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Horrible Anticipatory Anxiety

FearfulInMA

FearfulInMA

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Jun 14, 2012
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2,150
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Massachusetts, USA
well... i'm back after a hiatus. i hope you all aren't sick of me :shame:.

i'm wondering how any of you with severe anxiety leading up to your appts cope with this. i may be one of those weird people who is actually more anxious in the days leading up to an appt than i am (for the most part) when i am actually in the chair. don't get me wrong, i'm anything but anxiety-free in the chair, but it's nothing compared to the profoundly debilitating anxiety i feel in the days leading up to an appt.

i have an appt for a cleaning (i know, no biggie) on thursday and i've been a wreck since yesterday. the only way i can describe how i feel is to say that it's what it must feel like the second before you are about to jump out of a plane (i've never done this, but can only imagine). the problem is, i have this feeling from the moment i wake up until i'm finally able to get myself to sleep at night. i get headaches, feel like i can't breathe, and have horrible stomach issues. i can't focus at work (i have a rather technical job and, yesterday, my boss asked me if i wanted to do some data entry to just try to calm down), i don't want to eat anything b/c my stomach is such a mess, i have trouble sleeping. part of what makes it worse for me is that there is not anything in particular that i'm worried about. so i can't even tell myself that it's going to be ok b/c i'm not really worried about anything (except this time i'm worried that my appt may get cancelled b/c we are supposed to get snow and then i would have to go through all of this anxiety all over again). i've been going to the same dentist for 6 yrs and the hygienist there now has been there for a couple of years. i like them both and they are both very good at helping me to manage my anxiety while i'm there. i've thought about calling to see if they have any cancellations for today or tomorrow so that i don't have to prolong my anxiety, but then i worry that they will think that i really am crazy.

sorry to ramble on like this, but i'm just not sure what to do. have any of you successfully managed to cope with anxiety that seemingly has no cause? i've tried exercise to try to get some of the energy out (what friends suggested), but that only seemed to make things worse (giving me more energy)... i also know that, when the anxiety is at its worst, exercise is out of the question b/c it's so difficult to breathe. Others have suggested yoga/meditation, but there is no way i can quiet myself for that (even under the best of circumstances) any other thoughts?

i would be so grateful for any suggestions/support you can provide over the next couple of days.
 
Just want to say you're certainly not alone in feeling like this. I went to the dentist for the first time in years last week for an exam & xrays, was very nervous but was lucky that I rang up to register and got an appointment first thing the following day so that limited the time to lead up to it. This morning I've been back, only to discuss a plan, look at the xrays, etc. and was in a far worse state these past couple of days - not sure why as the dentist and other staff are so lovely and put me at ease as much as possible. Goodness knows what state I'll be in when I go back in a couple of weeks to start treatment ...o_O

One thing that helps me a bit is understanding that all those awful anxious, panicky feelings are 'just' physical symptoms of your body going into fight-or-flight mode (though you probably logically know you're not in any actual physical danger) and producing a tonne of adrenaline - for me it's feeling dizzy, sick, faint, tingling hands and feet, chest pains, shakiness, feeling of intense dread, etc. I just try to get my breathing under control - deep, slow breathes in and out, and tell myself that it will pass as the adrenaline gradually reduces. I also try to accept the anxiety as something that just happens and don't try to fight it happening but remember it won't do you any lasting harm, and so try not get get anxious about getting anxious!! So kind of almost make friends with the feelings and know they will pass and you will deal with them.
Sure others will have some more good practical suggestions. :)
 
Hi,

You really aren't a lone in feeling that way. I felt that way too leading up to the appointments I had. It also does help a lot when you like your dentist. I got my mind off my appointments by watching stuff I love like comedy or playing my keyboard. Hope you're able to calm down.
 
I get like that too! Even just reading your post made my heart beat faster and my fingers and chest tingle! Know that it is natural- it's adrenaline! I find that talking about it helps- because I can't get it off my mind so getting it off of my chest is good! Also, on YouTube there are a few binaural videos- some are called role plays, and I find they help me with some noise and sound triggers? It can be helpful to prepare yourself for the sounds of drills and general dentist noises before you go- and helping you control your nerves at the time! Also, listening to music and keeping on reassuring yourself! If you are very worried email your dentist and just say you are feeling nervous- they won't judge you or think you're crazy as your comfort is their priority!
good luck and please keep us posted!
Thanks for sharing!
cookie46 x
 
I am anxious days before any appointment. It will be all I think about and it will affect my sleep. When I went into my last Dental surgery to book my first appointment I was very anxious, shaking and could not speak but the receptionist was very nice- she knew what I wanted- she asked would you like to make an appointment, all I could do was nod and she said to me I will give you one as soon as possible so you are not dwelling on itm she gave me an appointment for 4 days times. I know sometimes the wait can be weeks long and I would make myself ill worrying over an appointment for that long. I do always try to tell myself it wont be as bad as I think though. I still do worry inside the actual appointment though. I do hope your appointment goes well for you. ?
 
