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Freaking Out

J

jf2019

Junior member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
7
Location
USA
I have my first dental appointment in about an hour and it’s been almost 20 years since my last appointment. (Horrible and embarrassing to say the least)

I’m forcing myself to go because I have a small amount of pus at the gum line and I know after years of neglect, I’m in trouble.

I am absolutely freaking out (!!) about going and what they’re going to find once I get there. I’m terrified that they’ll have to pull teeth since my husband told me he’d no longer kiss me if I have major dental issues from not going for so long.

The reasons I haven’t been are primarily due to no insurance, fear, and INTENSE anxiety. He is lucky enough not to have anxiety and my life is constantly impacted by it...he just doesn’t get it.

I’m so scared and so close to calling and cancelling the appointment. I know I shouldn’t and that I need to force myself to go, but this is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to make myself do.

I guess I’m just posting because your posts helped me to make the appointment in the first place and I just need a little virtual hand-holding to get through this nightmare!
 
letsconnect

letsconnect

Administrator
Staff member
Joined
Jan 1, 2005
Messages
4,983
Well done for making the appointment jf2019 :)! We always say that you should treat the first appointment as a get-to-know-you meeting, where you get the chance to interview your prospective dentist and see if they pass the job interview. It's up to you whether you want to hire them or not. I hope that whoever you are going to meet is kind and caring and what you were hoping for!

Sending you lots of positive vibes :grouphug: - best of luck!!!
 
J

jf2019

Junior member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
7
Location
USA
I have tears in my eyes from your kindness, letsconnect! Thank you so much. ❤ I needed to hear that I don’t have to go through with a dentist if it’s not a good match. It was a good reminder!
 
krlovesherkids777

krlovesherkids777

Well-known member
Forum Buddy
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Jul 26, 2017
Messages
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Minneapolis, MN
jf2019,

Sending you lots of positive vibes too! I agree with Letsconnect , its up to you if you want them to do anything. You are very courageous to go, I know it feels like you have to with all going on and you're in a corner , but you are doing it! I really hope it is a kind and good office. You are in control. I hope you will have a peace there! Let us know how it goes! This is a huge step, give your self lots of credit for making it!
 
BoxerMom

BoxerMom

Member
Joined
Jun 23, 2019
Messages
78
Location
Us
You may find that things aren’t as bad as you’re expecting. And even if they are, you can do the treatment in steps/stages. You don’t need to do everything all at one time. It’s overwhelming enough dealing with anxiety so I’m sure your mind is racing with all kinds of scary things. My husband was also unaware of how bad my dental phobia was until I let him see what happens when I panic. You’ve made the appointment. That’s great!! And you were braver than me because my husband had to make that phone call for me. Please try to go and just see if you can talk to them about your issues. Best of luck!
 
T

thisisme

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2012
Messages
128
Jf2019, I just went back after a 16 year absence. You are not alone, and it does get easier.

That is so great that you made the appointment. That was one of the hardest parts. You are already a rockstar for scheduling it. You got this.

I’m thinking your appointment is mostly over now. I hope you report back and let us know how they went.
 
J

jf2019

Junior member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
7
Location
USA
jf2019,

Sending you lots of positive vibes too! I agree with Letsconnect , its up to you if you want them to do anything. You are very courageous to go, I know it feels like you have to with all going on and you're in a corner , but you are doing it! I really hope it is a kind and good office. You are in control. I hope you will have a peace there! Let us know how it goes! This is a huge step, give your self lots of credit for making it!
Thank you so much, krlovesherkids777! I’m overwhelmed by the amazing supportive comments from everyone and truly touched that strangers online cared enough to give me support and ease my nerves!
 
J

jf2019

Junior member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
7
Location
USA
Jf2019, I just went back after a 16 year absence. You are not alone, and it does get easier.

That is so great that you made the appointment. That was one of the hardest parts. You are already a rockstar for scheduling it. You got this.

I’m thinking your appointment is mostly over now. I hope you report back and let us know how they went.
Thank you so so much, thisisme! Now that it’s all over, I feel like I climbed a mountain and I feel so powerful!!

The staff at the office (minus the billing lady who had an attitude as soon as I asked about payment options) couldn’t have been nicer! My dental assistant was INCREDIBLE and I hugged her for being exactly what I needed! She calmed me down so much and was just the sweetest, kindest dental professional I’ve ever met! The hygienist was great too! She had a “You can do this!” attitude and I felt like she had my back. The doctor was great too...a little rougher than I expected but his chair side manner was fantastic!

I was floored about my diagnosis! First the good news: no cavities (how?!?!), no root canals, no crowns, no extractions! (Well, I should have my wisdom teeth out, but that’s for the future me to worry about haha)

Bad-ish News: I have an abscess, but not a super bad or critical one thankfully. Also, I have gum disease, but it could’ve been SO MUCH WORSE!!

