K
Kyr
Junior member
- Joined
- May 20, 2015
- Messages
- 8
Hello all!
I'm so terrified of going to the dentist because it's been so long. I'm 30 now and I haven't been to a dentist since high school. This long absence made me fear even more about going because I'm uninsured, so I'm scared to know about how much this journey will cost since I've neglected it so long. I keep having visions of thousands of dollars... which terrifies me to no end. So for years and years I've been avoiding the dentist (despite my mom reminding me that I really need to go, to which I would reply, I promise I'll go if something hurts because I really didn't want to go and to be honest, nothing ever hurts).
Well, last Friday, something didn't hurt, but it didn't feel right. I could feel a "rubbing" on the inside of my cheek. So, I got a flashlight out to try and see what was going on, and the tooth in question (my top wisdom tooth) was more brown than white looking on the side. And I'm not talking yellowing, but actual dark brown spots. So... terrified now that my tooth is brown and rotting, I stuck my finger back there (hello gag reflex) and it feels like the entire back side of the tooth is missing! Plus a back tooth on the bottom (not a wisdom tooth though) has a hole in it and looks funny (I'm thinking maybe a metal filling fell out of it at some point? It doesn't look like the other teeth back there.) so it obviously needs fixing too. But call it a blessing (or a curse for not alerting me sooner) neither teeth, or any others have ever hurt. None are even sensitive to hot or cold.
So, I asked my dad about who his dentist is because I wanted to call to see what something like this would cost to fix, because again, I don't have insurance, but it doesn't sound like something that would be cheap. So he gave me the number, but I was already hesitant about going there, because my sister went there probably 5 years ago and had a bad experience and didn't like it. But my dad has been going there for probably 5-8 years at least every three months (that's just the special cleanings, he's gone countless other times for the "hard" work on top of that - lucky him, he's got insurance) because he didn't go to a dentist for around 10 years.
Now seeing that his teeth apparently needs so much work (or the dentist has a lot of car payments to make) scares me, because there's no way I could afford to get that kind of frequent and constant work done on my teeth, but since my absence was even longer, I'm scared that my prognosis will be even worse! And to top it all off, I've got such bad memories from when I went to the dentist of getting talked down all the time to that I'm so scared that I'll disappoint the dentist by the poor condition of my teeth. (Which in my head I "know" are poor, but in reality, I have no idea other than a couple areas which obviously need work). I know I shouldn't feel guilty and ashamed, but I do. It's an irrational fear. Plus, my childhood dentists were never gentle even when just cleaning, so I also fear the pain aspect of dentistry.
Regardless, I gathered up all my courage, grabbed the phone, and while shaking like a crazy person, dialed the number. But no one picked up. Just an answering machine message about their office hours and lunch break schedule, blah blah, whatever. But according to their message, they should have still been open for business. Okay, maybe they are just busy. So I called again a little later and a little later, but nothing. It was a long weekend here, so it looks like they took an extra long weekend. Which meant more irrational fears until Monday. Great...
Monday rolls around (today) and I even can't sleep this morning because I'm so worried to even call the dentist and make the appointment. So, I'm lying in bed early in the morning, and tossing and turning, and finally give up and decide I will try again to gather up all my courage. So, I sort of tip toe to the phone, but before I get there, my dad's girl friend says hi from behind me (which nearly gave me a heart-attack, because I was so focussed on the dental crisis) so I mention to her that I have to call the dentist and she tells me that she went to my dad's dentist before too and also, like my sister, didn't like him at all.
So, great, now I have two people that I know aren't fans of this dentist, which puts my mind at ill ease. So she and I get to talking and she tells me all about this other dentist that she goes to now and about how she really likes him and about how gentle the dentist is and how she got a wisdom tooth taken out there and it was like nothing at all, and how another lady in the office came in and squeezed her hand while she was in the chair because she was so scared. And I was thinking, this sounds like my kind of place! Catering to the cowards. Gentle. Understanding.
Then she finds me the number for that dentist and I have another mini-freakout, but make the call and the girl who answered was very nice and though I was shaking and nervous, she seemed very pleasant and I left the call feeling good because soon all this drama will have an end. I'm happy to report - my appointment is for next Thursday. (which honestly, I've been thinking about all day, the waiting is brutal - it's weird how I haven't gone in 15 years, yet I'm worried now about what if things get worse in a week and a half?)
(By the way, they quoted me about $190 for a consult with full x-rays and an explanation of future plans for what will be needed to get my mouth back to happyland. I might have paraphrased a bit there.)
Anyway, to calm my nerves after the call, I enjoyed a nice hot shower. My relief was short-lived however, because right when I came out, my dad was home (he was out when I made the appointment) and he was all harping on what a mistake I had made not going with "his" dentist. About how my sister and his girlfriend didn't know what was what and how this other dentist is going to be so much more expensive than his dentist who never charges him anything. I tried to explain to him about how he doesn't pay because he's got good insurance... but he wouldn't listen and just kept talking over me about how I should have just gone with his dentist from the get go, but I'll "figure that out" after I'm so disappointed during my first appointment at this other dentist, which will apparently make me want to automatically switch to my dad's superior dentist. He even asked me if I wanted to cancel the appointment I'd so fretted over making, and go make a new one with his...
Gotta love it, I'm still more than a week from my appointment and already feeling regrets about starting this whole mess up. Again, I know they are irrational regrets, but still, they nag at me none-the-less.
