• Dental Phobia Support

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Scared to even call

A

AllieIsScared

Junior member
Joined
Jun 23, 2024
Messages
6
Location
Washington
I had a really cruel dentist years ago that mocked my fear and called me pathetic. She genuinely made the anxiety worse every visit until I simply didnt go back.

14 days ago I developed a swelling to my jaw and it took 6 days to get an emergency appointment at a dentist to look at it.
In all honesty the pain overrode a lot of the fear and I managed to go with my mother for support. I'm 40 but needed my mother to hold my hand.

Following xrays and examination it was decided that the tooth needed to come out to drain the abcess and stop the pain.
The dentist did an amazing job. No patronising etc. The found the tooth easy to remove and checked me over and sent me on my way. This was a Saturday morning.
By Tuesday the pain returned multiplied exponentially. I couldn't get an appointment yet again. I ended up in the emergency department when I was found to have a dry socket. It was packed with a clove tasting substance and I was admitted overnight (Wednesday-Thursday) as I was dehydrated from that 30 hour period and hadn't managed to eat in almost a week.
Today the packing substance feels loose and appears to be working out in small sludgy bits. I had hoped it was a sign of healing but now I have bleeding from around the packing and a returning pain. I can't even be sure it pain and not my imagination but it feels real.
I am terrified now of going back to the dentist. I'm honestly too afraid to even make the call to the office on Monday morning. It is possible that they won't even be able to see me. But if they remove the packing and the agony cones back I don't think I could take it.
I'm scared to go and scared to do nothing. So I'm about to be sitting up all night hoping this bleeding stops.

I would do anything to avoid having to go back in that chair! Yes she was great with me but that was before - after the resulting unexplainable level of pain, I'm more frightened than I ever have been.

Is there a way to deal with the terror? Do I even need to go?
 
Sounds like it's healing to me, occasionally after a particularly nasty dry socket the dressing stuff needs to be replaced a couple of times, but slight bleeding along with the dressing coming out sounds OK to me.
 
Thank you Gordon. That really does put me more at ease.
Got my mum to call them for an appointment and it seems that since I had been to the hospital due to the pain and lack of available pain relief, they were expecting my call. Headed there for 4.30 today. Hopefully it is a repacking job. A swelling is coming up on the jawline again but I am trying to stay calm. It hurts more when my blood pressure goes up after all.
Fingers crossed it goes as easily as possible!

Thank you again!
 
You didn't mention whether you had any antibiotics after the dry socket was packed? If not you could probably use some.
Keep me posted after your appointment please, if it's not too much trouble.
 
I will do.
The packing was done by a maxillofacial doc at A&E. He xrayed first then packed. No numbing just jambed his gloved finger around in there after he did a rinse. Not a man with a gentle touch on all the swollen gums. Said that was it and didn't prescribe anything at all other than to say I couldn't have a sip of water for an hour.
I somehow came out of it all with a bruise under my ear and a stiff clicky jaw.
In all fairness this one extraction was so stress free it just went to pot afterwards.
 
You didn't mention whether you had any antibiotics after the dry socket was packed? If not you could probably use some.
Keep me posted after your appointment please, if it's not too much trouble.

Hi Gordon!
It went really well.
I went in there feeling prepared thanks to your advice.
The dentist did an exam of the extraction socket and surrounding gum. She checked and confirmed there is some infection and could feel heat in the swelling on my jawline. Sent a prescription to my local pharmacy for me to collect in the morning.
Feel so encouraged that she told me I am doing everything right in caring for the dry socket and that unfortunately it does take longer to heal so to not hesitate to come back if the packing were to come out in a full piece or the pain/swelling gets worse.

She decided that the packing currently there is secure enough and to remove it could set back the healing and so I will keep and eye on it and as instructed allow it to slowly come apart which is what it has been doing.

Fingers and toes crossed the end of this particular journey comes sooner rather than later but I am more prepared for a possible longer haul.
Still scared of the dentist but coming here feels like it gave me a little bit of power back to stand my ground and be more brave. Thank you again!
 
Well done on getting through it. I have to say, a dry socket is probably the very worst thing that you can have happen from dental treatment. I've even had some women describe it as worse pain than childbirth.
So if you can manage to get through this, then really nothing else we can do to you would be nearly as bad :-)
 
The childbirth thing I'd definitely agree on. Dry socket is definitely worse. But silver lining - it's not as painful as Gallstones. I have both at the same time and can attest that the gallstone pain although brief at about 5 hours per flare are more painful, it's just they have a shorter duration.

I finally now am calm and although not pain free it's at a point of manageable with a cool pack occasionally. Refusing paracetamol having accidentaly overdosed with them at 13 in one day and getting a major telling off from the doctor.
I took time to read through the on site dentist bios and it's nice to know your a fellow Scot! And the Highlands (either now or at some time) no less. My family are all way up there in Thurso and Reay, gave me a little more reason to smile!
I'm going to continue to read through the techniques and success stories here and work on my fear. Today at least I feel like with work conquering it could be possible after all!
 
Thanks, I'll add gallstones to the list of things I'd rather avoid then :-)

You could try good old aspirin instead of paracetamol, if your stomach can handle it, it's a far better painkiller for dental purposes. People tend to overlook it these days but it's still really effective.

I found an old family tree just after we moved here (near Glencoe) and discovered that my family originated around Appin and the surrounding area, must be some kind of shared genetic memory or something that made me feel so at home here.
 
Hi Gordon!
I wanted to drop back in and let you know I made it through.
I braved a total of 4 trips to the dentist from the initial emergency one for abcess and extraction then 3 further ones. One due to dry socket, then a check up on the packing which I was told was all good and commended on keeping it all clean and a third when the packing came out to reveal an infection unfortunately.
As of today I am pain free the extraction point is healing over and I am finally feeling like if I can do all that I can do a checkup and take whatever it brings with it. I just have to remember Asprin is great for pain and to breathe. The dentist said I was holding my breath which wasn't helping me any which is - in hindsight - true.

I even went on to brave the doctor yesterday which is almost as anxiety inducing - it only took one dentist to make me scared for 20 years and one doctor to make me avoid them too.
I am not sure I could take on the world now, but I can certainly be more proactive in taking care of my health.


Thank you so very much
 
Well done on going through all that and thank you for following up. If you've got through an extraction and the horrors of a dry socket then there's really nothing else we can do to you that would compare, if you can handle that you can handle anything dental!
 
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