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Fear or the fear

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Susan Horsley

Junior member
Joined
May 22, 2020
Messages
4
Location
England
The last time I had a filling au had a bad experience. She numbered me up and did a scale and polish while waiting for it all to go numb. The first filling was easy, really small and only took a few minutes. The second one, when she had drilled a little and used either a blower/ water spray I felt it, and jumped. I told her I felt it so she did a nerve block. I could still feel it. She told me off every time I flinched and got really cross. I was pretty anxious the whole time but got more and more panicky as it went on.
My fear is that I was just so anxious I imagined the pain, and in the future I’ll have the same experience. I worry I’ll be so anxious I’ll imagine pain. I panic even thinking about having work done. Any help or advice would really help. I have since found a really lovely dentist who is supportive.

edited to add I have birth with gas and air and one dose of pethadine, the midwife said she’d never seen anyone so composed under pain, no yelling. I’m a pretty together human being but this dental thing has knocked me sideways.
 
Last edited:
Hi Susan,

sorry to read about your past experience with the filling. Experiencing discomfort, pain and anxiety during a treatment is such a vulnerable place to be and any negative reaction on the dentist's side can really make things worse and even lead to complete avoidance in the future.

It sounds to me like the past dentist managed to convince you that you made up the pain. It is a fact that if we are stressed, we are a bit more aware of sensations and maybe more prepared to feel things, but you can't imagine pain when there is none. The story you described sounds more like a dentist who failed at numbing you properly and then blamed you for it. I see how this makes it hard for you to trust a dentist again and it's great to read that you have found someone lovely supportive.

So now with a lovely dentist, the best idea might be to have a chat with them and share about your past experience and your fears. Let them explain to you how they can make sure you will stay comfortable during the treatment and what can be done should you feel anything. The key thing here is to get the reassurance that your dentist won't do the treatment until you're numbed up properly and won't blame you for feeling something.

You can find a great article about numbing here. It explains possible reasons for feeling pain despite numbing and most importantly, some solutions to that. Hope this article can convince you that you that firstly, it wasn't you imagining pain that wasn't there and secondly, that failed numbing with one dentist at one visit doesn't mean it will happen again.

All the best wishes
 
Hi Susan,

I second every word Enarete said. Here is a video about fear of pain during a dental appointment which is relevant to your story:
In the future, you could ask the dentist to check whether the anesthesia has taken full effect or not, by provoking any sensation from the tooth without drilling, for example by touching it with something cold or tapping on the tooth (if the tooth had no root canal treatment). A well numbed tooth should not feel pain or cold.
 
I have difficulty getting and staying numb. My fear started similar to yours, except I was a kid, and the dentist was pulling baby teeth that wouldn’t come out on their own. He didn’t believe me that I could feel it, and kept telling me it was just pressure. I developed a terrible fear of anything dental procedure related.
When I had to have my first dental procedure as an adult, I told the dentist right up front that I had difficulty getting numb and that it seemed to fade quickly. Some dentists have responded better than others but appreciate the heads up. My current dentist checks my gums with a poly instrument before starting. If I can feel it, he gives me another shot.
So going along with the others, chat with your dentist about your fear and experiences.
 
Hi there!
So sorry for your awful past experience! As the others have said, you did not imagine the pain and just because it happened once, does not mean that it will happen again. If your pain had been imagined, then you probably would have felt pain with both fillings, not just the one. Sometimes, getting numb is less straight forward than you would think. Shame on that dentist for making you feel badly for flinching when you are already in a vulnerable position. I am glad that you have found someone kind and supportive now. I have had trouble getting numb in the past (especially on my bottom teeth) so I can relate to how frustrating and anxiety producing it can be. The key is having a dentist who respects your stop signal and is generous with local anesthetic.
 
Susan ,

You already got some great advice and support from everyone already, but just wanted to empathize and say I'm sorry that dentist was so harsh and cross with you when you felt pain. I've had the experience myself where I've felt pain due to the dentist not giving the anesthetic right or enough , and sometimes that happens but its not your fault if you feel pain and they should be concerned and make you feel better . Not shame you and be cross.

That would make me scared to go back again too.

I do hope you can get a kind dentist that is willing to listen and pay top attention to your pain and validate your thoughts and experiences . Just really sorry this happened to you!!
 
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