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Handbags and coats...

Anna

Anna

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This is a really weird one, but I want to know if anyone has had the same problem as me, and if so I want them to know they are not alone!!

I am pretty much over my dental anxiety now, but when I was at my worst, one of the things that really got me in a tizzy before an appointment was wondering what I would do with my handbag and coat when I got into the surgery. No, this is not a wind up, and I used to get into a real state about it, adding to the overall feeling of panic and anxiety. I used to plan ages ahead what sort of bag i would take with me, and wether or not it would stand upright on the floor, or get in the way etc. Sometimes I used to think a small purse type bag which I could keep with me on the chair would be better. Should I just hand it to the dentist or find somewhere to put it. Asking the dentist what i should do with it was totally out of the question!

The coat or jacket was another problem. Most times I would try to do without a coat, or wear something light that I could keep on. Again, handing it to the dentist or trying to find somewhere to hang it was an horrific thought.

Now, I know the layout of my regular dentist's surgery, and immediately go in and put my coat and bag on the empty chair in the corner, and then I can relax. If he ever moved it I would probably freak!

Does anyone else relate to this or am I barking mad? I would be very interested in reations from our resident dentists to hear if they have ever recognised this "odd" trait in their patients, and what they would do with patients who appeared not to know what to do with their coats and bags.
 
letsconnect

letsconnect

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You're bonkers :D;)!

Actually, I was thinking the same thing myself before my last appointment, I don't even know why, because it had never been an issue before, but I simply *couldn't* remember where I usually put the coat and bag (of course, what happens is that they tell you, therefore there's no need to remember where to put them)! Then again, the same thing happens to me whenever I get a haircut... (for more info on bad hair days, see here: [out-of-date link removed] :p)

I can't say the handbags and coats issue was a proper fear for me, but it did have me perplexed...
 
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vicki

vicki

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Hi Anna :D

Yes I can relate to it, so if you're barking mad, then so am I! :D.

I've had the coat and bag problem for years - even at the opticians! :rolleyes:. I think part of it may be to do with "What if I put it in the wrong place and it gets in the way?" or "If I put it on the floor, will they trip over it?"

Of course it isn't an issue when you're younger because your one of your parents usually goes with you so they can hold your stuff - the same if you have a friend who stays in the waiting room. But what if you go on your own? :confused:

Up until I got a new dentist about 18 months ago, it used to be a real problem for me (as well as all the dental phobia/panic/anxiety - actually I'm surprised I have the time and energy to worry about this as well! :p). In the end, I used to opt for wearing trousers with pockets so I had somewhere to put the essentials (i.e. keys, mobile phone and money), so I didn't have the handbag worry.

It's a different story now though - the dentist I currently see has a chair against the wall at the side of "the chair" - so it's not a problem any more :thumbsup: (although I'd probably freak as well if he ever moved it :scared:).

Note to dentists reading this: always have a spare chair for us girlies to put our coats, bags, shopping and other junk on! :p ;)
 
Gordon

Gordon

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1) I always have a spare chair in the surgery, it's handy for girlie accessories but usually used by the "support" person
2) This is part of the dental assistant's duties anyway, welcoming the patient in, assisting with removing the coat, hat etc and finding a safe place to put it.
 
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freakout

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Hi...I had the same dilemma. I used to take a small purse that I could set on my lap, but felt uncomfortable. I used to leave my coat in the car. One very cold day they showed me a hook for the coat, but I still held the purse. Then I went to see an oral surgeon for a consult. The assistant was very nice and explained she would hang my coat and purse up on the back of the door. Well ever since then when I go to the my dentist I hang my purse up under my coat. I will probably worry what to do with the purse when the weather warms up, however. :(
 
letsconnect

letsconnect

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Interesting discussion :D! Pars, where do you put your sparan ;)?
 
Anna

Anna

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Hooray!  Im so glad I'm not the only one :jump:  I think it is all to do with every little thing becoming an issue when you are already in a state of anxiety. Maybe it actually  helps to focus on such things... I don't know.