I'm exactly the same as you - although being in That Chair is way out of my comfort zone, it's better than the waiting! Once I'm in the chair, there's a kind of acceptance/resignation that sets in (I still shake, but not as much as in the waiting-room.) Seeing as I was supposed to go back in July 2013 and it's now March 2014, I'm hardly a shining example, but what I used to do to try to get through the anxiety of waiting was 1) concentrate really hard on whatever I was doing at any given moment, be that accountancy or washing-up, 2) tell my pony everything, he's a great listener and I used to say to him, "3 more visits to you and it will be over and I can tell you all about it" whereupon he would sigh and give me a "kiss", and 3) come on here every day and shout for help! (which was always forthcoming, thank you everyone!) I suffer from IBS, made worse by stress, so I completely understand about the stomach issues and have sometimes resorted to Complan when I am too nervous to eat. I think the best thing is talking about it to any listening ear you can find! Best of luck with your appointment. :XXLhug:
 
Thanks so much to all of you for your support! I've been a member of this forum for a while and is especially nice to 'see' a familiar 'face' -- thanks Aldridge :). I have about 20hrs more to go and I am checking off the list of things to do between now and then. My stomach has been a mess, but otherwise, today was actually a better day than yesterday. Sometimes, I think that my body can only produce so much adrenaline at once before it's all out :). I have a meeting to go to tonight, hopefully a workout in the morning, then work until just after 1pm before I leave for my appointment. I really just can't wait until it's over!

Again, thanks for all the support and fingers crossed that I will not have to go for another 6 months after this!
 
You are welcome to my support; I expect I will need yours in return sometime in the not too distant future. I am thinking of you today. Just think what a lovely weekend you will be able to enjoy when your appointment is out of the way...go on, treat yourself! Good luck. :XXLhug:
 
Thank you! 5 more hours to go... And, I will be happy to be able to return the support when that time comes!
 
Just finished my appt, but unfortunately I have to go back 4/2 for a crown preparation. I asked to be put on a cancellation lost for a sooner apt, because the anxiety of waiting is what kills me. I have 3 other crowns (all of my other 2nd molars) so I'm not surprised by this. My concern now (aside from the waiting) is that the one other tooth that was crowned pre-RCT ended up needing RCT after the crown preparation. The tooth I need the crown on has 2 large fillings already and I'm not convinced that it will survive another round of drilling :(
 
I feel for you! Hopefully there will be a cancellation and you won't have to wait till April. I also hope your worries about RCT prove to be unfounded. I admire your courage. I thought about phoning our surgery yesterday and my stomach promptly dropped like a lift going down 15 floors. You are very brave. :respect:
 
Aldridge - can you email them? Sometimes that's easier for me than having to call. If I was on your side of the pond, I would offer to call for you. Remember, once you make the call, it's one less thing you have to think about :)
 
That's really sweet of you to offer to call if you were in the UK. I'm working on it! They don't have an e-mail address - it is quite an old fashioned set-up in some respects - they don't take card payments either. The area I live in is very beautiful and is described as "a place where time stands still"...and they're not kidding, lol!
Thank you again; hope all goes well for you.
 
The dentist's office emailed me today and offered me an appt for this Thursday (2 days from now). I am grateful that I won't have to wait so long for the appt (and deal with the anxiety until then), but of course I'm wishing I didn't have to go at all. Rationally, I know the appt will not be so bad (though not looking forward to the soreness after), but I'm still getting very anxious. Please send good thoughts!
 
Good luck! :XXLhug:
I feel for you! My app is next week- and I can't stop thinking about it! Keep yourself busy up until Thursday and keep venting on here if it makes you feel better :jump:

Good luck! :clover:

Keep us posted- we will love to hear of your success! :grin:
 
Good luck for Thursday. I will think of you (have to allow for the time difference!) :clover:
 
Thank you both! I'm not sure that I can call anything a 'success' at this point given that my teeth continue to decay despite my obsessive dental hygiene. I know I will go to the appt (I always do), be super anxious, and then be very sore after (for me, crown preparation always seems very traumatic to the gum tissue around the tooth). Added to my anxiety this time is that, when I was there for my cleaning last week, I noticed that there is a new dental assistant. The previous one left to further her training. I find it difficult to think about having to cope with this change.

Aldridge -- my appt is at 2pm eastern US time -- so I think that's 7pm UK time. Thanks for your thoughts :)
 
They just called and have a cancellation for an hour from now... At least there's less time for me to be anxious!
 
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Just came from my appt. No pain at all yet, but I'm still quite numb. I just took some ibuprofen which I'm hoping will start to work before the anesthetic wears off.

There was a new dental assistant who really didn't seem to know what she was doing -- which definitely increased my anxiety. At one point I had to wipe my face off because there was water everywhere. I could tell that the dentist was trying to be patient and teach her, but it was still difficult for me to not have full confidence in what was going on.

Back in a couple of weeks for the permanent crown...
 
You definately aren't alone! I just went through this two weeks ago. I wasn't sure what it was I always feared about a cleaning, but it had been YEARS since I had my teeth cleaned. I had a gum abscess in January, which I had taken care of, all went well, but I knew I had to do something. I had the cleaning done, just a tad anxious but got through it, with no pain! This dentist is new, so I was VERY apprehensive! My dentist of 20 some years, had moved to Florida. I had to see a periodontist for minor gum issues (went yesterday actually for consult) I can tell you, honestly, the anticipation was worse! Once you have the cleaning done, you will be so happy you did! Ask your dentist, if you're uncomfortable, to use a numbing agent on your gums. (not a shot, just something topical) That's what my dentist did. I can tell you, honestly, I felt no pain at all!! If you feel panicky (which I bet you won't) just raise your hand, ask if you can just take a couple deep breaths. It will be over before you know it!
 
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