Feelings of loss and living with tooth implant questions

[reincs]

Hello, english is not my first language so apologies if I'm not very clear.
I am 26 years old and 2 years ago I lost my first upper left molar due to my carelesness, because a filling fell out of it and I didn't bother going to the dentist to check it because it didn't hurt, only going after a piece of it fell, at wich point it was unsalvageable (Learn from me, if the tooth doesn't hurt go anyway!). Seeing as an implant is considered by many as the option that most resemblences look and feel of a natural tooth, I am opting for it but due to various problems I had to postpone it to an unforseeable future.

Ever since that event and the following 2 years I have been thinking constantly about my missing molar, about how much of an idiot I was for not going to replace the filling as soon as I noticed, about how much less I am compared to my friends who all have all of their natural teeth except for me, about how this is a before and after in my life, as from now on In the future I will have a fake tooth screwed in my mouth.
Regardless, compared to having no tooth, the implant is kind of "a line at the end of the tunnel" for me, I'm hoping that after having it placed things could return as they were before but I am also afraid of a saying that I heard very commonly from dentists "An implant is the next best thing to a tooth but it will never be as good", this prospect really scares me.

So I have a couple of questions that I hope people with experience living with implants could answer.
1.- Do you treat it like a normal tooth? this is my major concern, I am afraid that having an implant will permanently alter how I have been treating my molar and by extent how I live my life, that it will be something that I will always have to be mindful about, wether I am eating or brushing.
2.- About the feeling of the implant. I have read stories of people with implants that say that they even forget that they even have an implant, heck, even some that say that despite the implant having no nerves, that they even retain some sensation on it due to the gums and the other tooth nearby, so it's pretty much the same as another molar to them. Is this true for you? Because this has been a major consolation for me beacuse I am afraid that as the implant will be replacing my replacing first molar (the most used one), that everytime I eat something it will feel like biting into a rock when my molars make contact.
3.- The idea of having a foreign object such as a metal screw in my skull supposedly for the rest of my days really disturbs me, how did you come to terms with that? do you feel like you have a foreign object inside your skull all the time?
4.- Is it essential to floss your implant? I heard that flossing an implant badly could destroy the union between the implant and the gums wich could lead to infection so I am afraid of doing it when I have mine placed, I even remember some site saying that if you are not gonna do it well burshing alone could also do, also, some say that when you floss your implant you dont floss the tooth part but the post under it, and I can't explain well in english but the Idea of flossing the metal under my gums disturbs me and would remind me of my fake molar so I rather avoid it (It's silly I know but I can't help it). So, do you floss yours?

All of these questions basically boil down to: Will my life outlook permanently change after having an implant?
Sorry if it was too long or unclear, and I may have repeated myself a couple of times but I honestly am at my wits end, I have been really stressing over my mouth and it's future over these two years and I just want my life back, and I really hope that an implant could make me go back to the times were I live and bite without concern.

 

[MountainMama]

I had all my teeth until two years ago. I had a crown replaced (the only crown I had at that point) and it started a whole series of dental issues. I ended up losing both my first and second lower molars on the right. Unrelated to that, I had my upper front tooth abscess from a childhood injury and I ended up losing that one as well after failed root canals. So now I have three implants.
I will tell you that they do not feel like rocks when you chew. My 2nd molar implant feels just like a real tooth...I have sensation in the gums around it. When I eat something cold the gums feel it so it feels normal. I have had a little issue with my gums being too sensitive around the first molar implant so it actually feels more like a regular tooth.
I am still getting used to the front tooth implant, to be honest. It isn’t that it doesn’t feel like a real tooth...it just feels odd still. I will say that crown was not quite the right color and size and I am actually getting it redone next week so that may help. It does feel nice to have my “teeth” back again though!
As far as flossing goes, I was told to floss all the way under the crown, up against the post. To be honest, it is weird at first but it gets to where it feels normal. The crowns curve so you don’t go “under” them. You don’t really notice other than the floss stops at a certain point. You feel the floss against your gums just like when you floss with a real tooth. You do have to be careful what type of floss you use. Use one of the tape kind that is flat, like Oral B glide, so that you don’t get pieces stuck around the crown. I would definitely recommend flossing, though. Don’t skip it. Little bits of food do get stuck under the crown, just like they do between real teeth.
You don’t think of them as foreign objects after you get used to them.

