• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone who is has a severe fear of the dentist or dental treatment. Please note that this is NOT a general dental problems or health anxiety forum! You can find a list of them here.

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Off I go...

I agree with Kitkat and believe you will too ! Its not easy but you have what it takes.!
 
frostgirl said:
After having a few busy months, I finally have some time for myself. And I want to overcome this anxiety I get about even just the thought of going to a dentist. I don't get why I can't just pick up the phone and ring and make an appointment. And I know the first appointment will just be for a check up, nothing too overwhelming and scary. So why can't I do this? I've faced other fears, so I don't get why I can't face this one? I've managed to do it once, why can't I do it again.

I do want to ask a close friend for help, to see if she could recommend a dentist. But I just feel awkward about even bringing to it up with her.

I just feel so hopeless :redface::shame:
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Glad to read you are ready to move things forward. Well, I still think that maybe doing that call is not the right thing to do. If it was you would have done it. Sometimes it's some unconscious things that make us feel uncomfortable, maybe the last visit wasn't good enough to get you back on track, maybe it's just better to look for a different dentist. As you are considering to see someone else anyway, there will be plenty of time until you get to that call - finding a practice, looking on their homepage etc. might make you more ready for that call. Dental anxiety is not logical, if it was, we would all go because we theoretically know that nothing bad will happen. It's our anxiety that doesn't know. The good thing is, you can start anew at any time and once you have found a pace that is comfortable, you will be fine. We all believe in you here :)
May I ask what it is that makes you feel awkward about asking your friend for a recommendation?
 
Thank you Enarete, I appreciate your help.

I've been having a look at the websites and Facebook pages for a few practices that I want to consider. It's just I'm debating between going private or using the NHS. One of them looks really promising, really good reviews on Google and Facebook. So when I'm ready, I will give them a ring.

I just feel so awkward asking my friend about it because I don't want to tell her that I get so nervous about going to the dentist.
 
frostgirl said:
I just feel so awkward asking my friend about it because I don't want to tell her that I get so nervous about going to the dentist.
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I bet your friend is not too comfortable about dental visits either, as most people are. And they all feel too uncomfortable to talk about it. I remember as I started working in a dental practice, there is the phase where people ask you what's new etc... and then you say dental practice and nervous patients and EVERYONE goes like omg, yeah, I am really scared of the dentist as well, you know, I had this experience..." the mildest version is the "I hate going to the dentist". The best part is then to find out that a half of the practice staff is nervous :)
 
Thanks Enarete, it's actually comforting to read that, haha :)

I might ask her when we're next chatting, thanks
 
Well I sent my friend a text message asking her for recommendations. Let's see what her response is. Hopefully helpful, as she is normally a helpful person.

I've been looking at a good number of dental practices in my area and I still can't make my mind up. I'm lost, and even though the reviews on the ones I'm potentially considering are good, I'm paranoid that if I do go to one of them that it's going to be the complete opposite of what people have said. Argh
 
frostgirl said:
I've been looking at a good number of dental practices in my area and I still can't make my mind up. I'm lost, and even though the reviews on the ones I'm potentially considering are good, I'm paranoid that if I do go to one of them that it's going to be the complete opposite of what people have said. Argh
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Hope your friend will give you some good recommendation. Reviews can always be fake, but if you look at the practice as whole (what they say on their homepage, what impression they make on the phone) you might get a good feel about whether they will be nice.
 
Frostgirl.

I hope you can really find a good fit that makes you comfortable.. One suggestion I have is trying to fb some of the dental practices to kind of test the waters... I did this when my past dentist left his practice and I needed to find someone.. I started to write clinics.. and tell them I was an anxious and ashamed patient and how did they deal with anxious patients.. its important I think to ask HOW they work with anxious patients not if.. as many do but not all have same philosophies. anyways.. It ended up that several dentists.fbed me back themselves, were very reassuring and caring, even after hours they took their time to reassure and encourage an anxious patient.. and invited me in to meet them free of charge.. the ones that did that.. were mostly amazing.. 3 out of 4 were. so I'm glad I met them before treatment to talk and get a feel for them in general. Just an idea to pass on. Even though I ended up finding my old dentist at another practice and not going with these , I have been referring others to them because of their kindness and have gotten amazing feedback.

HOpe all works well for you. You deserve the kindest care!!
 
krlovesherkids777 said:
Frostgirl.

I hope you can really find a good fit that makes you comfortable.. One suggestion I have is trying to fb some of the dental practices to kind of test the waters... I did this when my past dentist left his practice and I needed to find someone.. I started to write clinics.. and tell them I was an anxious and ashamed patient and how did they deal with anxious patients.. its important I think to ask HOW they work with anxious patients not if.. as many do but not all have same philosophies. anyways.. It ended up that several dentists.fbed me back themselves, were very reassuring and caring, even after hours they took their time to reassure and encourage an anxious patient.. and invited me in to meet them free of charge.. the ones that did that.. were mostly amazing.. 3 out of 4 were. so I'm glad I met them before treatment to talk and get a feel for them in general. Just an idea to pass on. Even though I ended up finding my old dentist at another practice and not going with these , I have been referring others to them because of their kindness and have gotten amazing feedback.