Now for my next peculiarity, ;) Anyone relate to this one????

As well as my mouth getting dry with anxiety, my lips also crack up too, and I never used to be sure whether or not to use vaseline or lip salve before going into the dentist. I would smother my lips in it before I left home but then frantically rub it off in a state of indecision while in the waiting room in case the dentist got covered in it! One day when my dentist was fiddling around trying to get the crown right on my implant, the corner of my mouth became sore where his surgical gloves were rubbing on it. He offered me vaseline, and I thought yessss, it's ok to use it  :jump: Another demon out of the window  ;)

Now, I merrily sit there with my lipsalve applying it at every available oppportunity, and my dentist laughs at me (in a nice way) because he thinks I'm barking mad, but do I care? Nah....

He was totally oblivious to me getting worked up about such silly little things. I wonder how many dentists would even consider such things would worry their patients? But when you are in a state of total panic everything gets out of proportion, and becomes a big deal.

Thanks Gordon for your comments. You have obviously trained your assistant well! :)
 
vicki

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I used to put vaseline or colourless lip gloss on because my lips get really dry as well, but it usually ends up on my dentists gloves - I can't stand the embarrassment, both of the noise it makes when his hands stick to my lip (I know it sounds ridiculous!  :redface: :p) and also when he reaches for a tissue to wipe it off his hands :redface: So I don't bother now - I just put up with dry lips and slather on the vaseline afterwards!

I'm coming back as a man in the next life - I'm sure they don't have to worry about such things as handbags, coats and vaseline at the dentists! :p

Maybe we should start a "What's your peculiarity?" thread? ;) Another of mine is that I worry about who should speak (i.e. say hello) first! I usually go in and say nothing because a) I'm too scared and b) I don't want to speak at the same time as him and I would prefer it if he made the first move (again this sounds ridiculous! :p) but I usually end up standing there looking a right idiot because he says nothing as well (probably because he's waiting for me to say hi first! :rolleyes:) Anyone else have that worry?
 
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freakout

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Actually, that is one thing I don't have to worry about, because he always comes into the room holding my chart saying "Hi, how are you?" I usually reply "OK" no matter how I am doing and freeze right up lol. He usually tries to get me to talk more , be my standard answer is "OK" I am really in trouble if he asks anything that I can't reply OK to. lol
 
vicki

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Well my entire vocabulary consists of 5 words when I'm at the dentists - "Hi, Bye, Yes, No and Errr" - So I'm stuffed if he asks anything that can't be answered with one of those :redface: I usually just go errrr... errrr... errrrr... He usually gives up then and asks a question that can be answered yes or no - so it is possible to train your dentist!
 
Anna

Anna

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I once had an emergency extraction at Eastman dental hospital in London, and the dentist, who had not met me before had no idea I was petrified :scared::scared:. (I'm actually quite a good actress :p) He was quite nice and was explaining the procedure, and asking me questions, but I couldn't answer! All of a sudden he said "well speak to me then", and I blurted out, " it's difficult to speak when you are paralysed with fear!!" At which point he burst out laughing, ( I had said it in a funny way :D), and that did make me feel slightly less anxious. I can always deal with a situation better with humour, but that's just me, it doesn't suit everybody. Which is another reason my lovely dentist thinks I'm barking mad :hic: He is struggling to get to grips with my weird sense of humour :D
 
kitkat

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I was wondering about that handbag thing the other day as I'm going to start attending on my own soon (in a few months) when I'm old enough, it's kinda nice to have someone in the waiting room hold on to your things for you though. What about under "the chair" either behind it or under the foot of the chair so noone trips on it? Might work.
The speech thing normally stumps me too...if I'm asked a question that can't be answered with yes, no, ok...I always have a standard fall back that can immediately drop the question..."I don't know" seems to get the job done. :)
While we are on the subject of "peculiarities" I've got two for ya lol.
This sounds really ridiculous but when I get extremely nervous and try to stop shaking another part of me starts going like say I get my legs to go still, my arms start going, and once I get my arms still my teeth start chattering lol So when my mouth is open and I'm holding the rest of my body still, my lips start quivering lol And seriously One of my really big fears is that I'm not going to be able to keep my lips still :p Although normally the harder I try to suppress it the more anxious I get and it only becomes more noticeable. It's a viscious cycle.

