S
Scaredygap
Member
- Joined
- Nov 27, 2017
- Messages
- 23
Hi, I came across this site a few times in many many panicked google searches over the years but today I have called and made an appointment for an examination with a dentist.
I’ve always had a prominent gap between my two front upper teeth which I was badly bullied over at school. Because of the bullying I spent many years not bothering to do anything. I’d decided it wasn’t worth looking after myself because what was the point. I really made things worse for myself because what started as bullying over a gap in my teeth became bullying because I had greasy hair, spots, smelt funny, bad breath, chubby etc etc. I just didn’t have the energy or motivation to do anything. I’d assumed when I left school and didn’t see the groups of people saying these things anymore things would magically get better but I’d spent so many years thinking of myself as not worth the effort that didn’t happen.
Over time my hygiene improved as I started to make friends and enjoy my job, so my skin and hair got better and well kept. I then began actually brushing my teeth but by the time I started doing that they were in pretty awful condition. The calculus on my front bottom teeth is horrific, and I have some broken teeth at the back.
Over time it has affected how I eat, I can’t/won’t bite into a sandwich like a normal person for fear of those front bottom teeth popping out. Eating in restaurants is fine as I can order something which I can cut up and put straight to a side of my mouth to chew however if out with friends and they want to do something as simple as go to Subway or pick up a sausage roll or something “on the go” I immediately worry how weird I look pulling these things apart to put bits in my mouth rather than just biting into them.
I’ve finally snapped and had enough of living like this. I’ve had people I thought were friends talk about me behind my back and comments in bars and I simply don’t smile or laugh with an open mouth. I’ve made an appointment for an examination tomorrow morning (they had a cancellation and I thought maybe it’s best not having a lot of time to dwell on it).
I’m absolutely terrified. I’ve never been to a dentist, I had a crippling phobia of needles as a child and into my twenties so didn’t go, then as I overcame that I realised how expensive my treatment could be and didn’t go as I was terrified of being told I desperately need X Y Z but can’t afford it. Now I’m worried about the pain and the cost and being told it’s a lost cause now they’re so bad.
I’m holding out hope that maybe this time tomorrow I’ll be overjoyed and maybe I’ll just wish I’d gone all those years ago. I still have several teeth which are striking white next to the others and I can “squeak” with a finger. I hope this means all is not lost
I’ve always had a prominent gap between my two front upper teeth which I was badly bullied over at school. Because of the bullying I spent many years not bothering to do anything. I’d decided it wasn’t worth looking after myself because what was the point. I really made things worse for myself because what started as bullying over a gap in my teeth became bullying because I had greasy hair, spots, smelt funny, bad breath, chubby etc etc. I just didn’t have the energy or motivation to do anything. I’d assumed when I left school and didn’t see the groups of people saying these things anymore things would magically get better but I’d spent so many years thinking of myself as not worth the effort that didn’t happen.
Over time my hygiene improved as I started to make friends and enjoy my job, so my skin and hair got better and well kept. I then began actually brushing my teeth but by the time I started doing that they were in pretty awful condition. The calculus on my front bottom teeth is horrific, and I have some broken teeth at the back.
Over time it has affected how I eat, I can’t/won’t bite into a sandwich like a normal person for fear of those front bottom teeth popping out. Eating in restaurants is fine as I can order something which I can cut up and put straight to a side of my mouth to chew however if out with friends and they want to do something as simple as go to Subway or pick up a sausage roll or something “on the go” I immediately worry how weird I look pulling these things apart to put bits in my mouth rather than just biting into them.
I’ve finally snapped and had enough of living like this. I’ve had people I thought were friends talk about me behind my back and comments in bars and I simply don’t smile or laugh with an open mouth. I’ve made an appointment for an examination tomorrow morning (they had a cancellation and I thought maybe it’s best not having a lot of time to dwell on it).
I’m absolutely terrified. I’ve never been to a dentist, I had a crippling phobia of needles as a child and into my twenties so didn’t go, then as I overcame that I realised how expensive my treatment could be and didn’t go as I was terrified of being told I desperately need X Y Z but can’t afford it. Now I’m worried about the pain and the cost and being told it’s a lost cause now they’re so bad.
I’m holding out hope that maybe this time tomorrow I’ll be overjoyed and maybe I’ll just wish I’d gone all those years ago. I still have several teeth which are striking white next to the others and I can “squeak” with a finger. I hope this means all is not lost