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Haven't been to dentist for 10 years I'm now 21

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Bunbun

Junior member
Joined
Apr 1, 2017
Messages
15
Basically
I had a LOT of work done as a child extractions fillings etc.

I woke up in the middle of one of the procedures and I get flashbacks of what i saw even though I had IV and gas sedation they were worried I would go into cardiac distress my heart rate was that high.

I can't even think about the dentist without getting teary ?

One of my teeth at the back is decaying and feels odd. I know I NEED to go to the dentist but I physically can't I'm paralysed with fear and embarrassment and worry of the cost.

Any advice for a hopeless case like myself?
 
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Paranoidpatient

Member
Joined
Jan 25, 2017
Messages
25
:welcome: I was in a similar situation about 5 months ago. I am 25 years old and have not been to the dentist in over 12 years due to a negative childhood experience, I promised myself I would stay away from dentists at all costs. About a year ago I started to get pain in one of my back teeth, that pain struck me with more fear than you could imagine. Crying like a baby at night, focusing on my teeth more than I should (I would say being obsessed) and becoming depressed.

After many talks with mother and emotional support from her, I went online and did a search for a dentist and found one that looked professional and trustworthy. I will admit my mom had to make the appointment for me...at 25 how embarrassing...but she told them my story and they listened. Then came my appointment, the sleepless nights and worrying the days before it. I convinced myself that if you named a dental issue I had it!

I walked into the office terrified and shaking...but everyone in the office greeted me with a smile and were super friendly. I sat in the dreaded chair and the assistants were funny and distracted me while I got x rays. Then I got to meet the dentist, who was down to earth and completely normal, not the scary person I let my mind create over the years. The x rays showed I had 3 cavities which shocked me...2 require a filling and one a root canal I thought it was going to be way more, need one wisdom tooth pulled and a good cleaning.

I made a huge step, though admittedly I am still very nervous and I have procrastinated with the work I need done but I think that is human nature when something makes you nervous. You have made a huge step in posting here, reading others posts and success stories is very helpful and continues to help me. I hope this helps and if you have questions or would like to vent please feel free to!
:hug5:
 
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Bunbun

Junior member
Joined
Apr 1, 2017
Messages
15
:welcome: I was in a similar situation about 5 months ago. I am 25 years old and have not been to the dentist in over 12 years due to a negative childhood experience, I promised myself I would stay away from dentists at all costs. About a year ago I started to get pain in one of my back teeth, that pain struck me with more fear than you could imagine. Crying like a baby at night, focusing on my teeth more than I should (I would say being obsessed) and becoming depressed.

After many talks with mother and emotional support from her, I went online and did a search for a dentist and found one that looked professional and trustworthy. I will admit my mom had to make the appointment for me...at 25 how embarrassing...but she told them my story and they listened. Then came my appointment, the sleepless nights and worrying the days before it. I convinced myself that if you named a dental issue I had it!

I walked into the office terrified and shaking...but everyone in the office greeted me with a smile and were super friendly. I sat in the dreaded chair and the assistants were funny and distracted me while I got x rays. Then I got to meet the dentist, who was down to earth and completely normal, not the scary person I let my mind create over the years. The x rays showed I had 3 cavities which shocked me...2 require a filling and one a root canal I thought it was going to be way more, need one wisdom tooth pulled and a good cleaning.

I made a huge step, though admittedly I am still very nervous and I have procrastinated with the work I need done but I think that is human nature when something makes you nervous. You have made a huge step in posting here, reading others posts and success stories is very helpful and continues to help me. I hope this helps and if you have questions or would like to vent please feel free to!
:hug5:
Thank you so much for your reply

My mum has no idea I am so afraid she isn't exactly the supportive type :(

I feel embarrassed to tell my parents or my friends about this fear as they all have perfect teeth apart from me.

I also worry about money. The place I.went to as a kid I was referred to for nervous patients they told me if you feel pain tell us and we will stop I said it hurt and they Ignored me. I hate that feeling of being powerless.

