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Off I go...

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frostgirl

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I thought I'd make a journal to keep my posts together. I'm going to use it to vent out my feelings and worries. So, you've be forewarned.

Yesterday I did something I'd never thought I'd do and I made an appointment at a dentist. The practice I've chosen looks good, and I've got an appointment on October 18th :o I'm trying not to think about it so much but I can't relax. I need a way to take my mind off it. I feel nauseous and nervous all the time. I felt shaky all day. Anyone got any tips on trying to calm down? I can't spend the next two and a half weeks like this.

This will be the first time that I've gone to a dentist since I was about 5 or 6 years old and I'm now 21. I've only been twice in my life before. I remember that he was nice, and I never had any problems, but I feel so anxious and worried about going to see one after 15 years of not seeing one. Pair that with a family who doesn't care about their teeth, and I am extremely worried that I'm going to end up with no teeth by the time I'm 22. I've got it in my head that my teeth are going to be the worse they've ever seen. But I know they won't be. I take care of the best I can and they're clean, and I never have any major problems. The only thing that's worrying me is my wisdom teeth, they are coming in, two have slightly come through, and one is trying to come through on the bottom, but they make my whole head hurt. I've been trying to make myself go to one since I was about 18 but my mental health got worse in the past three years, but I've got to the point where I know I need to go to one.

I'm terrified that I'm going to made to feel embarrassed because of the state my teeth are in, and I have no idea what's going to happen.

Sorry if it's a bit incoherent
 
F

frostgirl

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309
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I'm in two states of mind. Half of me is glad I booked an appointment and part of me is terrified and thinking why did I do it. Argh. It's over two weeks till my appointment and I'm going to be a nervous wreck by the time it comes around. Argh

I know I'm doing the right thing, but I'm so worried and nervous :shame:
 
F

frostgirl

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Uh... I have so many thoughts running through my head. Have I done the right thing? Have I picked a good practice? What if I have a panic attack at my appointment? What if I cry?

I suppose if it doesn't go well, I can always leave and try again elsewhere when I'm ready.

I'm going to be a nervous wreck by this time in two weeks time.

I am glad I managed to make an appointment. It's the first step in getting over my anxiety. And even if I do need a lot of work done, it won't be the end of the world. I've got to remember this.
 
A

ab697

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I can't say much about your wisdom teeth because I haven't experienced the pain you describe but as far as the worrying goes I do have some advice. Before my first appointment to have a filling which was about a month a go (first dentist appointment in about 4/5 years) I was absolutely scared stiff. I knew I'd have to have an injection which is a huge phobia of mine, but I was also scared because I couldn't remember how everything felt and what the process was like. However the way I calmed myself down was to think to myself that it is going to happen, whether I worry myself sick or not, and the fact that it is going to happen is a GOOD thing.

The day before I distracted myself by reading a good book or watching some shows and my mind did wander back to my appointment every so often which is think is completely natural, but I would just say to myself that today was for fun things and all the worry and panic that I felt could be dealt with tomorrow. It helped quite a lot and to be honest by the time I got to the dentist I wanted it over so badly that my anxiety wasn't that high and I was more focused on pushing myself to lay back and open my mouth for the injection because once that was done I wouldn't be anxious anymore.

Obviously if you are made to feel embarrassed then that isn't the right dentist for you. I really hope that you are not made to feel this way. But it is a good thing that you have booked this appointment because now you can address your fears and worries, and the dentist can tell you what, if anything, needs to be done.

I really hope everything goes well. You can do this! :)
 
F

frostgirl

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UK
I can't say much about your wisdom teeth because I haven't experienced the pain you describe but as far as the worrying goes I do have some advice. Before my first appointment to have a filling which was about a month a go (first dentist appointment in about 4/5 years) I was absolutely scared stiff. I knew I'd have to have an injection which is a huge phobia of mine, but I was also scared because I couldn't remember how everything felt and what the process was like. However the way I calmed myself down was to think to myself that it is going to happen, whether I worry myself sick or not, and the fact that it is going to happen is a GOOD thing.

