• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone who is has a severe fear of the dentist or dental treatment. Please note that this is NOT a general dental problems or health anxiety forum! You can find a list of them here.

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Im so thankful to find this forum. Hoping it will help me to move forward and save my teeth



Junior member
Jan 8, 2023
Im 60 years old. And have horrible teeth. I started having dental issues as a child. My parents didnt believe in dentists and i wasnt allowed to go to one until i was already having painful toothaches. I was never really taught how to take care of my teeth. I went to the dentist in pain when i was 10. My Father's dentist was a mean and cruel man. He yelled at me, made me cry, would start drilling my teeth before the novocaine took affect. I stopped going and suffered in silence for years
After getting married at age 26, i found a wonderful dentist. I came to trust him. I had a lot of work done to my teeth and was feeling so much better about myself and my teeth. But after i had kids, i stopped going again. My husband passed in 2019. In 2020 i had 3 teeth extracted. I had another 1 extracted last week. I have a new dentist now as mine retired. I feel as if i have to start over again. I have the same trust issues i did years ago. I hate being in pain all the time. I hate being so terrified of the dentist and how he will treat me. Im embarrassed and ashamed of how bad my teeth have become again. And often wonder if it's time to give up and just get dentures. Or should i keep fighting to keep them? And can i even afford to do that ?
Hi! Welcome. Thank you for posting. I’m glad you did.

I can’t offer any advice (not a dentist), but I can say that you’ve already demonstrated a lot of courage: an extraction, and posting here.

You have a ways to go, for sure, but I think you’re closer to relief rehab you realize.

First up, your old dentists were monsters.

Was your most recent dentist, of your extraction, better?
Hi Beckjayne :welcome:,

I'm so sorry to read about your situation, sounds like you've been through quite a lot in the last couple of years. I'm glad you're here.
Your experience in the childhood sound horrid and I see how trusting a dentist is a huge issue with such past. For most people having to change dentists is a nightmare because just because you were able to tolerate treatment with one particular person, it doesn't mean you will automatically trust someone else. So it's time to establish this trust with your new dentist, learn to communicate with them and find ways for you to be able to cope with treatment. The good thing is - you did it once and you will be able to do it again because now you know what worked for you and what you need to feel safe. When it comes to dentures, I would never try to make the decision based on the level of anxiety with treatment. You'll need a dentist even with dentures. So the question is: if you trusted your dentist and if there were ways for you to tolerate treatment, what would you do?
Let us know your thoughts.

All the best wishes
@Dg6300 Thank you so much for responding to my posts. The extraction itself wasnt horrible. I was allowed to take Xanax before the appt. And he used a lot of novocaine. And very important to me. He didnt rush. He went slow, and kept stopping to ask if i was doing ok. That made me feel as if i had some control over what was happening

The pain afterwards was difficult for about 6 days. But its been about 8 days now, and im feeling quite a bit better. We have a plan for at least the next few months. For me to have some crowns doneIm trying not to think too far ahead
Im really hoping that this new dentist is someone i can trust. Ive been very open and honest about my past experiences and my phobias. I have a plan with him to have him replace up to 6 crowns in this year. Im hoping we can do those, and have a better idea what my chances are, of saving the rest of my teeth. Ive had 6 removed all together now. I have 2 bridges so far, now i need to have something in the other 4 spots. Im looking forward to having more food choices.