I have huge phobia of going to dentist mainly because of embarrassment

[adrian23]

I'm 24 now... The last time when I went to a dentist it was at the age of 15 for a tooth extraction and I had a very unpleasant experience. The dentist there criticized me in front of my mother and even looked at my mother like I was a "bad" kid because I had so many cavities. Then around 2009 my family doctor consulted me for a flue and looked into my mouth and when she saw the teeth she started criticising me and telling my mother "how did he get in this situation...it's sad"... I was 16 back then and that was the point where I got totally shocked about ever going or letting someone looking into my mouth. But with years my teeth got worse and worse and in the last 3 years and a half I started to have around 2 abscesses per year. So around 7 abscesses in the last 3 years and a half.

The problem 2 is that from 2013 my teeth started to get covered in tartar to a point that even on of the frontal teeth is covered half in tartar despite brushing my teeth twice a day. So I will feel utterly shit when the doctor will see all this tartar and possibly think: "What a filthy person". I don't even know with what to start to make excuses and not look like a filthy person. What can I see before he sees my teeth?


The other problem is I have a phobia with the smell in there and the sound of tools... I was through a lot of hospitals when I was a kid and i had multiple surgeries so I developed a huge horror sensation/feel when it comes to the smell of hospitals or stomatology which both smell pretty similar . The tool sound is also scary, like something that penetrate my brain, something very nasty, which gives me horror too.

Then it is the problem that I have with someone working in my mouth, it has nothing to do with pain , I'm not afraid of pain, but I feel an uncomfortable mental sensation when someone is working in my mouth... i feel exposed, vulnerable, uncomfortable .

Also my teeth are very small, and I don't want to have a cleaning for tartar . My father had a professional cleaning for tartar in which his enamel was affected by the cleaning and his teeth got cavities after a period. So I want to tell him not to do a cleaning despite of the big amount of tartar that I have on my teeth... and if I tell him this I'm afraid to not upset him and make him think that I'm a cheap bastard that doesn't care is filthy.

Thank you very much

 

[Colin65]

Hi Adrian,

Like you I had bad experiences as a kid/teenager and my teeth were is a terrible state after decades of not seeing a dentist for those reasons, but I knew I had to do something before I lost them all. I urge you to find an understanding dentist if you haven't already who will not judge you but will work with you at your own pace.
I've now got to the stage where I can lay back in the chair and pretty much relax when having any cleaning done, being seen by the right dentist/hygienist is going to make a big difference for you. I think they'll need to do the cleaning before they start any treatment, you'll be ok once you've been a few time and maybe you could start off by just talking to your dentist about your fears and how you feel.

It's natural to feel uncomfortable and exposed when someone is treating you inside your mouth but this will become easier.
I remember feeling just like you and was so ashamed of my teeth but I had to let someone see them or I couldn't be treated. It wasn't easy but I did it and so can you.
Good luck.

 

[adrian23]

Hi Adrian,

Like you I had bad experiences as a kid/teenager and my teeth were is a terrible state after decades of not seeing a dentist for those reasons, but I knew I had to do something before I lost them all. I urge you to find an understanding dentist if you haven't already who will not judge you but will work with you at your own pace.
I've now got to the stage where I can lay back in the chair and pretty much relax when having any cleaning done, being seen by the right dentist/hygienist is going to make a big difference for you. I think they'll need to do the cleaning before they start any treatment, you'll be ok once you've been a few time and maybe you could start off by just talking to your dentist about your fears and how you feel.

It's natural to feel uncomfortable and exposed when someone is treating you inside your mouth but this will become easier.
I remember feeling just like you and was so ashamed of my teeth but I had to let someone see them or I couldn't be treated. It wasn't easy but I did it and so can you.
Good luck.

Thank you for your answer. About the cleaning, why do they need cleaning for? I only want some extractions and filling.

 

[Colin65]

Thank you for your answer. About the cleaning, why do they need cleaning for? I only want some extractions and filling.

I suspect that within the plaque is bacteria and it would be best for it to be removed because once teeth are extracted that bacteria could get into the extraction site and cause problems, so they need to be as clean as possible first.

I couldn't start my implant treatment without several hygiene visits though that's slightly different because we didn't want the implants to fail due to infection.

If in doubt talk to your dentist who will clarify for you.

 

[adrian23]

Thank you again

I really don't want to do the cleaning... it's not about the pain or anything, but my teeth are incredible thin and I cannot afford to get cavities to them due to damaged enamel. They are so small that they can barely be patched up if something bad happened to them. Anyway I don't find the cleaning needed here because I don't really see how hardened tartar can endanger me. Theoretically eating will be a lot more dangerous after an extraction than hardened tartar.

 

[deku_scrub]

I agree that an understanding dentist is half the battle. I think dentistry has come a long way in the last 10 years, not only with the tools, but with dentists approach to anxious patients. I would mention your fear of losing enamel to your dentist and perhaps they can offer a solution, whether it's a specific toothpaste that strengthens enamel or adjusting your diet. It's easy to see something happen to someone else and think it could happen to us. It's human nature to want to learn from other peoples mistakes. But everyone is different and just because it happened to your father, doesn't mean it will happen to you

 

[Lesley]

Hi Adrian

Hardened tartar is not good. Hygiene ( cleaning) is essential if you want to keep your teeth. If you have a lot of tartar build up, you probably have some sort of gum disease going on...the dentist or hygienist will gently remove the tartar without damaging your teeth! Don't be embarrassed to go. Dentists have seen a lot worse than you, and they will be pleased you are trying to help yourself.

 

[Ellieclarke1989]

I know the smell that you mean, I went to the dentist a few weeks ago couldn't smell it at all, I think they use air fresheners now to cover that smell. Good luck.

 

[Colin65]

Hi Adrian

Hardened tartar is not good. Hygiene ( cleaning) is essential if you want to keep your teeth. If you have a lot of tartar build up, you probably have some sort of gum disease going on...the dentist or hygienist will gently remove the tartar without damaging your teeth! Don't be embarrassed to go. Dentists have seen a lot worse than you, and they will be pleased you are trying to help yourself.

What Lesley said.

 

[BadBreath]

Dude I am in a eerily similar situation as you are. I am very self conscious about my disgusting breath and the state of my teeth. I know dentists have likely seen people worse than me, because my dental hygiene hasn't been terrible/non-existent like some people, but I'm still fearing ridicule.

My poor girlfriend has to deal with my deathmouth because I'm such a coward. I need help.