• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone who is very afraid of dentistry or who suffers with dental phobia. Please note that this is NOT a dental problems forum! You can find a list of them here.

    Register now to access all the features of the forum.

Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

K

kittykat

Former Member
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

Starting to get worried about my appointment for my fillings.... I went to the office today to give the assistant that helped me get through everything a thank you card, and just being in the office gave me the chills and I wasn't even going there for anything! I'm really worried :( :scared:
 
P

Patti

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 28, 2006
Messages
746
Location
Michigan, USA
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

Hi Kitty, No need for you to stress about fillings. It's really nothing at all, I promise. Just had one and I need 10 more and I'm not even concerned about it. YOu will be fine!
 
chickenjen

chickenjen

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 16, 2008
Messages
1,320
Location
Illinois, USA
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

Hi, kittykat,
Just chiming in about the fillings. I have a whole mouth full.......it's really a breeze. Some of the smaller ones may not even require Novocaine......that's how most of mine were......they zapped them and filled them...no Novocaine required.
The bigger, deeper cavities will need Novocaine. Just make sure they use some topical numbing gel first, wait a bit to let that work and make sure they inject the Novocaine slowly. Then, the dentist should wait awhile to make sure you're numb........that's probably the worst bit of it. After that you're numb, and won't feel a thing.
:welldone:, you did and will do great!!!!
Many :bear:'s!!
 
Kim

Kim

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 4, 2012
Messages
1,859
Location
Hertfordshire
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

Hope all goes well for you hunni - you will be fine I am sure xx
 
K

kittykat

Former Member
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

I guess I'm just more worried about being a wreck when I get there more than anything. I've already made a fool of myself by crying the first time I was there and that was just for a cleaning! Not sure if I'll be able to handle my emotions very well next Friday.... Don't want them to think I'm a hopeless case :(
 
K

kittykat

Former Member
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

About to go to my appointment, getting 5 fillings... freaking out a bit........ I'll let you guys know how it goes afterwards
 
carol999

carol999

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 25, 2012
Messages
478
Location
Yorkshire
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

Thinking of you. I really hope it all goes well for you x:giggle:
 
K

kittykat

Former Member
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

I'm kind of disappointed... the numbing shots hurt me really badly and the nitrous wasn't working for me... I was scared the entire time and there was all this stuff in my mouth so I couldn't tell the nurse to turn up the nitrous... I told her afterwards, so hopefully my appointment next week will be better :(
 
J

jellyfish

Member
Joined
May 15, 2012
Messages
85
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

Sorry you had a bad visit, kittykat! :XXLhug:

Maybe next time you could make a small card that says "More Nitrous" or something, and hold it up during the procedure if needed. Nitrous actually doesn't work for me, it makes me super super super panicked, but most people seem to like it a lot.
 
letsconnect

letsconnect

Administrator
Staff member
Joined
Jan 1, 2005
Messages
5,736
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

Hi kittykat, I'm so sorry you had such a bad experience today :(. I'm not entirely sure why you're wanting to stick with this dentist, it sounds to me as if he hasn't even bothered with having a chat with you or anything, and that his staff just handle everything?

I feel it's really important that you like and trust your dentist, but from what you have described, this dentist seems to build no relationship whatsoever with his patients and just walks from room to room like a mechanic. Is this assessment unfair?

Regarding still feeling numb - you will most probably find that the numbing will wear off soon, though if you're still numb tomorrow, do see the emergency dentist. I also feel that 5 fillings is way too much in one go, especially for someone who is anxious.

I feel that you would be better off finding a kind and caring dentist rather than persevering with this one and reinforcing your fears. Not every dentist is cut out to help people with dental fears.

You've done so incredibly well :thumbsup: - and it's such a shame that this dentist has made no effort to help you. You deserve much better :XXLhug:!!!
 
J

jellyfish

Member
Joined
May 15, 2012
Messages
85
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

re: lingering numbness, the dentist won't consider this an issue until it has been at least 24 hours. The emergency dentist won't be able to do anything about continued numbness, sorry. Most likely it will be fine by morning, tho!

Which teeth did the dentist do fillings in? If they worked on any bottom teeth, did you get a shot waaaaaay back towards your jaw that made your lower lip and half your tongue turn numb?
 
carole

carole

Well-known member
Forum Buddy
Joined
Jan 5, 2012
Messages
7,538
Location
UK
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

Hi, I agree with letsconnect, find another dentist.
About 6 years ago I had a lovely dentist and my phobia calmed right down, I went from being a total mess in the chair to being a bit nervous, then he left and another dentist took over. I was scared of seeing the new one but didn't know where else to go, and I thought I should give him a chance, the new one was horrible and rough, he hardly said two words to me and never smiled. I stuck it out with this man for about 3 years getting more and more scared, all my old fears came back and I was totally phobic.

