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how to combat the suicidal feelings

Q

Quixote

Member
Joined
May 22, 2014
Messages
27
I don't think I can be alone in this but I feel genuinely like killing myself with fear/shame over going to the dentist. Every time I think about my teeth I feel like I can feel problems budding everywhere. I look at them like I'm trying to look through my teeth and into the core where all the rot might be.

It just makes me want to die. I don't know what to do. I feel so stupid wanting to kill myself over needing a few fillings.

How do I stop feeling this way? or combat it? I don't have my appointment until the end of July!
 
T

Tink

Well-known member
Joined
May 14, 2013
Messages
755
Location
UK
Hi Quixote -

First of all, have a hug because you sound like you could use one :XXLhug:

I know now it looks bad just now, but really I'm sure it's not as bad as you think and there's light at the end of the tunnel. Your dentist can help you to get your teeth under control, one filling at a time. There are lots of people on here who have been through this process and come out the other end, I'm sure they can tell you about it.

You mentioned mental health issues in another thread, do you have a doctor or specialist who's treating those issues that you could contact? If so, you should tell them about your dental worries and the way you're feeling about this and they should be able to help. A lot of this sounds more like it's coming from wider deep-seated issues like anxiety and low self-esteem rather than directly from the dental stuff, if you see what I mean. If you don't have a specialist, please do consider going and talking to your GP as this sounds like the sort of thing you shouldn't be having to deal with without medical support.

You are not stupid, you're dealing with some difficult issues. Nobody here will judge you for the state of your teeth, or for how you are feeling.

You're in the UK aren't you? It's late, remember things can look very bleak late at night.

If you're feeling seriously suicidal right now, or even just if you need somebody to listen, you can always call the Samaritans (http://www.samaritans.org - 08457 909090). Better to get it off your chest than let it overwhelm you.

You will be ok x
 
Last edited:
Paul T

Paul T

Member
Joined
Aug 8, 2012
Messages
31
Location
Wexford.Ireland
It hurts me so much when I see posts from people who feel that suicide is an option to solve a problem, I have been where you feel that you are (and further, which I will not describe) and take it from me, suicide is definitely not the answer. From experience, low self confidence, low self esteem and body image issues all contribute to other problems in our lives such as Medical, Dental, work and relationship issues. I have been there and have all the T-shirts, which, through the proper help and some hard work on my part I do not have to wear any more.

So back to your problem regarding your dental appointment, have you spoken to the dentist or the dental nurse about your fears?, if not, do so straight away. In relation to your embarrassment, a good dentist will not make you feel bad about the condition of your teeth especially if he understands your fears.

I have not read your previous threads which mentioned your mental health issues so I don't know what steps you have taken to sort them out, having said that, after years of struggling with my own mental health issues I have made huge steps and am happier now than I can ever remember being, due to a good counsellor, GP and meditation. Take life one step at a time, live in the 'now' and remember, what happened yesterday is history and is in the past, what happens tomorrow is the unknown future so we can only deal with the 'now'.

Consider yourself hugged from me :XXLhug: (I don't know if you are Male of Female but that does not really matter) and I wish you the best on your life journey, and don't forget to contact the the dental surgery.
 
Z

zombiegroupie

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 27, 2014
Messages
410
I have been feeling this too, it's not even shame but just pure terror. I hate the fact that i had 2 terrible dentists when I was young and now I'm traumatized for life and to top it off, cursed with weak teeth no matter what I do.

I keep thinking at least if I was dead I wouldn't have to make these appointments! but then my rational mind tells me that my family would be devastated and it's not fair to my daughter who is only 2.
 
Q

Quixote

Member
Joined
May 22, 2014
Messages
27
Thanks for these responses. I feel like I am being ridiculous, but the fear is consuming my entire life and I don't know if I can wait until the end of July to get any kind of answer to the fears I have. It's a long time, and I've been waiting since April already!
 
Q

Quixote

Member
Joined
May 22, 2014
Messages
27
Okay, I rang the dentist to explain my situation with mental health and suicidal feelings, and they've put me on their cancellation list. Thank God. So I might be looking at an earlier appointment which feels a lot better. Thank you so much for all your help.
 
D

DisneyMom

Member
Joined
Feb 24, 2014
Messages
73
I don't think I can be alone in this but I feel genuinely like killing myself with fear/shame over going to the dentist. Every time I think about my teeth I feel like I can feel problems budding everywhere. I look at them like I'm trying to look through my teeth and into the core where all the rot might be.

It just makes me want to die. I don't know what to do. I feel so stupid wanting to kill myself over needing a few fillings.

How do I stop feeling this way? or combat it? I don't have my appointment until the end of July!
Sending big hugs!!! Nothing strikes fear into most us as the word Dentist LOL. When I ring the dentist, fear strikes, then builds up until the appointment, but every time I go, and get the work done, I am always so happy it's over, like a building has been lifted off of my shoulders. And it is never as bad as I build it up to be. A chat with your dentist before your appointment explaining your fears is always helpful, as others have suggested.
 
T

Tink

Well-known member
Joined
May 14, 2013
Messages
755
Location
UK
Okay, I rang the dentist to explain my situation with mental health and suicidal feelings, and they've put me on their cancellation list. Thank God. So I might be looking at an earlier appointment which feels a lot better. Thank you so much for all your help.
Good to hear from you Quixote, sounds like you've done exactly the right thing telling the dentist your situation, hopefully they will be able to help :XXLhug:

You are not being ridiculous, there are lots of people on here who feel the same way. There are some things that some people can just take in their stride but others are completely thrown by - it doesn't make you weak or stupid or anything like that, just human. Doing something about it is brave though. I like to think about it this way; if you're not scared, then it's just doing stuff. Being scared but facing up to it and doing it - that's real courage.
 
Paul T

Paul T

Member
Joined
Aug 8, 2012
Messages
31
Location
Wexford.Ireland
I have not visited the forum for a while but I am delighted that you took the initiative to contact the Dentist and explained you problems/fears.
Did you eventually get you appointment and how did you get on ? I hope it went well for you.
Come back and let us know how you are.
Regards.
Paul.
:jump: :XXLhug: :XXLhug:
 
Q

Quixote

Member
Joined
May 22, 2014
Messages
27
I've now had two appointments and eight fillings. Bit of a jump from only having had one, but there we are, that's life! One was to replace the old filling as a small amount of decay had built up around it.

The dentist and sedationist were both really lovely about my mental health problems and everything was done with the greatest of care and respect.

Unfortunately I do still need to have a root canal on the tooth I initially went to the dentist about (sigh!) because I can only have that under sedation if I pay for it privately. So I'm feeling pretty anxious about that, but I'm no longer battling the same suicidal urges over my teeth.
 
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