• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone with a fear of the dentist, dental phobia, or specific dental fears.

    It's a supportive space to talk to people with similar experiences, and get advice and information.

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First dental visit in years

J

Jlb9

Junior member
Joined
Nov 21, 2018
Messages
1
Good day. I’m new here and I’m looking for encouragement.
I haven’t been to the dentist in 5 years.
At that appointment she informed me that I needed a molar pulled. She was going to refer me because at the time I was very pregnant. But with the timing - I ended up having the baby before I got the tooth pulled. And then I just never went back.
In the past I’ve had lapses between going and have had a lot of work done on my teeth (they’ve been bad since I was little).

Anyways now I know the teeth are super weak - I have that one that needs pulling which is finally starting to hurt. And then I broke off a molar when I got hit in the face playing sports and I have a front one that had a small piece broken off.

I also know I have build up.

I think my biggest fear is being shamed. And feeling judged. She has never lectured me before however I’ve never had them this bad before.

How do you all get over the fear?
 
J

jatay1985

Member
Joined
Aug 2, 2018
Messages
97
I don’t think you ever get over the fear initially. I think I felt better walking in there, letting them know my fears and then found out they were really understanding. I have REALLY bad build up and hadn’t seen a dentist in 20 years at least. They didn’t judge AT ALL. I’ve gotten so much more comfortable with going now that it almost seems as if I didn’t have a fear at all. It really helps when the staff is friendly.
 
krlovesherkids777

krlovesherkids777

Super Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 26, 2017
Messages
3,036
Location
Sioux Falls, SD
Jlb9

Welcome to DFC.. You are definitely in good company and it is good you are thinking about going even, its a step to get to that place of "I think I have to go, whether physical pain leads us there or not" is huge. and then writing here. you are taking closer steps and that what you can do, one step at a time.

I think my biggest fear is being shamed. And feeling judged. She has never lectured me before however I’ve never had them this bad before.

Shame is so huge and overwhelming at times, and when unspoken can feel so big .. When we talk about it and open up the those areas we find we are not at all alone in this and so many others could say "Me too" but it feels awful.. I totally know from experience.. my dentist tells me "I'm my own worst judge" which.. is very true much of the time. They are here to help us and it sounds like you have someone who has not judged in the past and seems pretty nice to work with. I'm imagining if you haven't yet,, even ifyou told her. "I'm SO embarrassed, and this is what keeps me from wanting to go".. she would probably be very reassuring and you would get more trust in her.

Its not easy to talk about these things.. for sure but its always been worth it. and the moment anyone responds and it wouldn't sit right with you, or they would be mean or rude about it.. time to find someone who wouldn't be . I think it sounds you have a really nice one though if you've never felt judged before.. STill very courageous to walk into that situation or have this conversation.

But taking care of yourself and knowing you are worth caring for.. it is a huge move and one you will be happy with. Not always easy but worth it!
 
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