I went through 2 years seeing him trying to get my mouth treated because I was in agony all the time, he wouldn't listen to me and said nothing was wrong. The outcome of this was a tooth broke, I couldn't face seeing this man again as he had been so nasty before.

I found another dentist, and he had a really hard job getting me calmed down, I needed a tooth out and a rct I never thought I could do this and I was in a right state. Over weeks and months I got the treatment I needed.

I have told you this because it is not worth staying with someone that has you afraid and in pain, it will make you a lot worse, and it will get worse and worse for you to go. If you could find a dentist that could show you some consideration and compassion it would go a long way to you being able to handle the fear.

You deserve to be treated better than you have been :butterfly:
 
B

blackhound

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 23, 2012
Messages
249
Location
Pennsylvania, USA
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

I'm going to chime in and agree with the other comments that suggest you find another dentist. Clearly you had a bad experience and you shouldn't have to endure that. Frankly I think doing 5 fillings on a phobic patient in one sitting is way too much.

BH
 
K

kittykat

Former Member
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

= I'm not entirely sure why you're wanting to stick with this dentist, it sounds to me as if he hasn't even bothered with having a chat with you or anything, and that his staff just handle everything?

In an odd sort of way, I really like that. I always have trouble talking with dentists (I see them as authority figures) and I can connect really well with his assistant, who is so nice to me. I use her as a liaison to communicate... I don't want a relationship with the dentist, only with the assistant, who I'm really fond of and I can tell everything I need to her. Even if I went to someone else who actually chats with me, I would still only talk to the assistant. I think part of the reason he doesn't chat with me is because I don't let him. By the time he got to my room at both of my appointments, I had my noise-cancelling headphones in because I didn't want to talk to him at all. I feel like if any dentist actually sat down with me and chatted I'd be like O___O (deer in headlights) the entire time and not say anything. Not sure if changing dentists would do anything... I don't want to talk to them and glad I don't have to!

Which teeth did the dentist do fillings in? If they worked on any bottom teeth, did you get a shot waaaaaay back towards your jaw that made your lower lip and half your tongue turn numb?

They did 2 on the top way in the back, and 3 on the bottom that were the last 3 in the back. My tongue didn't go numb, but my entire left cheek and lower lip and the left side of my chin did. I took a nap and the numbness is finally gone!

I was scared of seeing the new one but didn't know where else to go, and I thought I should give him a chance, the new one was horrible and rough, he hardly said two words to me and never smiled. I stuck it out with this man for about 3 years getting more and more scared, all my old fears came back and I was totally phobic.


I have told you this because it is not worth staying with someone that has you afraid and in pain, it will make you a lot worse, and it will get worse and worse for you to go.

Like I said before, I'm kind of glad he doesn't talk to me, because I feel like I would panic a lot if I had to talk to him. I have a really hard time communicating in person, but I did talk to him via email regarding getting the right dose of Valium for me, and he seemed like he really cared about helping me. Maybe he actually cares a lot, and also can somehow tell I don't want to \ can't communicate in person. Also, I did write in my note I gave them that I absolutely hate small talk (makes me super nervous) and there's not really much to talk about, the procedure was pretty self explanatory, and he did talk to me during the procedure (but I had my music playing so I couldn't really hear what he was saying)

I'm not very frightened of him doing work on me and not as worried as I was last night for my next appointment for more fillings. I think he did a really good job with the fillings... None of them are too high and making my bite off or anything. And aside from the injection site being sore, I have no pain or sensitivity in any of my teeth, which I was initially worried about when I read online that composite fillings leave your teeth sensitive and sore for about a week. But no pain in those teeth whatsoever, and it feels so much better eating now. (I ate a piece of chocolate pie and it was the first time in awhile that my teeth weren't screaming in pain after eating sweets! :) )

I don't want a dentist that I'm BFF's with anyway. Communicating through the assistant is much better for me. I also think that if I did talk to him I would feel awkward the next time I saw him... Not sure why. Maybe because he's the one doing all the drilling and friends don't do that to other friends? I don't know how to describe how I feel about it, but distancing myself is just fine for me (most of you might think that's crazy, but that's just the way I like it.)

