New, frightened and depressed, am I alone?

[postie2096]

First of all can I say how happy I was to find this forum and have a read as a guest during this weekend before registering today. It made me realise that I'm not alone with my lifetime fear about dentists.

Anyway, my story...I'm sure you've heard it many times before but I need advice, opinions and basically some reassurance. I've been afraid of dentists since I was a child as my nhs dentist (more like a butcher) just seemed intent on causing as much pain as he could to my teeth and as a result of this plus generally not looking after my teeth, I have spent the last few years feeling very depressed about the way that I look as my remaining few teeth crumble, get loose and fall out. Even a check up for me was very stressful but recently I was "brave" and visited a local dentist and basically asked him what could be done to be able to make me smile again.

I guess I was hoping for a miracle but his reply was that the only hope I had was to remove my remaining teeth and wear dentures, I came home and cried. I have a fear of dentists and I really fear the feeling of false teeth so how do I manage to be brave enough to have all my teeth removed and then have these in my mouth.

Obviously this fills me with dread but I'm 50 and at the moment I have no life as my appearance has made me very reluctant to go out anywhere as I know that when I talk they are looking at my horrible teeth, my workmates make fun of me behind my back and I work with the public and hate having to communicate with them.

After weeks looking around at options, I feel even more confused. I'm not sure I can go through with any treatment at a dentist but I have to try beat my fear but I'm not sure I can do this for false teeth. I think I could beat my fear better if I was getting dentures on implants but there's no way I could afford them in the UK and if I could save enough to have them done overseas I would consider them but I keep reading horror stories about treatment there. In the UK the prices seem to vary from place to place but sadly the NHS don't do them.

So, what do you do if you are frightened of the dentist, have a fear of false teeth and can't afford implants? You have the choice of having to go through all the pain to maybe be able to smile but have the constant hatred and fear of the false teeth you are wearing OR continue as I am just now which means not having a life, eating soft food on one side of my mouth and constantly checking with my tongue to feel if my loose or broken teeth are still there or has another one started to crumble or come loose.

In short it's depressing me and I don't know how I can get over my fear to visit the dentist for multiple visits to have teeth removed and possibly having weeks with no teeth before the false teeth which I can't face wearing are fitted.

I need opinions, help and even better...a lottery win I'll have a read around and post a few questions elsewhere and hopefully you good members will be able to help, thank you.

 

[lauralou32]

Hi and welcome!! You are not alone! I'm 56 and I did not go to a dentist for 24 yrs! All of my back teeth were broken and my front tooth fell out due to gum disease. I couldn't face anyone! I have a job where I work with the public and see people with perfect teeth all of the time! I was on this site over a year ago asking for help and reading everyone's posts really helped. So I finally decided I did not want to live like this any more, I called a local dentist and went in and explained I had dental fear. I cried and was so afraid of being shamed for the condition of my teeth. The dentist and staff were very kind and compassionate to me and I have had all of my bottom cracked teeth removed ( no pain) and in two weeks I will have a mold made for a bottom partial. Then they will begin work on my top teeth. Which need major work including extractions. I'm not sure how I will pay for all of this I do have insurance but know there will be out of pocket costs. I don't care if I have to make payments for the next 20 yrs it will be worth it. The fear is so much worse then what's on the other side of it. I'm not in your shoes but I know that if I can face this anyone can. I was petrified. Don't wait another yr like I did before you make a move. We all are here for you if you need to talk! Take care and keep us posted! You got this ??????