• Dental Phobia Support

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Scared of Upcoming Dental Work

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scaredykat11

Member
Joined
May 19, 2019
Messages
27
Location
US
Hi! I'm new, but I've been lurking for a few weeks now ever since I learned of the dental work I need.

I'm 39, I do have generalized anxiety disorder, and going to the dentist is one of my phobias. Before Christmas '18, I needed to go because I got a bad abscess. I researched the best dentists that deal with nervous patients and found one who was really kind and considerate of my needs.

She pulled my tooth even though I was shaky and nervous (and panicky), and 2 weeks later pulled another! I still can't believe I did all that! But really, the pain was just to much to handle.

But now, I need a lot more work. I need a bunch of fillings and... gulp... a deep cleaning. :cry: Deep cleanings scare me because I remember when my mom had one done, she came home crying and bloodied, and I swore I would never, ever get one of those!

So for the last few weeks, I've been dreading my appointments. I even dread going for the fillings. For some reason, I fear the anesthesia won't wear off, or something else will happen. Even though I was able to get through it in December, I still have these "what-ifs".

I'm also working on it with my therapist. She's suggested trying to visualize my appointment in a positive way, but all I do is think so negative.

How do you get past this?
 
Keep doing exactly as you are doing.

You are well on your way.
 
Hi,

It sounds like you are doing well in facing the difficulties and challenges. Please continue in this direction.
I do think that in your case instead in advancing in baby steps you had quite difficult treatments (extractions no less) and still you prevailed.
Dentistry has changed dramatically in the last few decades. There are ways to address any issue and concern. For example: if you want to avoid bleeding and discomfort during cleaning, you can rinse your mouth for a few days with an antibacterial rinsing (such as Chlorhexidine) and then the gum inflammation is lessened and with it the bleeding and discomfort.
I think that my video about dental fear can help:

All the best.
 
Scaredykat,

I agree with Dr Daniel and Dg6300. You have been through so much and are so brave , even if the anxiety is going on full speed. I soo get that !! You are doing so many things right. Coming on here, even just looking first, then writing and seeking support, going to your appts, even though it was scary. , and going to therapy and working through the what ifs.. I have done this soo much.. the what ifs.. agh.

Does your dentist know the level of anxiety you have? have you ever talked to them about this? I know it is hard and I did not for years, I would just go in the chair and freeze through my work,, or.. I wouldn't make it through and just leave.. but I think telling my dentist all my fears as crazy as they seemed to me,, from him dropping stuff , to him thinking I'm the worst patient ever , to needle fears or fears of what I would find with my teeth. Everytime I presented my fears, he was so kind and helped me come out the other side stronger and feeling better.

It took alot of courage and help of my therapist and here to feel the courage to do this and I tested him, He was really safe.. and has come to be a super great inspiration to me . I hope that you can find a dentist like this too!! But on your end.. you have what it takes..
 
Thank you everyone for your kind words.

I'm trying to be more positive about my upcoming appointment. When I have negative "What ifs", I counter them with positives.

Like: What if I'm in more pain afterwards?
Changed to: What if I have no more pain? That would be lovely!

Yes, my dentist knows my level of anxiety. She's offered a few things for me: anxiety meds, nitrous (which makes me sick), and just stop/go signals. I opted for the stop signals, and asked her to tell me everything she does before she does it.

The last appointment to get the tooth extracted in December was a little rough. She had to poke me with anesthesia 6 times before she could finally get the tooth out. And I'm still having pain next to the extraction site 6 months later. She says it's just a small cavity, but it's a weird squeeze feeling -- kind of feels like my gums are swollen -- that gets worse throughout the day.

I considered a second opinion, but I only get Medicaid and can't afford to pay for a second opinion. It's really difficult in my city to find a dentist that accepts Medicaid so I'm kind of stuck hoping that what she says will work to help.

I have less than 3 weeks to go. I'm thinking of calling the office tomorrow for a rundown of all the work I'll be having on my first appointment, in layman's terms.
 
Changing your negative thoughts to positive thoughts? You are one smart cookie.

Speaking of cookies, I hope you are ready to eat all the wonderfully pointy and deliciously crunchy cookies. You are on your way.
 
So I called the dentist last week and asked her for a full rundown of the work I will have on my first appointment. I only have 3 fillings to get, and they're pretty small. I asked her if she needs to give me the nerve block shot that numbs the whole side of the mouth, and she said she should be able to just do it with a local anesthetic.

The teeth that need fillings is a premolar on the right hand side, #10 and #11 on the top. Do you think my nose might feel numb?

Out of curiosity, I searched "The wand" on Youtube. I don't think I've ever seen this device used at any of my previous dentists. And I really doubt my new dentist has it. They seem pretty old school, just gentler.