The day before I distracted myself by reading a good book or watching some shows and my mind did wander back to my appointment every so often which is think is completely natural, but I would just say to myself that today was for fun things and all the worry and panic that I felt could be dealt with tomorrow. It helped quite a lot and to be honest by the time I got to the dentist I wanted it over so badly that my anxiety wasn't that high and I was more focused on pushing myself to lay back and open my mouth for the injection because once that was done I wouldn't be anxious anymore.

Obviously if you are made to feel embarrassed then that isn't the right dentist for you. I really hope that you are not made to feel this way. But it is a good thing that you have booked this appointment because now you can address your fears and worries, and the dentist can tell you what, if anything, needs to be done.

I really hope everything goes well. You can do this! :)
Thank you for this, it helps a lot

Some days I think I'll be oddly calm when the day of my appointment comes, and some days I'll think I'll be a nervous wreck.

I'll definitely focus on distracting myself on the day before
 
krlovesherkids777

krlovesherkids777

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I think some of the worst part is the waiting and the worrying.. and I feel you about being embarassed and ashamed, I feel the same everytime I walk in..I sit in my car and take a few deep breaths before going in. listen to my favorite station or lost soundtract on the way over. say a quick prayer and head on in.. Also.. you know, now you can come on here the night before and before you leave to get your last minute support!! people understand that last minute stretch!!

So what made you pick this specific practice anything special? did they impress you in any specific way/ I really hope they are good and kind. :)..
 
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frostgirl

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309
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I think some of the worst part is the waiting and the worrying.. and I feel you about being embarassed and ashamed, I feel the same everytime I walk in..I sit in my car and take a few deep breaths before going in. listen to my favorite station or lost soundtract on the way over. say a quick prayer and head on in.. Also.. you know, now you can come on here the night before and before you leave to get your last minute support!! people understand that last minute stretch!!

So what made you pick this specific practice anything special? did they impress you in any specific way/ I really hope they are good and kind. :)..
I'm definitely going to be on here the night before for some support, I think I may be a nervous wreck by then.

I looked on google for nervous patient dentists in my area, and the one I've chosen was one of the first results. And the reviews were good. I hope they're good and kind
 
F

frostgirl

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I feel so ashamed for wanting to go to a dentist. No one else in my family goes, or even cares about their teeth and I feel so guilty for wanting to go to one so I don't end up losing my teeth.

I can't even tell them that I've got an appointment. And my sister has asked me if I want to go to lunch with her and her friends on the day of my appointment. How can I say no without giving the real reason.

I'm not feeling too bad lately. I'm still going to feel anxious and nervous on the day though :/
 
krlovesherkids777

krlovesherkids777

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Please do not feel bad!! you are taking care of yourself and you will never regret that. take it from someone who didn't for quite sometime, because i never felt I was worth it.. my mom didn't teach me I was, my ex husband certainly didn't either. I had to believe I was and I didn't believe it until I one day walked into a regualar cleaning appt and my sweet dear dentist showed me I was worth it. and she was so kind and patient to a severly abused woman who didn't believe she was worth anything. You are worth it Frostgirl. and maybe by taking care of yourself your family can see that they are worth it and be inspired by you!! We are all here cheering you on to take care of your teeth, your beautiful smile!! :)
 
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F

frostgirl

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Please do not feel bad!! you are taking care of yourself and you will never regret that. take it from someone who didn't for quite sometime, because i never felt I was worth it.. my mom didn't teach me I was, my ex husband certainly didn't either. I had to believe I was and I didn't believe it until I one day walked into a regualar cleaning appt and my sweet dear dentist showed me I was worth it. and she was so kind and patient to a severly abused woman who didn't believe she was worth anything. You are worth it Frostgirl. and maybe by taking care of yourself your family can see that they are worth it and be inspired by you!! We are all here cheering you on to take care of your teeth, your beautiful smile!! :)
Thank you for this. It's so nice to hear you have a nice dentist.

I'd love to be able to smile one day where I don't have to worry about what people will say about me or my teeth. That's the dream.

Thank you for this post though, it's made me feel better about my decision to go to a dentist
 
krlovesherkids777

krlovesherkids777

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Anytime I can help or support you Frostgirl!!