Also does anyone else worry about where to look in treatment or is this just me?...I always feel so awkward no matter what direction I look in, I used to just close my eyes but I no longer see that as an option as I've gotten jumpier to unexpected sensations and like to see what's coming. I usually just force myself to try to keep eye contact with the dentist now as it seems to calm me some, even though I have to "force" myself to look in that direction?...Ironic I know. :rolleyes:
 
Anna

Anna

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Yep, I get the quivering lip too! I hate it because I want to appear "normal" and I don't want anything to give the game away :redface:

I'm getting better with the "where to look" thing, but that use to worry me a lot as well :D

This thread is great, and so reassuring :jump:. I'm so glad I'm not the only mad person who has all these petty worries.

C'mon, lets hear some more ;)
 
kitkat

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Anna said:
Yep, I get the quivering lip too!  I hate it because I want to appear "normal" and I don't want anything to give the game away :redface:
Yep! My reasoning exactly, I couldn't have said it better myself ! :D lol. I never realized I did it up until this past year, my new dentist is the type where she "says what she sees" almost like thinking out loud...and she points it out to me each time we are about to start work, so in other words, I blew my cover lol. I used to think I had this acting thing down but maybe they just weren't telling me :confused: lol. I just hope she is overly perceptive lol. But in someways that worries me too but I figure oh well the jig is up anyway and she already knows giving me less reason to hold back next time :D
 
letsconnect

letsconnect

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I always worry about which radio programme is going to be on. The problem is that for my favourite appointment times (3 or 4 pm), there's sports programmes on, so I ended up switching to 2pm appointments. Just to make sure I'm in for a music programme... Does anyone else have the radio programme problem :confused:

Regarding the lip balm thing, no, I've never have a problem with that, I always apply something or other (Blistex the last time, to be exact :D) so that I won't feel sore. The talking thing isn't a problem either, I usually launch into some sort of job interview... which must strike him as a bit peculiar, because he gives me a big spiel about how he still enjoys his job each time I see him :p. I have a suspicion that it's not a common question....
 
kitkat

kitkat

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letsconnect said:
I always worry about which radio programme is going to be on. Does anyone else have the radio programme problem  :confused:
Yep! I too make a point of trying to get in on the music hours! The radio is a very important component to me as music makes a good focal point in treatment, especially during drilling it helps me space out! lol For some reason last time I had a filling they didn't have the radio on and it seems to make the tools sound twice as loud; especially when you are hearing it out in the waiting room beforehand...That always irks me.

Also does anyone else worry about the slight possibility that the power might go out in the middle of treatment? This might just be me cause living in Florida we get lots of Hurricanes and I had an appt once the day after a huge powerouttage and they called that morning to tell me they got powerback and I could go in for the procedure anyway although I was secretly hoping they were still out :thumbsup:.

The other thing that irks me is a crowded waiting room! I hate trying to act natural in front of a group of people, and then people start staring at each other for some sort of reaction and once they realize they are staring at each other they smile for no reason, look away, and then go right back to staring and I always feel the need to fidget and when there is a lot of people around I have to try to suppress it lol.
 
letsconnect

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kitkat said:
Yep! I too make a point of trying to get in on the music hours! The radio is a very important component to me as music makes a good focal point in treatment
Glad to hear I'm not the only one :D!
 
vicki

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kitkat said:
While we are on the subject of "peculiarities" I've got two for ya lol.  
This sounds really ridiculous but when I get extremely nervous and try to stop shaking another part of me starts going like say I get my legs to go still, my arms start going, and once I get my arms still my teeth start chattering lol So when my mouth is open and I'm holding the rest of my body still, my lips start quivering lol And seriously One of my really big fears is that I'm not going to be able to keep my lips still  :p
Tell me about it! :rolleyes: I shake so much and get that paranoid about it that I fold myself up like a piece of human origami when I'm in the chair to try and stop the shaking! :redface: In fact I probably lay in one of the most uncomfortable positions possible - I'm certainly not one of those people that you see in the ad's who lay in the dentist's chair like they're on a sun lounger!