How is your treatment going?
 
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Paranoidpatient

Member
Joined
Jan 25, 2017
Messages
25
For me telling people I have a fear or the dentist was pretty hard, was afraid I would be laughed at or made fun of. Also the lectures of "well you should take care of your teeth better" was my worry but my parents understood but also pushed me to go. This forum is pretty great for support, reading success stories and seeing that you are definitely not alone.

I do not have the money to get everything done at once, I know that teeth and overall health are important but there are other bills and payments that are more urgent. I am basically spacing it out and saving what money I can, I have the benefit? For the lack of a better term...of catching all but one cavity early and are not urgent but need done. My dentist also makes payment plans for non emergency appointments which is nice. One thing I have noticed on my journey is that most of my biggest worries are not that big at all and it's really nerves.

I am happy I found a dentist I can trust, you might think I am silly but I have been slowly introduced to it. A meet and greet the first appointment, exam and x rays the second. Next appointment is to have a tooth tested to see if it's alive...which I am nervous as can be about :o
 
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Thisishard

Member
Joined
Jan 4, 2015
Messages
42
Hello,

Congradulations on taking the first step. Just doing some research and asking for support/help can be a huge step. It is, in fact, an essential step. So kudos to you. I went 33 years without seeing a dentist. 33 years. I finally decided to make a change. Instead of feeling dread at just talking about the dentist, I wanted to be able to take pride in beating this anxiety. I did research, on the dentists in the area, and after several false starts finally found a great team. I made the appointment for a first meet and greet appointment, then proceeded to freak out. Having suffered from anxiety my whole life, I have learned a few tricks over the years. Acclimating yourself to the situation that causes the feelings, seems to work for me. So I simply dropped by the dentist office once a day for two weeks. Did not stay long or take up much of their time. Just stopped by. To get used to the feeling of going through the door and talking to someone. I was still a mess, on the day of the appointment, but I actually made it in the door and sat down with them. On the day of the actual appointment/ inspection, they gave me one halcyon (sp) to take the edge off. Worked like a champ. I am a big guy who works out daily, and that one tiny blue pill did not put me out. It just took the edge off.

Today i go to the dentist 3-4 times a year for cleaning and inspections. I still get a little jumpy for a few days ahead. Although the truth be told, I look forward to walking out of the office afterwards. My teeth feel great and I have a renewed sense of hope/joy that anxiety can be beaten. Takes work. Never over. But it is doable.

Tom
 
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Ellieclarke1989

Member
Joined
Jan 27, 2017
Messages
44
No such thing as a hopeless case. We can all be helped no matter what. I understand your fears and I really do hope that you are able to find a good dentist x
 
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Emiltig

Junior member
Joined
Apr 5, 2017
Messages
15
Location
Upstate New York
Oh boy, can I relate to this posting. My last cleaning was when I was 18, and I'm now 33. I had a few negative experiences as a child as well and decided I wasn't going back. The whole time though, I was dealing with gum recession, majorly in the lower bottom teeth. Just two of the middle ones were the worst. I was terrified of having to show someone what was happening. I've dealt with this on my own and never told a soul until recently, about two weeks ago, my close friend. I felt like nobody else was having these issues, so what a complete eye opener it was to find this site! I'm thankful to be able to share with others and read their experiences. It's helping me with my own. I decided I just couldn't live with these fears, embarrassment and anxiety anymore. I had to deal with it, because it was running my life. Low self esteem, low self-worth, anger, bouts of depression, it wasn't getting better.

I made it to my appointment Monday, and found out, even with my gum recession that I wasn't a hopeless case like I had thought as well. I have cavities, a number of them. Also, I have a misaligned jaw and bite that my first orthodontist never fixed. I'm looking at quite a road ahead and most likely costly, but I found the right dentist to take the journey with and I'm really glad I made that call to make the appointment. You can do it!

It's the first step forward. I wish you good luck!
 
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