Fear of going to the dentist

[Kelly1965]

Hi, I'm on the site just for support and maybe tips on how I can gain the courage to go to the dentist. I am 52 and I honestly cannot remember the last time I was at the dentist. Reasons being...no dental insurance and the fact that I am very, very afraid. Yes, I did have a bad experience when I was I believe 12-13 and I remember having a dam in my mouth and I was crying because I could feel what the dentist was doing. The dentist grabbed my head with his two hands and banged my head on the chair several times. I told my Mom but she did not believe me at all. I am the type of person to leave the past in the past. I have to say that this has never left my memory. For me, the reason why I am afraid is of the pain. My mouth is one big infection. I have teeth that have broken off. Several cavities. I live in pain. I would rather suffer that put myself through the torture. However, I know that this is something that has to been done and I have insurance now so I want to take advantage of this opportunity. I have made two separate appointments with two different dentists. I never went to either appointment. I am so embarrassed as well. How do I do this? Is it possible to be put to sleep while my teeth are being cleaned or having any other work done?
Thanks much

 

[Sevena]

Wow, what a horrible experience! I'm not surprised you have trauma from that - anyone would.

The good news is that dentistry is a lot better now. Most dentists are trained to help nervous patients, and most are compassionate and willing to take their time with you. Another thing to remember that might help you get past your fear is that you are an adult now, not a child. You are in full control. If a dentist makes you feel bad, you can leave, and never have to see them again.

The best thing to do is to talk to a dentist about your fears before they examine you. Explain your past, ask if you can arrange a signal (raising a hand is a common one) for if you need a break to breathe and sip some water. You can ask them to go slow and talk you through it. No request is too much. Their job is to provide you healthcare, and you deserve the best, just like anyone else.

IV sedation is a common tool to help people get through procedures. This will put you in a very sleepy and relaxed state. Many people don't remember the procedure at all afterwards, and feel like they took a nap. It's very safe.

Lastly, don't be ashamed of your teeth. Your dentist has guaranteed seen worse. I too had many broken down teeth when I went to the dentist to get treatment, and I was only 25! But no one acted surprised, or rude, and no one said anything to shame me.

It's always much worse in our heads than it is in real life. I promise you can do this.