to sleep last night. I lied in bed thinking about how bad the deteriorated state my teeth are in. And the more I thought about it the more I became stricken with fear and embarrassment. But today I decided to search for courage. Fortunately it didn't take long for me to find this forum. After reading many of the posts here, I became a bit relieved. Relieved to find out that I'm not the only one suffering. Relieved to find out that others share my same feelings of fear and embarrassment. Tears flowed from my eyes uncontrollably as I read post after post; tears from the resembling pain of others like myself and yet, at the same time, tears of relief. Like some of the others have mentioned, my teeth have become so bad that I'm afraid to smile and when I laugh or even yawn, I'm quick to cover my mouth with my hand. Its difficult to eat and I'm only able to eat on one side of my mouth. I don't suffer from much physical pain anymore, but the mental and emotional damage is unparalleled. And I've grown weary of this. I don't want to have to worry about the embarrassment of someone seeing my teeth anymore. I don't want to have to worry about smiling anymore. I want my life back. But I still have a long ways to go. I'm a full-time student so finances are just one of the many issues to be dealt with. This site has given me courage and the want to do something about it finally, but it's going to take a lot more courage for me to actually get it done.

Thanks to all of you who've posted your story here- you've been an inspiration to me and a source of courage and support. I hope to find enough to see me through to the end.

 

[takingflight]

Hi Sagimusician and  !

You mention courage throughout your post and I hope you realize that it takes courage to take those first few steps to acknowledge you should go, to research and to read and post here.  That is how many of us started and slowly, with the encouragement of others and our own determination we got through each course of our dental journey.  You have already made such a big step that I have no doubt you'll be posting a success story in no time!  

The emotions you go through when you finally face the fear is so overwhelming.  It was odd to be terrified and nervous yet have a twinge of excitement at the though of not having to cover your smile or take pills to cover up toothaches.  I think the best part of it was finding this site and realizing that there were so many others of all ages in all parts of the world going through the very same thing.  Just having a few other people tell me I could do it and was going to be o.k. really helped me to believe it.

Finances are an unfortunate issue but if you find the right dentist you can often work something out to have things taken care of in phases.  In the US there are credit options such as carecredit that offer low to no interest rate depending upon the amount and payoff time.  You may also be one of those people who find that things aren't nearly as bad as they seem and the work will be less than you are imagining.  

We are glad you joined and look forward to helping you a long the way.  You can do this and you are going to be just fine!!!  

Pam

 

[jo06jojo]

AWESOME!!!!

Good for you. I had the same experience - there are others like me?

Finally started getting the work I need done. Baby steps for me. This year, I am going to put money into a flex account at work for medical needs because both kids need braces and I am determined for all of us to be smiling soon and to take a family portrait.

I thought that my "condition" was going to require much more work. My dentist is totally optimistic. I don't see how, but he didn't seem to think it was all that bad.

Good luck. You wil get plenty of support through all of us who have gone through the same thing. You can do it, if I can.

 

[vict4ia]

You are absolutely not alone. As others have said, the most painful part of the whole experience for many of us was facing the fear head on and finally fighting back. Regardless of the condition of your mouth (most likely it's not as bad as you think), rest assured that you're going to be just fine.

 

[mrpanic]

Yea I agree with Vicie. But mate dont be ashamed of your mouth thats how I feel my mate detests my mouth n feel ill looking at me, I turn and look the other way when ime talking to others I cant smile in public n when I do people say eeey my god look at his teeth. Its all about time mate there aint out you can do but stop beating youself up bout ya teeth you cant help it. I know its earlie days for you but when you do want summit doing wit your teeth then why not just go see a dentist have a talk tell em your fears etc. If they choose to help you then thats good cos you can say to them please dont do the things that freak me out or make em relax you with great chit chat or jokes. BUT a misserable dentist is our worst knightmare all you will do then is loose ya rag tell him or her to go n get stuffed, this you don't need. You will always find a caring dentist somehwere just keep phonin or poppin off to see one more or less test the surface you dont have to stay if you dont like the chair or the dentist himself/her. BTW dont push ya self as said its earlie days for you! When the time is right you will know mate. The first step is the hardest let us all tell you that one!!

CYA
BUDDY

 

[Sagimusician]

thanks all for you kind encouraging words. and i agree with you mrpanic, timing is everything and when the time is right, i'll do it. i just hope my time is soon though.

 

[mikey]

ill send some positive vibes your way

it wont be as bad as yout think, you should go ahead and make a consulation appointment where all you do is talk to the dentist to get a feel for him/her and see if its the right one for you. It should relieve your anxiety about the visit too

best of wishes
-mikey

 

[lotus]

Hi Sagimusician!

Just wanted to say   you're not alone.

It will take time for you to get there, but you can do it. I found when I first started thinking about the dentist, posting on this board was great, because it made me want to make an appointment so I could post something successful on here! Finding this forum was one of the hardest steps, I sat crying in front of the monitor for ages when I finally realised I wasn't alone.  

It will take courage but you've taken the first step, you're on the road to smiles now.  

Lotus