please, im begging i need encouragement

[dental1234]

I am 35 and lost almost all of my molars and some upper molar too.

I haven't told anybody in my lifetime (except dentist) that i am dental phobic.

And now I am scheduled for an extraction due to unsuccesful root canal in a few weeks.

My problem is I really want to open up with my husband re my phobia and my upcoming extraction.

I REALLY FEEL INSECURE TOWARDS MY HUSBAND REGARDING MY TEETH. I DONT HAVE PERFECT TEETH (BACK ONLY) BUT MY FRONT TEETH IS JUST OKAY.

PLEASE HELP ME HOW CAN I TELL MY HUSBAND MY DENTAL PHOBIA. I AM SO TRULY VERY EMBARASSED ABOUT THIS.

i beg you please i need help. I am losing my self esteem already and my confidence.

Thank you so much and I am hoping to hear even 1 reply regarding my post.

THANK YOU SO MUCH IN ADVANCE

 

[dental1234]

i need anybody's help, please

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

 

[Stress Doc]

Hi dental1234

Dental phobia is very common. There are between 30-50 million people in the USA that have dental phobia to the degree that they will not seek dental treatment.

It is nothing to be ashamed of, as it is a real condition. The main feature of it is that it tries to convince you that you are hopeless and helpless, which you are not.

It also makes you very self conscious and unworthy (social anxiety).
This fear centers on the belief that you will be judged based upon the phobia. No one is perfect, we all have challenges.

Keeping this to yourself does not help, as the condition does not get better by avoiding it.
I have found one of the best things to do is to ask for help and support. Your husband is more than likely willing to support you. The anxiety is trying to convince you that you are all alone. I seriously doubt he would judge you based upon the condition of your teeth.

It can be difficult, initially, to face this on your own. Marriage is a partnership, that which affects one, affects both.

Together both of you can come up with a plan to deal with this. It is not weakness to ask for help, it is a sign of strength.

I have worked with people with anxiety disorder for decades. When they begin to reach out for help and support, the healing begins.

If I can help, let me know.

Blessings

 

[dental1234]

Thank You Very Much For Taking Time To Read My Post.

Honestly Speaking You Are The Very First Person Who Encouraged Me Regarding My Phobia In My Entire Life.

May You Be Blessed Doctor.

I Forgt To Mention That My Marriage Is Very Strong Its Just That I Haven't Mention To My Post That He Rarely Gives Me A Kiss On My Lips After He Saw That One Of My Upper Tooth Is Missing. And That Gave Me Really The Impression That He Judges Me, Discretely.

 

[Stress Doc]

Hi dental1234

There is another possibility. He might think your mouth is very sensitive and not want to cause you pain. I am glad you have a strong marriage. Many times the people that love us do not know what to do or say. This is not due to indifference, but just a feeling of helplessness as to what to do.

If we know someone we care about is sensitive to an area of their life we tend to leave it alone.

Anxiety and phobia may seem overwhelming but it is fixable. It takes some time and being a bit uncomfortable at times but it responds to positive action.

This condition does not stay confined to one area, it spreads. Life becomes a scary place and the world is seen as unsafe.

Anxiety comes from a belief that we cannot handle whatever we are afraid of. If we are not afraid of something we do not connect anxiety to it.

The way this works is we develop a perception about something. From perception we develop belief. From our beliefs we take actions.

Therefore, if we change our perceptions we will develop different beliefs and we will take different actions.

If not, the following will continue to be true.

"If you want to keep getting what you are getting, keep doing what you are doing."

The first step in the process is to begin to rebuild belief in yourself and your ability. I like to call this re-introducing you to you. We are amazing and can do almost anything we are committed to achieving.

Remember, "The past does not equal the future"

If you want to chat, PM me.

Blessings

 

[dental1234]

Just Posted Pm For You.

Stress Doc Thank You So Much For Taking Time To Listen To Me.

You Are A Blessing To Me.