E
ella-ella
Member
- Joined
- May 8, 2015
- Messages
- 40
Hi Everyone
I thought it might help me with my own dental journey and fear if I kept a diary here. Reading this site has helped me so much so if reading my ramblings helps one other person, even better.
I'm 34 years old and haven't looked after my teeth for years. As a child I have a vague memory of being knocked out and having 4x molars removed. I have all four of my wisdom teeth, and aside from a tooth I had extracted a few years ago (and another one extracted only this afternoon) my mouth doesn't have any gaps, although it does need work.
I'll try and start near the beginning....
I remember being 17 or 18 and having lots of silver fillings in most of my molars. This dentist was near to where I worked at the time and after those fillings I never went back, I had no need to and I don't really remember having a fear back then.
Ten years later, not long after having my first baby, I woke in the night to horrendous toothache. I writhered around in agony for 2 or 3 days before joining the local NHS dentist and making an appointment. In the time since my fillings as a teenager, I had suffered from depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. I don't know if it was that, or if it was the fact that there was an 'acquaintance' for the dental nurse, or the fact that the dentist was horrid, whatever it was I was absolutely terrified.
I remember the dentist having eyes that never actually looked at you (sorry I don't know the correct term), and her English being quite bad. She told me I had an abscess, drilled down into my tooth to relieve the pressure, prescribed me antibiotics, and wanted me to return for I *think* Root Canal...or possibly an extraction.
Once she'd drilled down the 'acquaintance' asked about my brother (who she used to date) and then proceeded to say extractions were easy and to show me the tools they used. She was incredibly unprofessional.
I never went back.
A couple of years later this tooth had kept breaking away and had only 1/4 left above the gum line. I knew it needed sorting but I put it off and off, until I was in unbearable pain with another abscess that I had no choice but to get it looked at. I point blank refused to return to the NHS practice, and instead found a private practice, rang them up, and got an emergency appointment to have it taken out for £80.
This place was lovely, leather sofa's, free coffee and juice - nothing like a dentists at all! I got a young dentist who I really liked and he had the remains of the tooth out in no time. Yes I was terrified but I was in so much pain I just wanted it to stop. This was the point where I decided I couldn't go through all this again and it was time I got myself sorted once and for all, but it wasn't that simple and didn't happen...
A few days after the extraction I ended up with Dry Socket. I hadn't even heard of it before, i just thought it was normal! Had I of known what it was I could of saved myself a lot of pain by contacting the dentist much sooner than I did. Instead I suffered and struggled until it was so bad I'd of quite happily given birth again, rather than have that pain!
Anyway, the dry socket was packed, it started to heal and I went back a couple of times determined to sort my mouth out. My treatment plan had quite a few fillings on there, I think it came to around £600/£700. I had the emergency extraction, 2 x silver fillings removed and replaced with white. I had every intention of continuing the treatment - I liked the dentist, he was good with me being so nervous and panicky. They even had things like heated mittens to use to take your mind of everything.
But, we just couldn't afford it. So here I am 4 years later in the same position, but even more terrified as I know I can't afford to go private. I have convinced myself that private dentists are the best dentists and that all NHS dentists won't care, especially not about my ridiculous fear of dentists.
Wow that was quite long, sorry but well done if you've made it this far!!
I will continue my story in the comments tomorrow as I have been receiving treatment with an AMAZING NHS dentist for the last few weeks after yet another abscess. I want to keep a record of how much he has helped me and how incredibly proud I am of myself for eventually facing up to the fact that I need to sort my mouth out, and actually going and having treatment. I hope that reading it back will give me that boost I need when I'm almost paralyzed with fear at the thought of my next appointment.
I thought it might help me with my own dental journey and fear if I kept a diary here. Reading this site has helped me so much so if reading my ramblings helps one other person, even better.
I'm 34 years old and haven't looked after my teeth for years. As a child I have a vague memory of being knocked out and having 4x molars removed. I have all four of my wisdom teeth, and aside from a tooth I had extracted a few years ago (and another one extracted only this afternoon) my mouth doesn't have any gaps, although it does need work.
I'll try and start near the beginning....
I remember being 17 or 18 and having lots of silver fillings in most of my molars. This dentist was near to where I worked at the time and after those fillings I never went back, I had no need to and I don't really remember having a fear back then.
Ten years later, not long after having my first baby, I woke in the night to horrendous toothache. I writhered around in agony for 2 or 3 days before joining the local NHS dentist and making an appointment. In the time since my fillings as a teenager, I had suffered from depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. I don't know if it was that, or if it was the fact that there was an 'acquaintance' for the dental nurse, or the fact that the dentist was horrid, whatever it was I was absolutely terrified.
I remember the dentist having eyes that never actually looked at you (sorry I don't know the correct term), and her English being quite bad. She told me I had an abscess, drilled down into my tooth to relieve the pressure, prescribed me antibiotics, and wanted me to return for I *think* Root Canal...or possibly an extraction.
Once she'd drilled down the 'acquaintance' asked about my brother (who she used to date) and then proceeded to say extractions were easy and to show me the tools they used. She was incredibly unprofessional.
I never went back.
A couple of years later this tooth had kept breaking away and had only 1/4 left above the gum line. I knew it needed sorting but I put it off and off, until I was in unbearable pain with another abscess that I had no choice but to get it looked at. I point blank refused to return to the NHS practice, and instead found a private practice, rang them up, and got an emergency appointment to have it taken out for £80.
This place was lovely, leather sofa's, free coffee and juice - nothing like a dentists at all! I got a young dentist who I really liked and he had the remains of the tooth out in no time. Yes I was terrified but I was in so much pain I just wanted it to stop. This was the point where I decided I couldn't go through all this again and it was time I got myself sorted once and for all, but it wasn't that simple and didn't happen...
A few days after the extraction I ended up with Dry Socket. I hadn't even heard of it before, i just thought it was normal! Had I of known what it was I could of saved myself a lot of pain by contacting the dentist much sooner than I did. Instead I suffered and struggled until it was so bad I'd of quite happily given birth again, rather than have that pain!
Anyway, the dry socket was packed, it started to heal and I went back a couple of times determined to sort my mouth out. My treatment plan had quite a few fillings on there, I think it came to around £600/£700. I had the emergency extraction, 2 x silver fillings removed and replaced with white. I had every intention of continuing the treatment - I liked the dentist, he was good with me being so nervous and panicky. They even had things like heated mittens to use to take your mind of everything.
But, we just couldn't afford it. So here I am 4 years later in the same position, but even more terrified as I know I can't afford to go private. I have convinced myself that private dentists are the best dentists and that all NHS dentists won't care, especially not about my ridiculous fear of dentists.
Wow that was quite long, sorry but well done if you've made it this far!!
I will continue my story in the comments tomorrow as I have been receiving treatment with an AMAZING NHS dentist for the last few weeks after yet another abscess. I want to keep a record of how much he has helped me and how incredibly proud I am of myself for eventually facing up to the fact that I need to sort my mouth out, and actually going and having treatment. I hope that reading it back will give me that boost I need when I'm almost paralyzed with fear at the thought of my next appointment.