HOpe all works well for you. You deserve the kindest care!!
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Thought I would share the responses of the dentists I reached out to .

dentist #1. thanks so much for reaching out to us! I know that coming in to see the dentist can be a very scary and nerve wracking experience. My team and I do everything we can to prevent anxiety and make every anxious patient as comfortable as possible while they are under our care. There is absolutely no charge to meet with me before a formal exam, and I would love to discuss all the ways that my team and I can help you restore confidence in your smile. Please give us a call next week (we are closed the remainder of this week) to schedule a time to meet. I admire your bravery for reaching out and I look forward to seeing you!

dentist #2. I am definitely willing to meet and chat for 10-15 minutes one day. We could discuss a bit of your dental history and I could show you the office. There would be no charge for that. I have a lot of experience with anxious patients as dental anxiety is very common - you are definitely not alone. We see varying degrees of it everyday in our practice. , one of our hygienists, would be the best for someone with anxiety as she has over a decade of dental experience and has a very calming presence. We would love to see you at our practice- we do not judge anyone and just want to provide you with great dental care.
Thank you,

dentist #3
That’s our specialty. We are open tomorrow morning but I’m not sure of our availability. I want to make sure we can give you enough time. Why don’t you call and set up a time just to meet and we can see how it goes. We never judge and I commend you for trying to improve your dental health.
 
Thank you krlovesherkids777, your advice is a good idea. I have tried emailing practices in the past before, but I never got a response at all. I have been thinking of messaging a few practices on Facebook, as their Facebook pages seem more active than if I was to email them. I'll definitely try that, thanks :)
 
Well, my friend responded to my message asking her dentist recommendations, and she's recommended one that shares the building with my GP Practice. Going to the doctor gives me enough anxiety, I don't want to go there and then sit in the same waiting room for the dentist. And I have read some questionable things about it. It's part of a local chain of dentists, and there's some good reviews for certain dentists there, but I've read a lot more worse reviews. A lot of people in my local Facebook group have said to people when they're looking for recommendations for a dentist to avoid this practice, because the main dentist there has not cared at all about their anxieties/phobias and told them to stop acting silly. And after having a look at their website, the only time they mention nervous patients is when talking about sedation. So I'm just not going to even risk it. I don't want to be referred for sedation, because I would have no one to drive me there and stay with me, and I don't like the idea of sedation.

I've got three or four different practices in mind that I'm going to get in touch with and see what they're response is like. I'm feeling a bit nervous about this but not too much, I can do this. I'm just worried that I might not get any response and I'll have to ring them, which I don't feel comfortable to do just yet. I will do this.
 
Frostgirl,

Sounds like several reasons not to try that place and good reasons too. Good for going with your gut and wanting to try places that seem to be a bit more anxious friendly. No one needs to be told to quite acting silly in the dentist when we are nervous.. Its a normal human thing to be .. and there are so many kind compassionate dentists who will not do this.. I really hope you can get in contact with one soon for maybe a meet and greet..
 
frostgirl said:
I'm just worried that I might not get any response and I'll have to ring them, which I don't feel comfortable to do just yet. I will do this.
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If a practice doesn‘t reply to an email of a nervous patient, then they are not worth it to be called so I can only encourage you not to stretch yourself and doing just what you feel comfortable to do. Many people do not feel comfortable to call.
In the hypothetical case of a practice not getting back to you, if you wanted to rule out the possibility of the email getting lost, you could still send them another email to ask whether they got the first email :)
 
Just wanted to say I'm in a similar situation as you and to wish you luck. Fingers crossed social media and reviews can correctly guide us. ;)
 
Sol said:
Just wanted to say I'm in a similar situation as you and to wish you luck. Fingers crossed social media and reviews can correctly guide us. ;)
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Yes, I have my fingers crossed for both of us. I was going to send a message to one practice whilst I was on my lunch break at work, but I was enjoying being able to finally sit down too much I didn't even look at my phone. I'm going to send a message or email to one or two of the practices I like the look of, tomorrow when I have some more free time.
 
Well I've sent an email to one of the practices I'm considering. Now I'm dreading how long it will be to get a response. I feel a bit shaky with nerves after sending it now. But I'm glad I did it. Hopefully their response is positive.
 
I hope you both get some good responses. !
 
Well I've got a response. I didn't expect to get a response so quickly. I had asked if they were taking on new patients and how much the first appointment would cost, and then I also asked how they treat anxious patients, and I just briefly explained I get a lot of anxiety about going to the dentist. They replied back and said they are taking on new private patients, and explained how much the first appointment would cost. They also said that they have very patient dentists who treat anxious/nervous patients. So it seems like a decent response. I'm going to contact a few more practices and see what their responses are like.
 
frostgirl said:
Well I've got a response. I didn't expect to get a response so quickly. I had asked if they were taking on new patients and how much the first appointment would cost, and then I also asked how they treat anxious patients, and I just briefly explained I get a lot of anxiety about going to the dentist. They replied back and said they are taking on new private patients, and explained how much the first appointment would cost. They also said that they have very patient dentists who treat anxious/nervous patients. So it seems like a decent response. I'm going to contact a few more practices and see what their responses are like.
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Amazing!! That‘s great. I think getting a quick response is a good sign. Keep on going, hope you get great responses from the other practices as well.
 
I felt brave enough to get in touch with another practice today and I sent an email to them. It's basically the same email I sent the first practice, but it's short and concise (I think). I know I won't get a response until tomorrow morning after 9am (at the earliest), but I don't mind.
 
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