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Haven't been to the dentist for years

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Thorpe55

Junior member
Joined
Feb 14, 2020
Messages
3
Location
Stafford
Hello,
I haven't been to a dentist for years I'm so scared to go. I'm scared that once I get there the dentist won't be able to help or I will be left with missing teeth for the rest of my life, I'm 27 years old and this is something that is Ruining my life I've lost all my confidence I try not to speak or smile when I'm out. Can anyone give me some advice please
 
Enarete

Enarete

Super Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Sep 18, 2017
Messages
2,519
Hi Thorpe55 :welcome:,

sorry to read about your situation, I can't even imagine how hard life must be if you don't feel confident enough to smile or speak freely. It sounds like you don't know where to begin and how to go about things yet and that's ok. Rest assured that no matter how bad things feel right now, there is hope. For most it is a journey that has many steps. We have a page about where to start which might give you a quick orientation and some idea about how you could go about things. This site is full of resources and lovely people that are here to provide guidance and support.
 
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thread

Member
Joined
Feb 8, 2020
Messages
21
Location
Australia
I can sympathize with not wanting to smile and speak, it is a terrible feeling and knock to your self esteem and I'm really sorry you are feeling like that. Even though it's scary and daunting even by researching online, finding this place and posting here you are taking some proactive action toward improving your situation.

I can't say if you'd be missing teeth or not but even if that would be the unfortunate case and current situation (you may well find it's not at all) you'd be a lot better off with a dentist on your side helping you along now then leaving it, going it alone and suffering worse later.

You are in control and you don't need to agree to do anything you are not happy to do. So even if the dentist said you did need a tooth removed and you are not ready for that yet, you are no worse off, only better for knowing.

I'm sure the dentist will be able to help you! I don't think there is much at all that they haven't seen or dealt with before.
 
Dr. Daniel

Dr. Daniel

Well-known member
Verified dentist
Joined
Nov 2, 2010
Messages
1,869
Location
The Hague , Holland
Hi,

A big part of the stress you are experiencing is because you have not been to the dentist for years and it is very unknown and frightening.
surely after the first appointment you will be more acquainted and feel less uncertainty and stress before the following appointment.
I'm scared that once I get there the dentist won't be able to help or I will be left with missing teeth for the rest of my life
in most cases, a dentist can provide at least an immidiate temporary solution for a missing tooth. If the dentist is experienced and has enough time, itshould be doable. You can ask the practice in advance whether they can give a long enough appointment for that.
or I will be left with missing teeth for the rest of my life
Some cases can be more challenging and then it is better to refer for a specialist. Unless there is a physical limitation, every problem is treatable.
 
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MissM250

Junior member
Joined
Feb 25, 2020
Messages
12
Location
Victoria
Hey! I'm glad you're here :)

I'm right here with you. I haven't been in over 23 years and have my first appointment April 23.

My best advice is to really research a lot into who is available in your area. I found an office that has literally made me feel like a HUMAN just over emails, for the first time ever. It's been a life changing day! ( I just made my first post today about it! Please feel free to check it out)

I really hope you can find comfort here, and a dentist that you'll love. I took the big step of finally talking to my husband about it today, and having someone else know the phobia and fear is really empowering.

Keep talking to us, we're listening!
 
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Thorpe55

Junior member
Joined
Feb 14, 2020
Messages
3
Location
Stafford
Thank you so much for your reply. May I ask how you went about emailing I have no idea what to put in a email to the dentist I'm to nervous to call them. Thanks
 
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MissM250

Junior member
Joined
Feb 25, 2020
Messages
12
Location
Victoria
Thank you so much for your reply. May I ask how you went about emailing I have no idea what to put in a email to the dentist I'm to nervous to call them. Thanks
Hey!

I told them everything. I told them why I hadn't been, and that I was nauseated even sending the email. I told them I had financial limitations, and that I'd cancelled many other appointments out of fear.

The girl who emailed back was so gentle, and understanding. Didn't ask me to call, sent me the intake forms early, and even checked my insurance for a counselling appointment (which was covered YAY!)

Just be open. Have the conversation with them that you think about when you have the "in a perfect world, a talk with the dental office would go like this" daydream (I know I had it a lot).

I hope this helps!
 
Enarete

Enarete

Super Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Sep 18, 2017
Messages
2,519
Thank you so much for your reply. May I ask how you went about emailing I have no idea what to put in a email to the dentist I'm to nervous to call them. Thanks
MissM250 already gave you an idea. You can also find some ideas about what to put in an email (or how to get in touch in general) here:
 
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