• Dental Phobia Support

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help me - dentist wouldnt stop when i asked and now i am soooo scared of going back!!!!!!!



Junior member
Jul 7, 2009
help me - dentist wouldnt stop when i asked and now i am soooo scared of going back!!!!!!!

i am new to this forum and this is my first post so hi everyone.
i need help desperatley, ive been near to tears all week, they just keep coming and nothing anyone says is helping.
i have had a fear of dentists since i was a child, a really bad fear where i only went when i have to. the last few years ive managed to not get rid of my fear but work around it and ive had a lot of work done, ive had two extractions awake and fillings and general stuff so my teeth are ok but its been an uphill struggle for me. the problem is i have a very small mouth with limited access for the dentist to work on and this has always been a problem but again its been worked around and i was starting to feel i was at last starting to manage the fear. ive been going to the same dentist for a couple of years and again i dont particuarly like it but i went. i went last week and saw the other lady dentist and i thought she was ok, we talked about a possible root canal and she explained to me that she would do a temp filling to see if it settled down as the decay had not reached the root. if it settled down then i was go back and have a normal filling and that would be that. i went back two weeks later and it had settled down and she said that a normal filling would be ok.
it all started off well, she did the injection and started to drill and i was totally comfortable then something else happened which i wasnt prepared for and she never explained to me and perhaps somebody else can explain. she put a clamp inside my mouth around the tooth and started to work again. i started to feel awful as i had the nurse and her all over me and i felt terrible, suffocated as if i was going to have a panic attack. i put my hand up to have a break and she refused to stop saying she would only be a minute and she had to carry on. i did try to endure but the panic had set in by now and i thought i was going to black out. i am ashamed to say that i struggled and panicked and went to get up through fear and she held me down and shouted at me various things and was quite brutal.
i told her i was going to pass out and she pushed me back in the chair. it was pretty terrible for me to go through that seeing as i trusted her but she never explained to me anything. i just thought it was a filling and never knew about that horrible clamp thing. All i wanted was some air to breathe and she could have carried on with no problem but it all turned out horrible. my mum was with me and they called her in to calm me down, pathetic really seeing as i am a grown woman with a little girl of my own who is seven. i know i have to go the dentist again and i wont be going back to her but i dont want to stop going but now the fear has returned and i need advice on how to overcome it. i am determined to get over this and carry on but how do i trust another dentist and how do i explain my fears so that they undestand.
when you tell a dentist to stop surely they should stop shouldnt they? im totally confused and i just need advice. i am not the sort of person who needs sedation as i have had teeth out and fillings but its just that i am very claustrophic and i need a dentist i can trust. please help me:confused:
Re: help me - dentist wouldnt stop when i asked and now i am soooo scared of going back!!!!!!!

How absolutely horrible. I really hope what of the people with more experience can provide practical help.

All I can say is that you NEVER have to go back to her. Is it a big practice, could you talk to someone else there and explain how badly you feel treated and say you don't want to see this dentist again. If you feel too traumatised to do this could someone do it for you?

Just a couple of thoughts anyway.
Re: help me - dentist wouldnt stop when i asked and now i am soooo scared of going back!!!!!!!

Hi Tinkerbell232:

I am sorry for what you have been subjected to during your visit. The whole thing was wrong on so many levels I do not know where to begin. :o

To begin, I would file a complaint with your state's dental board if you live in the USA or with NHS in the UK.

I can understand your fears and would not go back to this dentist. You were subjected to abuse and a severe lack of human decency. :mad:

You are not over reacting. This type of treatment must be stopped. You have rights as a patient, which most of were violated. Please do not let this pass by without action. This will also help you to bring closure to this episode and move through it.

I am a psychologist and an anxiety specialist. If you would like to chat or have me send you some techniques and tools, PM me.

Blessings. :)
Re: help me - dentist wouldnt stop when i asked and now i am soooo scared of going back!!!!!!!

As StressDoc says, you really need to complain about this. You have suffered an assult and malpractice with being subject to treatment without your consent.

This has to stop and you have to stop this dentist from torturing anyone else. You are not the 'bad person' here, you are the victim. You have rights as a patient and those rights have been violated.
Re: help me - dentist wouldnt stop when i asked and now i am soooo scared of going back!!!!!!!

Hug and support to you from me as well. :hug2: The way you were "treated" was inexcusable (to be polite) and I wish you all good luck in finding a dentist who is worth being seen by you both in time and msot of all trust.

Re: help me - dentist wouldnt stop when i asked and now i am soooo scared of going back!!!!!!!

I know how you feel my fear came from having a dentist who as a child had done a filling on me and when I screamed and said it hurt he told me not to be so silly and carried on needless to say i became mega phobic after that!! Anyway ive finally got my teeth sorted now thanks to an amazing dentist who has shown me that my treatment as a child was not normally or right i strongly believe its about having the right kind dentist and once you find one you know yr in safe hands and that you can get things done. Seriously i was convinced i would say stop and they would ignore me but during my very first procedure i held my hand up and he stopped immidiately from then on my faith was restored !!!
You can do this with the right dentist honest you can a dentist has a duty to stop when you say stop.
agree a signal usually a hand held up does it and discuss why yr so nervous my dentist was brilliant once he knew why i was so scared.
best of luck