So here's what I'm thinking... Talking to him would embarrass me, but I have a really good relationship with his assistant so she can communicate to him what I want to say, I distance myself on purpose and he probably hasn't talked to me because he can tell I'm not ready yet to talk to him, and even though we don't have any sort of relationship, I trust him with fixing my teeth. I didn't have any pain while he was filling the cavities, but the LA shot kind of caught me off guard. It wasn't too painful that I couldn't handle it, I wasn't screaming or crying or anything, but I wasn't expecting it. I didn't count how many I got, but I only really felt one of them (the one that went in the very top at the back of my mouth) and the rest of them I couldn't feel. Maybe I just felt that one because he went in too deep on accident or something...? And the only post-op pain is from the injection sites and it only feels sore if I open my mouth really wide. He did the injections really quickly (maybe because he knew I was nervous?) but it kicked in really quickly. They started drilling right after they did the injections (and I mean RIGHT after) and I was totally numb after that 10 second time period. Maybe he just uses something that works a lot faster and for a longer time, but it hurts a bit more? Or maybe it was just the site of the injection that is often painful to numb?

The main thing I was concerned about in the appointment was that I wasn't given enough nitrous. It didn't work as well as it did last time (maybe because I was more nervous this time), and I felt really tense the entire time. I told the assistant that it wasn't strong enough and she told me she used the same exact amount as last time when I had my cleaning. But I also read somewhere that it affects you differently on different days... I'll work out a hand signal with her if I need her to give me more, but I told her it wasn't working as well, and she's good at remembering things apparently. (She remembered that blankets made me feel better and put one on me without me having to remind her!)

I don't want to leave their office because it's literally the nicest medical office I've ever been to in my entire life and I haven't been able to find anything else similar to it. They have their walls painted brown, there aren't any pictures of teeth anywhere (I find that to be the creepiest thing ever), there's a water fall in every room, TVs, they give you blankets and warm neck wraps and cool eye gel masks (the most amazing thing ever when you don't want to see anything... also blocks out the bright light.) You never wait in the waiting room for more than 2 minutes and you get a massage after! It's such a great place and the little things like blankets just make the experience so much better. I don't think I'll be switching dentists... too much of a hassle, I really like the assistant, the distancing myself from the dentist is fine by me, and if I did switch offices I know I'd just keep comparing it to the one I go to now and be upset if they didn't have all of the little things I mentioned that made going there a lot easier.

Ehhh I'm so confused. I really like them and everything was great except the nitrous thing (easy fix though) and that one shot. Maybe it was just a fluke...?

Thanks for the support everyone, I really appreciate it! :hug4::thankyou:
 
J

jellyfish

Member
Joined
May 15, 2012
Messages
85
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

Glad to hear the anesthetic wore off! :jump:

As long as you are happy with your interactions with the dentist, it is all good. I have communication apprehension when talking to pretty much anyone in any medical setting (really, from the receptionists up to the MDs/dentist), and have a tendency to burst into tears for no apparent reason during appointments. I prefer that the person I am supposed to be talking to just ignores it, if they try to comfort me or ask why I am crying it makes me waaaaay more upset/frustrated/embarrassed (and then I cry more, cycle of doom). On my first appointment with my current dentist, I cried for probably 20 minutes straight while trying to explain what had gone wrong at my previous (horrible) dentist, and he just handed me a box of tissues and let me keep on talking/crying, which was just perfect.

Getting along well with the assistant is also really important, it is great that you like the assistant there. :clover:
 
K

kittykat

Former Member
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

I have communication apprehension when talking to pretty much anyone in any medical setting (really, from the receptionists up to the MDs/dentist), and have a tendency to burst into tears for no apparent reason during appointments. I prefer that the person I am supposed to be talking to just ignores it, if they try to comfort me or ask why I am crying it makes me waaaaay more upset/frustrated/embarrassed (and then I cry more, cycle of doom).

I understand the "cycle of doom" .... Happened to me at my first appointment
 
letsconnect

letsconnect

Administrator
Staff member
Joined
Jan 1, 2005
Messages
5,736
Re: Less than 4 days til I go for the first time in years.... really nervous, please read and reply

It's horses for courses - if you're happy with your interaction with your dentist, then that is the main thing :nod:. I suppose you can always ask his assistant to do the communicating on your behalf, she seems perfect for you.

And your post really shows just how important the environment is :) - I might not be able to relate to your feelings about the dentist, but definitely feel strongly about the environment, too ;D!
 
Top