Also - sorry for being so long winded in this, but I really needed to get some of this off my chest.
I'm so terrified of going to the dentist because it's been so long. I'm 30 now and I haven't been to a dentist since high school. This long absence made me fear even more about going because I'm uninsured, so I'm scared to know about how much this journey will cost since I've neglected it so long. I keep having visions of thousands of dollars... which terrifies me to no end. So for years and years I've been avoiding the dentist (despite my mom reminding me that I really need to go, to which I would reply, I promise I'll go if something hurts because I really didn't want to go and to be honest, nothing ever hurts).
Well, last Friday, something didn't hurt, but it didn't feel right. I could feel a "rubbing" on the inside of my cheek. So, I got a flashlight out to try and see what was going on, and the tooth in question (my top wisdom tooth) was more brown than white looking on the side. And I'm not talking yellowing, but actual dark brown spots. So... terrified now that my tooth is brown and rotting, I stuck my finger back there (hello gag reflex) and it feels like the entire back side of the tooth is missing! Plus a back tooth on the bottom (not a wisdom tooth though) has a hole in it and looks funny (I'm thinking maybe a metal filling fell out of it at some point? It doesn't look like the other teeth back there.) so it obviously needs fixing too. But call it a blessing (or a curse for not alerting me sooner) neither teeth, or any others have ever hurt. None are even sensitive to hot or cold.
So, I asked my dad about who his dentist is because I wanted to call to see what something like this would cost to fix, because again, I don't have insurance, but it doesn't sound like something that would be cheap. So he gave me the number, but I was already hesitant about going there, because my sister went there probably 5 years ago and had a bad experience and didn't like it. But my dad has been going there for probably 5-8 years at least every three months (that's just the special cleanings, he's gone countless other times for the "hard" work on top of that - lucky him, he's got insurance) because he didn't go to a dentist for around 10 years.
Now seeing that his teeth apparently needs so much work (or the dentist has a lot of car payments to make) scares me, because there's no way I could afford to get that kind of frequent and constant work done on my teeth, but since my absence was even longer, I'm scared that my prognosis will be even worse! And to top it all off, I've got such bad memories from when I went to the dentist of getting talked down all the time to that I'm so scared that I'll disappoint the dentist by the poor condition of my teeth. (Which in my head I "know" are poor, but in reality, I have no idea other than a couple areas which obviously need work). I know I shouldn't feel guilty and ashamed, but I do. It's an irrational fear. Plus, my childhood dentists were never gentle even when just cleaning, so I also fear the pain aspect of dentistry.
Regardless, I gathered up all my courage, grabbed the phone, and while shaking like a crazy person, dialed the number. But no one picked up. Just an answering machine message about their office hours and lunch break schedule, blah blah, whatever. But according to their message, they should have still been open for business. Okay, maybe they are just busy. So I called again a little later and a little later, but nothing. It was a long weekend here, so it looks like they took an extra long weekend. Which meant more irrational fears until Monday. Great...
Monday rolls around (today) and I even can't sleep this morning because I'm so worried to even call the dentist and make the appointment. So, I'm lying in bed early in the morning, and tossing and turning, and finally give up and decide I will try again to gather up all my courage. So, I sort of tip toe to the phone, but before I get there, my dad's girl friend says hi from behind me (which nearly gave me a heart-attack, because I was so focussed on the dental crisis) so I mention to her that I have to call the dentist and she tells me that she went to my dad's dentist before too and also, like my sister, didn't like him at all.
So, great, now I have two people that I know aren't fans of this dentist, which puts my mind at ill ease. So she and I get to talking and she tells me all about this other dentist that she goes to now and about how she really likes him and about how gentle the dentist is and how she got a wisdom tooth taken out there and it was like nothing at all, and how another lady in the office came in and squeezed her hand while she was in the chair because she was so scared. And I was thinking, this sounds like my kind of place! Catering to the cowards. Gentle. Understanding.
Then she finds me the number for that dentist and I have another mini-freakout, but make the call and the girl who answered was very nice and though I was shaking and nervous, she seemed very pleasant and I left the call feeling good because soon all this drama will have an end. I'm happy to report - my appointment is for next Thursday. (which honestly, I've been thinking about all day, the waiting is brutal - it's weird how I haven't gone in 15 years, yet I'm worried now about what if things get worse in a week and a half?)
(By the way, they quoted me about $190 for a consult with full x-rays and an explanation of future plans for what will be needed to get my mouth back to happyland. I might have paraphrased a bit there.)
Anyway, to calm my nerves after the call, I enjoyed a nice hot shower. My relief was short-lived however, because right when I came out, my dad was home (he was out when I made the appointment) and he was all harping on what a mistake I had made not going with "his" dentist. About how my sister and his girlfriend didn't know what was what and how this other dentist is going to be so much more expensive than his dentist who never charges him anything. I tried to explain to him about how he doesn't pay because he's got good insurance... but he wouldn't listen and just kept talking over me about how I should have just gone with his dentist from the get go, but I'll "figure that out" after I'm so disappointed during my first appointment at this other dentist, which will apparently make me want to automatically switch to my dad's superior dentist. He even asked me if I wanted to cancel the appointment I'd so fretted over making, and go make a new one with his...
Gotta love it, I'm still more than a week from my appointment and already feeling regrets about starting this whole mess up. Again, I know they are irrational regrets, but still, they nag at me none-the-less.
Also - sorry for being so long winded in this, but I really needed to get some of this off my chest.