But maybe I'll ask the dentist when I go in. I only have less than 2 weeks left! o_O
 
Scaredykat11,

Sounds like you are getting more and more information and just mentally prepared more each time.. That is so awesome.. That is great you can call and ask for a run down like this and seems they communicate pretty well too. I've only seen one dentist that has had the wand and to me it didn't make any difference as his shots didn't hurt either way. I also do not remember my nose being numb on fillings 11 and 12 when I had them with a few local shots. :).. It sounds like you and your dentist both have what it takes to make this a kind ,gentle and painfree experience.. Wishing the best for you!! :)
 
I only have 3 days left until my first appointment and I'm getting really, really anxious now. The fearful "what ifs" are bad (and irrational) but it's really difficult to handle them.

I still try to counter my fear with positives, remembering that I could be out of pain when this is over. It's just super difficult.

I also remind myself that the anticipation is probably worse than the appointment itself.
 
It sounds like you have done really well so far! The only time I recall feeling numb in my nose was for wisdom teeth extractions and an upper root canal. The anticipation is almost always worse than the actual treatment and strangely, I sometimes find that I am calmer during treatment than I am in the time leading up to the appointment. It’s great that you have felt assertive enough to call and get additional info so that you know exactly what to expect. Stop signals and my dentist telling me everything she was doing throughout treatments helped me a lot in the beginning with building trust.
 
Well, today is the day. :faint: I didn't sleep very well last night but I'm trying to stay calm this morning.

Hopefully, I'll edit this post after the appointment with good news!
 
Good luck!

You’ve got this.
 
I did it... kind of. I got one tooth filled, that is. The dentist only used the local anaesthetic for the bottom like she said.

It was nice and numb for a while there but then she started poking and prodding to pull the gum down (I really don't know) and I felt it. After that, I felt it every time she used the high speed drill. Not super painful but very sensitive.

I raised my hand and told her I can feel that. Luckily, she was almost done. She finished up and asked if I want to do the two upper teeth today or wait.

I was so shook up that I decided to wait. I have another appointment for the upper teeth next Friday so I'll do it then.

But I am proud of myself for going through with it. *breathes*
 
Whenever I go to the dentist, I usually take an anxiety pill beforehand to help me calm down because I am always extremely anxious to the point of tears. I also tell myself that they’re here to help me and that I have to trust what they’re doing and suck it up for the time I’m there. I figured I can do anything if it’s just for a short time and if I focus on the end point. I also try nice deep breathing and I’ve been able to put in headphones in the past when I had crowns placed so that I could listen to anything else but the instruments. That doesn’t work for everyone though of course. My anxiety really starts when I get home from the dentist. I wish you the best of luck.
 
I did it... kind of. I got one tooth filled, that is. The dentist only used the local anaesthetic for the bottom like she said.

It was nice and numb for a while there but then she started poking and prodding to pull the gum down (I really don't know) and I felt it. After that, I felt it every time she used the high speed drill. Not super painful but very sensitive.

I raised my hand and told her I can feel that. Luckily, she was almost done. She finished up and asked if I want to do the two upper teeth today or wait.

I was so shook up that I decided to wait. I have another appointment for the upper teeth next Friday so I'll do it then.

But I am proud of myself for going through with it. *breathes*

Sorry you had a difficult time! It sounds like you did very well despite everything! Well done for asserting yourself in alerting the dentist when you had pain and respecting your limits when you knew you had enough for one day. I have always had a very difficult time getting numb with bottom teeth and usually leave the office in a pretty frazzled state. I do not run into this problem with top teeth and have also read that bottom teeth are more tricky to numb just because of anatomical differences in the nerves. I have a feeling that you will more than likely have an easier experience with the top teeth next Friday. Please let us know how you get on!
 
Thanks, everyone. I really hope it's easier on Friday. I'm still anxious to go. The dentist said I may have numbing up near my nose.

This tooth she filled on Friday still has the weird "squeeze" feeling. I wonder if there is some nerve damage?

She also drilled the top out to a point and I keep messing with it with my tongue. *sigh*
 
HOpe it goes well for you scaredykat!:grouphug::clover:
 
And done! Today was fillings #2.

I got all 3 done on the top side. It was difficult at first because I felt more nervous this time than last week. Not sure why. I did sleep pretty well last night despite being anxious all day.

Today, I needed to just go and sit in the chair with the topical on my gums for a little bit before I was calm enough to do anything else.

But I got them done. I'm still very shaky and felt dizzy afterwards. It wasn't completely painless. When she puts in the "wedges" between my teeth, it stung on the back where I wasn't numb.

Unfortunately, I might not be able to do the deep cleaning in July because my insurance may not cover it all. We talked about pushing it back to next year.

I'd like to keep trying to conquer this phobia so I'm a little less shaky and nervous each time.
 
Sounds like you did really well even through your shakiness and nervousness you did it! :welldone::cheer2: It is a bummer insurce doesn't cover more. I know I too can only do so much due to finances/coverage. Sounds like you made some positive moemntum and really it sounds like you ARE conquering this one step at a time!! :)
 
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