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Gingivitis and crooked teeth..scared of the dentist



Sep 19, 2022
Hi I don't know if this is the right forum if not let me know

I'm 31 years old and just got dental insurance. I try not to think about my teeth because all my life I've been poor and can never get anything done. My insurance kicks in October 1 and I'm going to make an appointment and I'm terrified!

I haven't been to a dentist in 5 years. The last time I went in was for an abcess from a wisdom tooth. I got carecredit to get the wisdom tooth and the molar in front of it removed. I was told I needed braces as my bottom teeth overlap. They have always caused me gum issues. My parents never got me braces so here I am with crooked teeth and gingivitis.

My gingivitis is bothering me lately. I brush twice a day and use mouth wash and yeah I try remembering to floss but I do skip it a lot. The gums around two bottom teeth are swollen and bleed everytime I floss. It's driving me crazy! I just want them to heal. I dread hearing the lecture I know the dentist will give me. Every dentist I've gone to has been very rude to me and act like I enjoy having crooked teeth and gingivitis! My dental anxiety is so bad it's why I keep holding off on seeing one. I know now I have no other choice because this gingivitis won't heal. I cry thinking about how mean the dentist will be and I'm so scared ill have cavities or need a root canal that I can't afford. I don't want to pull any teeth but I'm worried I won't afford any root canals and will have no other choice...I'm really worried about one of my bottom teeth because the gum is lighter there and the swelling won't go away. I need reassurance or idk to knock me out so I don't have to listen to the dentist lecture me lol.
Hey there Honeybee! (Love the name by the way.)

Welcome to the forum! This is a huge step in the process of healing and getting yourself the treatment you need, reaching out to a forum and seeking support, so be proud of yourself!

I’m going to be real with you: before I went to the dentist this past March, I hadn‘t been in ten years. So you know, it happens for whatever reason. The thing is, and this is really hard to learn but it’s something I’ve been repeating to myself, that not knowing doesn’t do you any good. As in, not knowing what’s up with your teeth just makes you more stressed out and more scared and more unsure. Because you don’t know what’s happening. I haven’t had a full exam yet and won’t be until October (when I get extractions done, my dentist will also do a full exam and take x-rays. I’ll be knocked out so no gag reflex to worry about LOL); lemme tell you though, I’ve been going nuts over not knowing what’s going on in my mouth. I only know the very basics and nothing else, and it’s so scary! Like what if I need more extractions? What if I have more issues that I didn’t think I had? What if all my teeth are going to fall out? AH.

This is all to say that going is going to be a lot better for you than not. Of course, that’s with the right dentist. Listen to me: no dentist should shame you about your mouth or teeth. None at all. If you make an appointment with a dentist and work your way to getting there and getting an exam and they’re negative and rude, get up and leave. Because you can do that. Tell them where to take a hike, as my mother would say. You are the client, and they should never treat anyone that way when they don’t know their circumstances (or even when they do.)

The thing about seeing the dentist will be that you‘ll know what you’re dealing with and know what the treatment plan you need is. There won’t be any question marks or wondering how you can magically heal yourself (I’ve tried! It doesn’t work sadly LOL) You’ll have the answer, and it’s the only way you can start that healing process. You can do this! We’re here to support you on this forum, and there’s plenty of resources and success stories.
@APhobicQueen thank you so much for the words of encouragement! I'm glad there are others with similar fears. I know you're right and I'm going to keep that in mind when I go to the dentist 😀

I'm wishing you the best! Good luck I hope everything is easy for you
@honeybee91 Thank you! I hope everything goes well for you too, whatever ends up happening :)

And yes, believe me you’re not alone! The sheer amount of users here just proves it. Keep us updated on how things go! :grouphug:
@honeybee91 The dentist shouldn't be rude to you, it's unacceptable. I had one do that once, and what I did was switched offices and never went there again. At that time I hadn't been to a dentist close to 20 years and it was an emergency visit, and they suggested another appointment and I didn't do it. What I did then, that you may be able to do too, was find a dentist whose website said they welcomed people who had not been in for a long time. A lot of dentists are fine with this, and mention it on their websites.

When it comes to the financial issue, another thing I have learned is that a lot of dentists will offer payment plans if you ask.

I hope this is useful and good luck with everything!