I have two appointments in November for a root planing and scaling and to assess my gum disease. I had an ultrasonic cleaning, ridiculously bad tartar removal and I finally got my stupid permanent retainer out! I feel like I have a new (although a little sore) set of teeth and I’m smiling wider than I have in 20 years! I have a treatment plan and I’m gonna stick to it!
 
J

jf2019

Junior member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
7
Location
USA
You may find that things aren’t as bad as you’re expecting. And even if they are, you can do the treatment in steps/stages. You don’t need to do everything all at one time. It’s overwhelming enough dealing with anxiety so I’m sure your mind is racing with all kinds of scary things. My husband was also unaware of how bad my dental phobia was until I let him see what happens when I panic. You’ve made the appointment. That’s great!! And you were braver than me because my husband had to make that phone call for me. Please try to go and just see if you can talk to them about your issues. Best of luck!
I’m sorry that your husband doesn’t get your panic/anxiety either, but glad that you let him see it a little bit so he can try to empathize!

We’re all here for you! ❤

My appointment went 100000% better than what I imagined in my mind and I have a treatment plan for the next few months that I’m going to stick to! I feel like I have new teeth and I’m so grateful and proud that I could find the courage to go today! No matter how the appointment gets made, you still did it and should be proud of yourself for that!
 
BoxerMom

BoxerMom

Member
Joined
Jun 23, 2019
Messages
78
Location
Us
I’m sorry that your husband doesn’t get your panic/anxiety either, but glad that you let him see it a little bit so he can try to empathize!

We’re all here for you! ❤

My appointment went 100000% better than what I imagined in my mind and I have a treatment plan for the next few months that I’m going to stick to! I feel like I have new teeth and I’m so grateful and proud that I could find the courage to go today! No matter how the appointment gets made, you still did it and should be proud of yourself for that!
So happy for you!!:party::magicwand:
 
krlovesherkids777

krlovesherkids777

Well-known member
Forum Buddy
Joined
Jul 26, 2017
Messages
2,107
Location
Minneapolis, MN
Yes!! :welldone::perfect: So happy this all went so well!! The assistant and hygenist sound really lovely. and that is great the dentist has a great chairside manner :)...Sounds like good news all in all! Will you go back to the hygenist for the scaling?
 
T

thisisme

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2012
Messages
128
Look at you! You are incredible! No cavities, crowns or root canals! 👏 All those years of worries down the drain.

You have a plan! That is great. I am in the same boat with wisdom teeth. Future me can worry about it, haha. I like that. I had one removed last week because it was erupted with a bad cavity but the rest are staying for now.

You just conquered the world today and deserve to treat yourself. Congratulations!
 
J

jf2019

Junior member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
7
Location
USA
Yes!! :welldone::perfect: So happy this all went so well!! The assistant and hygenist sound really lovely. and that is great the dentist has a great chairside manner :)...Sounds like good news all in all! Will you go back to the hygenist for the scaling?
They were truly incredible people who understood me and did exactly what I needed them to do today. I’m going to send them a gift, I just don’t know what yet. I’m considering it good news, for sure!

I think the doctor will be measuring my gum pockets which are terrible, and the hygienist will do the scaling...at least I’ll be numb for that one!
 
J

jf2019

Junior member
Joined
Oct 9, 2019
Messages
7
Location
USA
Look at you! You are incredible! No cavities, crowns or root canals! 👏 All those years of worries down the drain.

You have a plan! That is great. I am in the same boat with wisdom teeth. Future me can worry about it, haha. I like that. I had one removed last week because it was erupted with a bad cavity but the rest are staying for now.

You just conquered the world today and deserve to treat yourself. Congratulations!
Thank you so much! This afternoon and evening were a little rough with all the bloody gums and pain, but I’ll treat myself tomorrow if I’m up to it! That’s a fantastic idea! And I think you’re super brave for getting that wisdom tooth out! Tooth extraction terrifies me!
 
letsconnect

letsconnect

Administrator
Staff member
Joined
Jan 1, 2005
Messages
4,983
Congratulations- you‘ve done so well :cloud9:! They sound like a really lovely and supportive team :). Hopefully your gums are feeling a little better today and you’ll get a chance to treat yourself!
 
T

thisisme

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 17, 2012
Messages
128
Thank you so much! This afternoon and evening were a little rough with all the bloody gums and pain, but I’ll treat myself tomorrow if I’m up to it! That’s a fantastic idea! And I think you’re super brave for getting that wisdom tooth out! Tooth extraction terrifies me!
You’d be surprised how much braver you get with each appointment. I hope you’re feeling better today! As a way to treat myself, every time I have an appointment, I buy something to decorate my spare bedroom. It’s got a clock and a pillow now. 🙂 I buy it online too, so I don’t have to go anywhere after an appointment. Haha.
 
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