My teeth chatter as well so I usually put my tongue between my teeth when my mouth is closed which at least stops the noise a bit. Only trouble is when he tells me to open my mouth and then either my teeth start chattering or my lips start quivering big time and it doesn't matter what I try - they just keep on quiverin' Arrrrgghhhhh....!!!! At least my dentist hasn't said anything about it (yet!).

kitkat said:
Also does anyone else worry about where to look in treatment or is this just me?...
Yep! :redface: The first two dentists I saw (before the one I see now), used to sit behind me and a little way back from the chair (maybe they just had long arms! :p) so once the chair was flat, all I could see was the ceiling so I usually tried to keep my eyes open unless I had any flashbacks of previous bad incidents, in which case I kept them shut.

The guy I see now sits in the same place but seems to sit closer, hunches over a bit and peers right in :sick: so if I keep my eyes open, instead of the ceiling, all I can see are a pair of upside-down eyes staring me and it really freaks me out! :scared:

OK, I have another one: At my last appointment, I had my first encounter with the completely geeky safety glasses. Although I've had various treatments in the past, I've never been made to wear them - probably 'cause I usually wear glasses but on this occasion I was wearing my contact lenses. Anyway, there was I, laid there completely terrified and once all the fiddling and poking had finished, I opened my eyes to discover that not only was I burning hot but I'd also managed to completely steam the specs up and I couldn't see a thing! :redface: :redface: :redface: Serious embarrassment - I could have died a thousand deaths! Now I'm living in fear that the same thing will happen the next time :o. I think I might wear sunglasses next time :( Anyone experienced this before?
 
letsconnect

letsconnect

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vicki said:
Yep! :redface: The first two dentists I saw (before the one I see now), used to sit behind me and a little way back from the chair (maybe they just had long arms! :p) so once the chair was flat, all I could see was the ceiling so I usually tried to keep my eyes open unless I had any flashbacks of previous bad incidents, in which case I kept them shut.
I always keep them shut except when there's a "change of instruments" or a break... I don't get flashbacks anymore, but in the beginning I did get them whenever I opened my eyes, so now I find it more relaxing with eyes closes (off into the land of nod ;)).


OK, I have another one: At my last appointment, I had my first encounter with the completely geeky safety glasses. Although I've had various treatments in the past, I've never been made to wear them - probably 'cause I usually wear glasses but on this occasion I was wearing my contact lenses. Anyway, there was I, laid there completely terrified and once all the fiddling and poking had finished, I opened my eyes to discover that not only was I burning hot but I'd also managed to completely steam the specs up and I couldn't see a thing! :redface: :redface: :redface: Serious embarrassment - I could have died a thousand deaths! Now I'm living in fear that the same thing will happen the next time :o. I think I might wear sunglasses next time :( Anyone experienced this before?
I used to refuse the safety glasses point blank - I was really worried that I might start crying and my dentist wouldn't be able to notice because of those glasses! Now I don't mind them anymore. In the summer, when I wear sunglasses anyway, he usually just asks me to put them on instead of the safety goggles.
 
vicki

vicki

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letsconnect said:
I used to refuse the safety glasses point blank - I was really worried that I might start crying and my dentist wouldn't be able to notice because of those glasses! Now I don't mind them anymore. In the summer, when I wear sunglasses anyway, he usually just asks me to put them on instead of the safety goggles.
Oh well, in that case I shall wear my contact lenses and sunglasses at every appointment from now on! (even in winter or at night :D :p)
 
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