• Dental Phobia Support

    Welcome! This is an online support group for anyone with a fear of the dentist, dental phobia, or specific dental fears.

    It's a supportive space to talk to people with similar experiences, and get advice and information.

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Scared to death of the dentist!



Junior member
Nov 9, 2020
I'm a 32 year old woman, I haven't been to the dentist in over 10years other than going when I have an abscess for anti biotics (bad I know)

The reason I haven't been in so long is because when I was younger I had a dentist who was awful. At my first appointment with her she told me my teeth where awful and that I'd need a lot of work doing to them. She then proceeded to tell me off and said if I wasn't going to stick to looking after them she wouldn't do the treatment.

I went back for an extraction and I could feel the tooth being pulled it was so painful, I told her this, she managed to get a bit of it out then I couldn't take no more I had to go to an emergency dentist to be 'knocked out' to get the rest of that tooth out. Daft to say I never went back to that practice.

My two front teeth broke later on down the line, I was so embarrassed so I went to another dental practice, they referred me to have my front teeth out and gave me a temporary denture. I spent time getting to know that dentist who I actually quite liked, then she moved away :(

I never went back since then as I was well too nervous!

However I am now in agony with my teeth, every time I eat something I'm in pain, I have several cracked, broken and missing teeth. I'm ashamed, I hide my mouth when I speak to someone I never smile either. I can tell people are looking at my mouth when I speak.

I am braving the dentist today, I made an appointment last week and they said they will see me to sort out my abscess and do a consultation (treatment plan) I think I'm more scared about being told.off and embarrassed about the state of my teeth than anything else.

I know I'm going to have a lot of work that needs doing, but I'm scared of being told :( I'm such a nervous person, and I'm making myself go alone today as I don't want friends/family seeing the state of my mouth :(

I'll update this when I know what treatment I'll need but any advice would be amazing please. I'm so scared :(


Staff member
Jan 1, 2005
Hi and welcome :welcome:

Congratulations on making an appointment - that's an incredibly courageous thing to do!

I don't know if you'll see this message before your appointment, but wanted to wish you lots of luck for today ? ? ? . The one piece of advice that was really useful to me is this: be honest and open about your fears. I re-read an interview on this website the other day with Lincoln (one of the dentists who offers advice on this forum) and he said:

"I think the most important thing is to not try and cover it up. Just go in and say “I’m so frightened, I’m so scared, I don’t like this”. Don’t worry. Just be totally honest, tell them as much as you can. Because if they’re not prepared to listen, they’re not the right dentist for a nervous patient. So try them out. Tell them everything, what you don’t like. What you’re worried about."

Please let us know how you got on :grouphug:

P.S. The full interview is here (in case anyone is interested):