 

[reincs]

Thank you very much for answering! Your experience really eases my mind, It's nice to know that implants are the way to go to get as close to home as posible.
Guess there is no running from flossing, don't get me wrong I take my dental health VERY seriously but I had hoped I could avoid flossing just in this case, but if flossing the implant feels like flossing the other teeth as you say I guess it's not so bad.
Thanks again for taking the time to answer and good luck with the redoing of your front tooth, I hope all goes well!

 

[geos]

Since you are getting an implant for a molar, one major difference is that you will go from multiple roots to a single implant. This will make the feeling of flossing a bit different. In my case, I feel I often get food caught there that will need flossing to get it out. It feels different at first but you get used to it.

 

[Enarete]

All of these questions basically boil down to: Will my life outlook permanently change after having an implant?
Sorry if it was too long or unclear, and I may have repeated myself a couple of times but I honestly am at my wits end, I have been really stressing over my mouth and it's future over these two years and I just want my life back, and I really hope that an implant could make me go back to the times were I live and bite without concern.

Hi reincs ,

first of all, don't worry about your English, we have many members who are not native speakers (me included). You voiced your concerns very clearly.

I was sorry to read how much your life seems to have changed since your extraction. It particularly strikes me that you seem to build your whole self-esteem (or a lack of it) based on this missing molar - you mentioned feeling less than your friends who haven't missing teeth.

You already got some replies about how an implant feels and it sounds like this eased your mind a bit, which is good. I don't have implants myself, but know many many people who have and they do not seem to be thinking of it 24/7 or be bothered at all.

Now I would like to say "you will be fine", but I guess the implant will always be only as ok for you as you are with yourself. It can feel like a normal tooth as much as it wants to, but if you still hold on to defeating yourself and regretting what happened two years ago, then you will always only see the implant as a reminder of that. It is less about the objective properties of an implant or the care of it, but more about how you feel about it. I am not mentioning this to discourage you but only to give you a different perspective. My feel is that you are looking for something that makes your loss undone and something that allows you to avoid remembering it which I am not sure the implant will fulfil for you. Besides that, avoidance is never a good approach and works only temporarily.

I know it can be hard to accept the past or what we believe are our "failures", but if you manage to do it, you can have an implant that replaces your old tooth, be still able to take care of it as implants are supposed to be taken care of (flossing it and keeping it extra clean) and finally get back the life you had..

What do you think?

 

[reincs]

Hi reincs ,

first of all, don't worry about your English, we have many members who are not native speakers (me included). You voiced your concerns very clearly.

I was sorry to read how much your life seems to have changed since your extraction. It particularly strikes me that you seem to build your whole self-esteem (or a lack of it) based on this missing molar - you mentioned feeling less than your friends who haven't missing teeth.

You already got some replies about how an implant feels and it sounds like this eased your mind a bit, which is good. I don't have implants myself, but know many many people who have and they do not seem to be thinking of it 24/7 or be bothered at all.

Now I would like to say "you will be fine", but I guess the implant will always be only as ok for you as you are with yourself. It can feel like a normal tooth as much as it wants to, but if you still hold on to defeating yourself and regretting what happened two years ago, then you will always only see the implant as a reminder of that. It is less about the objective properties of an implant or the care of it, but more about how you feel about it. I am not mentioning this to discourage you but only to give you a different perspective. My feel is that you are looking for something that makes your loss undone and something that allows you to avoid remembering it which I am not sure the implant will fulfil for you. Besides that, avoidance is never a good approach and works only temporarily.

I know it can be hard to accept the past or what we believe are our "failures", but if you manage to do it, you can have an implant that replaces your old tooth, be still able to take care of it as implants are supposed to be taken care of (flossing it and keeping it extra clean) and finally get back the life you had..

What do you think?

Hello Enarete. Thank you kindly for not mincing your words and saying what you thought about the matter because your comment really opened my eyes to how I have been acting and I didn't notice, I truly mean it, re-reading my words today on the context of what you said really put to light to me how full of regret I was when I wrote it, and you're right, I can't help beating myself over the loss of my molar, how it's gone forever, and how an implant will "undo" my mistake.

Like you said, maybe getting back to how I was before, without worries and carefree, is more up to me and how big of a deal I am making out of my missing molar than the implant, and it may start by simply taking things as they happen and pushing on, I know it's easier said than done, and I don't know much it will take for me to change this defeatist outlook I have of always looking back but at least thanks to you I know that I do it.