Btw.. you will get opposition from those who don't know to take care of themselves or just aren't encouraging but keep going.. actually.. this dentist that was so compassionate I acutally had to end of leaving, as my ex was so mad she gave me back a piece of my dignity and he was very abusive and controlling so I did end up losing this good one.. but fast forward . I think I hope,, I found another keeper. really great one now :). They are out there and care.. you are worth it :).. I look forward to hearing more of your journey!!
 
Enarete

Enarete

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You are doing the right thing, Frostgirl and don't let your mind tell you something different. I know the waiting is hard and you have a lot of scary and unpleasant thoughts but you will make it and you will be so happy you did. To take care of yourself and your teeth is a gift you are giving yourself and you will be an inspiration to your family in some time. And not just because of taking care of yourself but also because of the great act of courage! Even admitting having dental fear is so courageous.. Most people don't deal with their fears, because it's so hard. But you are on your way. That's huge. Don't let anybody make you feel bad about this journey. You already are a winner.
 
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frostgirl

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Thanks for the support guys, it means a lot to me.

I think if I have too much free time I begin to worry a lot more. I've been at work the past few days, and I didn't think about it much. Thank god I'm at work for most of the next week. I won't have too much time to fret about it and let my mind think too much about how it will go.

I am however starting to panic and think I'll need a lot of work doing. I know that I can't go 15 years between visits without having a problem, but I know that some work will need doing.

And my throat feels swollen so I'm not having a great weekend :shame:
 
F

frostgirl

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Oh my god. I'm freaking out. Have I done the right thing? I know, logical, I'm doing the right thing, I can't keep avoiding it. I need to do this. But I am so worried that I'm doing the wrong thing. I know I'm not.

And I'm so worried about how it will go. Lately I've been feeling calm about it, but this afternoon I was on my lunch break at work, and the scary thoughts and worry came rushing back :shame:
 
krlovesherkids777

krlovesherkids777

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You HAVE done the right thing!! Soon it will be over and you will be relieved and you will be amazed at how brave and courageous you will be as you step into that office and into that chair and know you are taking care of yourself and you are worth it..

I KNOW believe me, I start over thinking everything and worrying and my mind and my emotions go on over kill and i have to intentionally slow them down ... :) its crazy. then its all over... its so human...

I think the dental chair triggers so many feelings of shame and regret and fear ... all in one.. no wonder its not just easy. even if they make it as easy as they can..

anyways.. just to say we are rooting for you,, and you ARE doing the right thing :).. :).
 
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frostgirl

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Argh. I've been put in at work for the day of my appointment. I don't know whether it would be a good thing or a bad thing to go to work two hours after my appointment. Argh. I suppose if I am at work after it, then I have to go to my appointment because I don't want to miss a day of work :(
 
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frostgirl

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It's less than a week to my appointment now. Argh. Half of me is freaking out and half of me is sort of looking forward to going. I'm worried I'm going to have to rearrange it because I'm ill at the moment. Hm.

I'm still slightly worried about how it will go though.
 
Enarete

Enarete

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You can make it, frostgirl! Try to listen to the good voice, it's the right one. You are and will be very nervous, that's a part of the process, but being nervous doesn't mean that something goes wrong. It means that something goes well.

I hope that your illnes goes away fast - maybe in one week you're fine again?
 
thedogdemon

thedogdemon

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I'm terrified that I'm going to made to feel embarrassed because of the state my teeth are in, and I have no idea what's going to happen.
I went the other day, and was not made fun of for my poor oral hygiene. I was told after the cleaning and such "you need to brush and floss 2x a day everyday". The dentist and the assistant did not yell and scream at me, but just said it in a nice calm tone. It was a family dental, so kids and such can go there too.

I need to get fillings done, and that part freaks me the heck out more than the cleaning itself does. I have gotten cleanings done before and they are not painful at all.

edit: I didn't get the cleaning done due to no money. forgot to mention.
 
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frostgirl

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It really hit me yesterday that I'm actually going to go through with it. Bloody hell. I've spent years trying to get the courage up to go to one, and I'm actually going to go to one on Wednesday. Arh.

I know that nothing major is going to happen on the first appointment. But I'm terrified. I'm so worried about how it will go.
 
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