• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone who is has a severe fear of the dentist or dental treatment. Please note that this is NOT a general dental problems or health anxiety forum! You can find a list of them here.

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Having thoughts of harming myself



Well-known member
Nov 5, 2014
I have been having panic attacks all day about the gum inflammation and bone loss that I have and not knowing how much of it there is and hating the way my teeth and gums look and worrying about the health of them as well as struggling with autism and I have been having thoughts of harming myself. I have been too scared to eat and too scared about not eating and too scared about my next dentist appointment and scared if I dont go to it as well. Please can anyone help?. I tried contacting the mental health team but they didnt mention coming to see me even though I told them how unwell I am and they are only going to ask their manager about increasing the dose of my medication on Monday. They don't seem to understand how urgent it is and I have been in psychiatric hospitals for the same reasons before.
If you read my post on here you'll see I felt the same. I considered ending it and I have a 2 year old daughter. I was breaking down practically writing some of those posts just talking to myself with no replies. It got bad. No sleep, calling in sick to work, every 5 seconds thinking of my teeth to the point I couldn't switch off at all when trying to do anything else.

In the end the fear of what could happen if I didn't go outweighed the fear of going, and I thought that whatever issues I have can only be helped if I went. If I don't go they're just going to get worse. It doesn't stop them or make them go away. Sure I'd feel slightly better I avoided something I was scared of and had a phobia of since a kid, but feeling wouldn't last long and it wouldn't solve my issues now and future issues. It got to a point that I felt so anxious, stressed, and a complete mess over it that actually going to the dentist started to feel like the lesser of two evils. I couldn't deal with that long term, I had to go and get help, regardless of how bad things could be.

That's what helped me anyway, it's all I can really offer.
@Whyohwhy12 I have so much stress and anxiety wondering if I should see the dentist I saw last time or not because I'm not sure if he made the right diagnosis with mentioning the bone loss. Another dentist at another surgery said that I had bone loss in my gums near my back teeth five years ago. I saw two other dentists and two hygienists at the surgery I go to now and none of them mentioned any bone loss and they said there was only a bit of inflammation and then the dentist I saw mentioned that I have bone loss but didn't say how much there was or how much inflammation there was so that has also caused stress and anxiety. I am supposed to be having a deep cleaning with that dentist next week. I'm not sure whether to still have the deep cleaning with that dentist or wait and see if the next dentist I see mentions the bone loss and deep cleaning. I am wondering if inflammation in the gums can be genetic because my brothers gums also bleed. I have been using the interdental brushes and the water flosser and an electric toothbrush but it seems like no matter what I do, my gums still bleed. I think about my gums constantly and even though I haven't had problems with my teeth for years and only needed cleanings, I don't like how small my teeth are. I have only ever had three fillings and two extractions since I became an adult. I have no holes in my teeth, no loose teeth and no pain. I'm also not sure whether people can get bone loss in just seven months, I saw another dentist seven months ago who didn't mention the bone loss, or if it takes decades to get bone loss which is what the dentists on the forum said.