I just can't do this, overwhelming anxiety.

[thewolfsage]

So I'm 43 and have delt with extreme anxiety ever since I was a kid. I would get therapy and meds for it but I don't have insurance. One thing that makes me extremely anxious is the dentist. It's so bad I can't stand it, so I don't go. Hopefully others here can relate. Well, unfortunately I might not have much of a choice in the matter now. The tooth next to my right front tooth broke almost completely off. I have a couple broken teeth, but this one is super noticeable. I want to get it fixed, at least maybe have a temporary solution put in for the time being. I also only want work done on this one tooth. The others can wait until I have insurance. I know I should make the appointment but I can't bring myself to do so for a few reasons.

-I don't have insurance and can't afford expensive dental work. Even an appointment to get it looked at will take a lot out of my bank account. That's why I'd like a cheaper temporary solution instead of having what remains of the tooth extracted and a bridge put in, if such a thing exists, and why I only want to focus on the one tooth. I just can't afford it. There's just no way.

-The anxiety is overwhelming just thinking about it. The dentist office smell, being in that chair, hearing what the dentist has to say, actually having work done, I can't bring myself to do it. Just thinking about it is enough to make me ant to throw up. I'm afraid that if I actually go I'll have a panic attack right there in the dental office. I really don't cope with anxiety well at all, and this is really more that I can take.

-This might sound strange I know, but I don't want a judgmental dentist lecturing me about how I should have taken better care of my teeth. I know I should have, but i didn't and I feel like an idiot about it. That's my mistake and I'm suffering the consequences. I'm kicking myself enough as it is, I don't need a dentist's help to make me feel awful about myself and the situation. And with my anxiety like it is I don't think I could stand sitting through that kind of lecture. Again, maybe someone here can relate. Or maybe it's just me. But right now I really can't take a lecturing, judgmental dentist. I'm socially anxious, and that would defiantly push me over the edge into panic mode.

So how the Hell do I even proceed here? Make the appointment and take the financial hit? How do I even begin to deal with the crippling anxiety? How do I know I'll get an understanding, non judgmental dentist? Do I do nothing for the time being? I just want work done on the one tooth, what if the dentist wants to do more? What if the teeth next to it won't take a bridge because they're too soft? I know all my teeth are probable bad, but I just want to focus on this one but I'm scared the problem is unfixable, and even if it can be fixed would bankrupt me. I don't want to go in for this one tooth and uncover all kids of other other problems, even though I'm sure they're there. I've read posts on here from people who thought they would get all kinds of bad news but didn;t. I promise you that won't be me. I'm hoping and praying someone has words of encouragement/advice here. I honestly have anxiety about so many other things right now. This is the last thing I need to be dealing with. If location matters, I'm in Minnesota. Thanks for taking the time to read this.

 

[NervousUSA]

Hi, I am sorry you are having to deal with this tough and stressful situation. I wanted to give you a couple things in case they are useful. The Minnesota dental association has some low cost dental treatment options listed on their website https://www.mndental.org/public/dental-care/ maybe you could find something more affordable. I think it is the minority of dentists who are judgemental or will scold. I didn't see a dentist for 19 years, and didn't get that treatment when I went back, I found a dentist whose website said they welcomed people who hadn't been in for a long time. Don't know if you have already seen these, this website has a page about this kind of concern https://www.dentalfearcentral.org/fears/embarrassment/ and also fear of having a panic attack https://www.dentalfearcentral.org/fears/panic-attacks/. I got these links from the common fears page https://www.dentalfearcentral.org/fears/ hope this may be useful to you

 

[thewolfsage]

@NervousUSA Thank you for the reply and the links. I looked an the Minnesota Dental Association site, and found some potential low cost options, so a big thank you for that. I'll be contacting them when they open tomorrow morning. Lets hope one of those works out. I'm also reading the pages on embarrassment, panic attacks and dental fears, which are helping me to feel better. It's comforting to know that other people feel this way too, that is isn't just me. Thanks again. I'll update this post again when/if I find an affordsble dentist who will have me as a patient.

 

[NervousUSA]

@thewolfsage It's true that a lot of people feel this way, which has a silver lining, because it means dentists are used to anxious and traumatized patients, and often nice dentists try and help people to feel more comfortable. I'm glad the links are helping you, they really helped me a lot. I hope one of those options on the website works out too, good luck!

 

[thewolfsage]

So I was able to find a volunteer dentist that can do the extraction for $20. They can't get me in until August, but that's just more time to overcome my anxiety. I'll have to figure out how to get a bridge after that since they don't do that, but I'll hopefully figure it out somehow.

 

[NervousUSA]

@thewolfsage That is great that you found someone to do the extraction so affordably! I wonder if going to a dental school or finding a dentist willing to set up a payment plan might be a good option for a bridge. I wanted to show you this link too, in case you haven't seen it, this might be interesting, it is kind of an overview of dealing with dental anxiety https://www.dentalfearcentral.org/g...-phobia/#dental-anxiety-before-an-appointment

 

[Ginny Bear]

I understand your anxiety about dentists being judgmental. I would say be sure to talk to the receptionist before you make an appointment and be assured that the dentist will not judge you. Then, if you go in and you start to hear judgmental attitude of any kind, promptly end the appointment and walk out. You deserve to be treated with respect and care. No one gets to judge your mouth, how it got that way and you. We’re here for you and just come back on this site and we will support and empathize once again, encouraging you to find a dentist who is compassionate and caring.