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I'm new here. Worried about upcoming appointment and could use advice and encouragement.

  • Thread starter Thread starter autisticbeachboy
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autisticbeachboy

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Dec 31, 2023
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I don't want to overshare, but basically, I have to get a cavity filled. I got traumatized by multiple dentists as a kid, and I don't think I have a phobia of the dentist, because the things I fear literally happen when I go.
Every cleaning hurts me, but I can deal with that pain. I can't deal with fillings.
When I was little I could literally feel them inject the shot. They told me I was "just anxious" and making it up. I was also taken to 2 other dentists that hurt me as well. I feel like I can't say I was traumatized because they didn't mean to hurt me, but it felt like they did. One time he dragged the syringe around my cheek. He also denied that there was any variation in people's jaw structures (Which I know is BS) The only time the dentist didn't hurt was when I got a super strong sedative one time. There's a history in my family of not getting numb I think.

So that's why I hate the dentist... I'm trying not to overshare too much but oversharing is my middle name. I keep freaking out as the appointment gets closer and I have nightmares where I can literally taste the numbing stuff again. I want to hear people's advice on:
1. Is there any natural anxiety remedies that would help me relax? Or anything I could obtain without a doctor?
2. What should I do if deep breathing doesn't help me? Dentists always tell me to do that but it does nothing for the horrible pain.
3. Worst memory ever involves "raincoat" and ring around my tooth, can I avoid this? Cavity is in between teeth.
 
Hey there I totally understand your pain and the extreme anxiety that you can be feeling when it comes to going to the dentist. Quite awhile ago I had to get major major work and almost all my teeth had to get some fillings, and even though it was stressful I made it through! Here are some tips and tricks I can give you, they don't work for everyone but it is how I deal with my anxiety.

1: for me I find that having them explain to me what they are doing helps a lot, just ask the dentist to explain what steps they are doing! You can also check with your general practitioner (regular doctor) about maybe receiving some medicine.

2: deep breaths have never worked for me personally, but I find a weighted blanket helps a whole lot, I have once had a dentist let me where the heavy vest that they use for x rays as one during an appointment.

3: I'm no dentist and cannot answer about the raincoat but it absolutely never hurts to ask for alternatives!

Please remember they are doing their best to help you, and at no point are trying to hurt you. Be open and honest and if you are feeling pain let them know, set up a signal like raising your hand if you are feeling pain that way they can adjust how they work.

I wish you the best of luck and you got this!
 
Anxiety makes everything worse, it even makes your nerves and skin more sensitive. So working on your mindset is key here. Hardly something I've mastered but I'm trying, and once in a while I get into the right headspace where I don't care, so I don't fear, and then I hardly feel any pain.

A gentle, understanding dentist helps a lot, as well as sedation. I've always been happy with my dentist when it comes to the numbing shot - just a little pinch, like he says.

There are some dentists that will offer sedation readily. I would suggest taking some time and doing some research to find the right dentist for you. But just know, you can get better at this, it will just take some time and effort.
 
Hey there I totally understand your pain and the extreme anxiety that you can be feeling when it comes to going to the dentist. Quite awhile ago I had to get major major work and almost all my teeth had to get some fillings, and even though it was stressful I made it through! Here are some tips and tricks I can give you, they don't work for everyone but it is how I deal with my anxiety.

1: for me I find that having them explain to me what they are doing helps a lot, just ask the dentist to explain what steps they are doing! You can also check with your general practitioner (regular doctor) about maybe receiving some medicine.

2: deep breaths have never worked for me personally, but I find a weighted blanket helps a whole lot, I have once had a dentist let me where the heavy vest that they use for x rays as one during an appointment.

3: I'm no dentist and cannot answer about the raincoat but it absolutely never hurts to ask for alternatives!

Please remember they are doing their best to help you, and at no point are trying to hurt you. Be open and honest and if you are feeling pain let them know, set up a signal like raising your hand if you are feeling pain that way they can adjust how they work.

I wish you the best of luck and you got this!
Thank you so much!! :D
 
Anxiety makes everything worse, it even makes your nerves and skin more sensitive. So working on your mindset is key here. Hardly something I've mastered but I'm trying, and once in a while I get into the right headspace where I don't care, so I don't fear, and then I hardly feel any pain.

A gentle, understanding dentist helps a lot, as well as sedation. I've always been happy with my dentist when it comes to the numbing shot - just a little pinch, like he says.

There are some dentists that will offer sedation readily. I would suggest taking some time and doing some research to find the right dentist for you. But just know, you can get better at this, it will just take some time and effort.
I don't even know what to say... I don't want to argue or make this negative but this comment makes me uncomfortable.
 
2. What should I do if deep breathing doesn't help me? Dentists always tell me to do that but it does nothing for the horrible pain.

@autisticbeachboy I don't think deep breathing will do anything much for dealing with physical pain - pain control should be achieved by using local anaesthesia properly, not by some "mind over matter" exercise 🙂.

There's a lot of info here on how to avoid pain during dental treatment:


@Dr. Daniel has also made a video on this topic:


Have you had a chat with your current dentist about this issue?
 
@autisticbeachboy I don't think deep breathing will do anything much for dealing with physical pain - pain control should be achieved by using local anaesthesia properly, not by some "mind over matter" exercise 🙂.

There's a lot of info here on how to avoid pain during dental treatment:


@Dr. Daniel has also made a video on this topic:


Have you had a chat with your current dentist about this issue?
Thank you so much for useful info!! Also I will try to talk to my dentist about it but I'm also nervous to because I don't want him to think I'm being difficult on purpose and make it hurt more. : (
 
If he’s that easily upset he wouldn’t be suited to dealing with nervous patients anyway and you’d be better off finding out sooner rather than later… I reckon it would be well worth raising the issue with him :)
 
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